Why do men think that they can talk to you any way they want?

Question

My husband is a military man who thinks he doesnt make mistakes. When he gets upset he talks to me as if i'm one of them. I'm getting to the point I can't deal with it anymore. Could it be something else to it? Help please.

Answer 1

he is just a freakin jerk honey, and will probably never change, sorry

Answer 2

Here's some enlightenment for you. People treat us how we TEACH them to treat us. Somewhere along the line, he treated you this way, and got the notion from you that it was at least tolerable. YOU HAVE TO LET HIM KNOW THAT BOAT DON'T FLOAT NO MORE! If you're tired of it, talk to him and tell him that he cannot talk to you this way anymore, because you are NOT a dog. And then, stick to your guns and DON'T let him! If there are words, but no action, then he's not going to believe you anyway. Let him know you want the same respect you give him, and if he can't do that, then ....
"Don't let the door hit cha where the Good Lord split cha."

Answer 3

The problem here is that either through his family or his buddies he has learned to think of his wife as his property, rather than as an equal.

His inability to admit that he is wrong may be a sign that he is also an abuser. Abusers are unwilling to admit that they make mistakes and see their wives as property to be used as they wish.

Be very careful and if he is abusive, leave him and go to a women's shelter.

Take care,
Troy

Answer 4

I worked for the military for years and left because of the way of that attitude. One thing I did learn while I worked for them:

Military wives are a strong group of women. Not everyone could do what you do.

Answer 5

some people are programmed to be harsh. sometimes people bring their work life and mannerisms home with them.

have you considered asking him to listen to you. let him know about your feelings. tell him you are feeling disrespected or talked down to, and as if you're not his wife anymore.

i know my boyfriend talks "trash" sometimes around me because they don't know how to speak proper English where he works... i have told him that using the F word in every sentence isn't becoming and is offensive. He didn't even realize he was doing it!

take care. and i hope things work out.

Answer 6

#1, he's a male
#2, he's in the military
#3, you allowed it to begin with

Answer 7

Tell him flat-out that you did not enlist, and you are not one of his recruits. Tell him that he needs to treat you as a wife - an equal partner - and not a subordinate. Give him examples of the sort of phrasing you would prefer - "Honey, I think we need to reexamine our budget before buying any more non-essential items" rather than "You do NOT have my permission to buy any more shoes!"
If he is resistant, ask him to come with you to marital counseling to help restore the harmony in your marriage - and help save it.

Answer 8

he's a pig who wants all the control. I am hearing about this more and more from my sister in Colorado. Her friends have been crying on her shoulder alot recently because of what you've listed and one is filing divorce soon.

Answer 9

the only way a a man talks to you anyway he wants is because you let him , you need to put a stop to it because if he knows he could , he will .

Answer 10

My boyfriend is in the army and is the same way. There is many reason my boyfriend gets like that if you want write me and we can talk

Answer 11

Because you haven't put your foot down. Remind him you're his wife not one of his cadets. Show him where you stand and make sure he knows that you don't hide in his shadow, you stand beside him, not behind in the shadows or in front taking all the light, you're even to him and he should respect that.