I have a couple of friends that are constantly comparing/calling their children retarded. They say things like get your fingers out of your mouth you look like a retarded child, your are related to your retarded mother, are you retarded, and the most confusing for me you are not retarded. I have talked to them about this once and nothing changed? My question is am I wrong or would listening to this offend you?
2007-04-17 19:34:34 · 35 answers · asked by j_elam22 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
No as far as I am concerned you are not wrong, I have a 12yr old child and sometimes they will be prone to do or say something that isn't very bright. Now as we all know kids are going to do things like that, but I most definately don't call them a retard, or say quit acting like a retard.
Those kind of comments are very off colored, even in a joking sense and I don't think a coment like that could even be catagorized as such. I most definately would have said something to any of my friends for comments like that.
No you were not wrong!!!!!!, and yes it would be very offensive to me.
2007-04-17 19:43:45 · answer #1 · answered by kmjreade 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is rude and I would be deeply offended at their total lack of respect for who their child is. Calling a child retarded is not only going to cause self confidence issues but also may make the child feel like their parents expect nothing out of them thus they turn into the rejects of society that don't amount to anything (people who live in jails cuz they are too lazy to get a proper job and become productive members of society). Calling a child retarded constantly can cause so many negative effects it isn't even funny. Shame on them for ruining their child's future...we should build our children up not tear them down. Plus retardation is a legitimate medical condition that should not be made fun of.
2007-04-17 19:39:58 · answer #2 · answered by MOMMY585 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hell yes I'm offended! I'm not a Mom, but you don't have to be one to know that. I used to stutter and my Mom called me a retarded kid. I got a B in science and my Mom called me retarded. I mispronouced a couple of words and I was called a retard. When she was calling me a retard, I talked backed for once in my etire life and told her thats damageing my mind so horibly right now. She stopped after a week or so.
But, it's also offending to the mentally challenged people. There ISN'T ANYTHIGN wrong with it! It's whats inside that realy counts!
2007-04-17 21:28:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It depends on how it is said. I tell my child to come here, let me fix your pants so people don't think you are retarded, but it is said to reflect badly on me for putting his pants on crooked, or putting his shoes on him on the wrong feet. If they are just out right calling him retarded, then it would probably offend me, like saying you are related to your retard mother is wrong. Unfortunately, they may not feel the same way, and all you can do is ask that they don't do it around you.
2007-04-17 19:39:20 · answer #4 · answered by ALFimzadi 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong. Two things this is doing to the children.One is that it is giving the children doubts about their selves...they are probably wondering inside..."am I retarded?" They don't know, if their parents tell them so, then it must be so.
The other thing this name-calling is doing is building up a hatred toward people who are retarded. Retardation should not be looked at as a reason to hate someone.
This is verbal abuse toward the children. Do they not love their children? Who could not love their own child...but I see it all the time...It makes me sad:-(
2007-04-17 19:41:01 · answer #5 · answered by suigeneris-impetus 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it offends me. Why would any loving parent call their child retarded? They are going to scar their children for life! Plus they should think about the parents of children who are mentally handicapped! Sounds like the need a couple of parenting lessons!
2007-04-17 19:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by llllll_amanda_lllllll 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no u r not wrong,u r just able to sense something worth taking care of.i am a teacher and feels extremely angry if ANYONE calls any child normal or retarded ,any names like fool,stupid,duffer etc.retarded is however a far bigger word.i quite appriciate that u feel that way and wonder why they dont.there are various examples in my own experience that children(normal or retarded) suffer badly if addressed like thisand tend to become careless,nonchalant,abusers,low self esteem,low mental vigour etc.u wud be surprized that even a lot of teachers indulge in addressing their pupils like this.u could talk to them very delicately about the bad effects of this type of behaviour. or their is one thing VERY effective u cud do; whenever anyone says like that in front of u, u cud approach the child, fodle him affectionately and tell him that his behaviour or habit was slightly less becoming which angered his parents that's why they said it; stress that he is NOT RETARDED but actually a very bright child. This would create a magical effect on him and his habit (he would strive not to do it if u hav successfully driven the point home) and if his parents are not blind and deaf certainly they would realize their they mistake.
my real sis was doing the same thing to my pretty 4 year old niece and the little one was suffering badly, turning into a totallly unmanagable hooligana and nill in class.i took her under my care for 2 years and lo ! she turned out to be the BRIGHTEST kid !!!
2007-04-17 22:15:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not a parent, but I don't think that makes a difference. I would be offended. You don't call your children retards... it damages their self esteem. It isn't really your place to comment though, unfortunately. Some parents just don't know how to talk to their children.
2007-04-17 19:37:06 · answer #8 · answered by * 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is actually considered mental abuse. I feel soory for those children because it is going to affect their entire future. Parents can be so very ignorant. I would tell them how you feel and let them know that you will not come over to their home any more or associate with them unless they stop doing it. If while you are with them they start doing it again, leave. Eventually, they will either stop, or you will find that they have been weeded out of your life. Unfortunately, you cannot make people behave better than they are. It is sad.
2007-04-17 22:56:38 · answer #9 · answered by Raspberi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know one thing for certain that my 14 yr old step son is constantly calling my eldest retarded.....and he gets shot down in flames over it.
I guess the one question that I have for you is if this offends you why do you choose to still be friends with them?
2007-04-17 19:40:16 · answer #10 · answered by sanerstii 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋