What have you learned that are the most important things you would advise someone...?

Question

who's going to be in a long-term relationship? List 5-10 things that make a relationship sucessful

this is for my psych class, if u could answer it, it would really help me! please only people who have been in a long term relationship of 5 yrs or more..

Answer 1

It all comes down to character and attitude of the people involved.

Character:

1. Integrity: is who they say they are actions, words, emotions are congruent.
2. Confidence: is an assertive person with high self-esteem.
3. Respect: earns respect and demands the respect earned. Accords others the respect they have earned, treats people generally well.
4. Flexible: not too structured, everything doesn't have to be their way.
5. Self-control: has their act together,grooms well, pays bills on time, no out-of-control compulsive habbits, no anger management or other issues.
6. Affectionate

Attitude: Is generally positive and agreeable.

Answer 2

Below mentioned are the most imp. advice of my father which really helps me in my day - to - day life: Keep your eye on the ball. Do things the hard way sometimes--it's good practice. Some bullies will respect you if you stand up to them; others are dangerous sociopaths who should be avoided altogether. You can turn a loss into a win by learning something from it. Stand up straight, shake hands firmly and look people in the eye. No matter how good you are at your job, you won't get anywhere if nobody notices. Life is short. Enjoy it. Become physically fit when you're young and it's still relatively easy No discomfort, no gain. Don't lose track of your old friends; it's important to have people around who know where you came from. Always use protection. Your word is your bond. If you want to be taken seriously as an adult, don't wear your baseball cap backward after the age of 18--unless, of course, you're a major league catcher. Watch out how you treat your mother; sooner or later you'll treat other women that way, too. Never say you can't do something well until you've practiced doing it a lot. Learn basic auto repair. Anything you depend on that much you'd better know how to fix. Don't get married because you want to get married; get married because you want to marry her. Even if you think you know how to put something together, read the instructions first. Don't just listen to what people say; try to figure out why they're saying it. When you're afraid of something, admit it--if only to yourself. No matter what it costs you to be who you really are, it's worth it. Women will never understand the Three Stooges. Protect your heart with regular cardio workouts, and by staying away from women with more than one tattoo. Exercise machine? Try walking around the block a few times, buster. Think about what you'd like to remember when you're old; it may help you decide what to do tomorrow. People will treat you well if you let them--or if you show them that you won't stand for anything less. If you lend money to a friend, not only may you never see the money again, you may never see the friend again, either. If you're going to waste time, at least do it with your buddies. Give your own son advice even if he doesn't seem to be listening; he'll remember it when he really needs to.

Answer 3

I have been married for almost 8yrs and together for almost 10yrs. I would have to say this here are ten or more things that make a relationship last.

1. Honest and Trusting, no jealous personality.
2. Faithful Extremely important!- meaning no cheating!
3. No secrets
4. Caring and Generous
5. Loving and kind
6. Independent no clingyness
7. Loving a person for who they are not what they can buy you!.
8. Understanding listens well.
9 Good Communication is a must.
10. Likes sex.
11. Have similar interests.
12. Attractive to a degree.
13. Non-controlling either spouse.
14. Goal striving.
15. Non-materialistic or knows not to spend money they don't have.
16. For me knows GOD!
I hope these help you out I'm in the health field myself and well these I know have helped me and my wife through good times and bad.

Answer 4

1, Do not sneak around with even small things which could
undermine the trust in your relationship.

2. When you make a mistake, admit it and don't try to lie your
way out of it.

3. When you and your intended have a quarrel, sit down and
settle it before you go to bed. Don't let it just continue to
fester and build up.

4. Look for the good things about your partner. Don't look
for his/her shortcomings.

5. If you believe that you are unhappy in your relationship,
tell your spouse first, then if the two of you can't work
things out, file for a divorce or whatever and get on with
your life. Don't have affairs behind your spouses back.

Answer 5

1. Know that all relationships have their ups and downs and don't give up on it during a down time.

2. Pay as much attention to your spouse as to your kids because the kids will leave home some day and you'll still want to have a relationship with your spouse.

3. Treat your spouse as politely and with as much respect as you would a stranger.

4. Do little things to please your spouse.

5. Don't talk too much when you're angry because you can say hurtful things that you can't take back.

6. Sometimes a hug or making love is better than words.

Answer 6

Prepare a list of Terms of Engagement for fighting. Yes, really. Write down mutually acceptable rules for how you will resolve conflict. Mine and my wife's include:

1. No name calling.
2. No bringing up old arguments.
3. No ad hominem attacks.
4. No shouting.
5. No telling the other person what they are thinking.
("You're just saying that because you think . . .")
6. No dragging other people into it.
7. No comparisons to other people.
("You're acting just like your mother!")
8. 5 min. breaks every hour.
9. No using sex as a weapon.
10. Fight naked.

Answer 7

Ive been married for 7 yrs now goin on 8. And the best thing to make a relationship/marriage work is to love one another, trust, honesty, communication and respect for one another...

Answer 8

Love, trust, compatibility, sex, sense of humor, understanding, respect.....I could go on and on. I think relationships need constant attention and once they are neglected, like plants, they wilt. They can survive during brief periods without sun, water ( love, attention ) but will eventually die if left on their own.

I think people think that marriage is easy and if it isn't then it wasn't mean to be.......that is pure crap. Marriage is a partnership that requires contstant attention and fine-tuning...communication is essential. And I also think people highly underrate how important sex is.....most of the people who are happily married and have been for a long time are having sex often - regardless of age.

Answer 9

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen."

Answer 10

1. Honesty
2. Open communication Always
3. Mutual Respect for each other
5 Never forget to appreciate the other person
6 Compromise
7 Love Each Other