Should I give up my virginity this Saturday night to my Special Boy that I deeply love?

Question

I'm 18 and he's turning 18 in a few months (I'm the older woman lol lol). I first met him when we were both 13. I guess in the beginning he was my crush. Now I love him and want to marry him. Around 15 we started to help each other get relief with our hands and that we do on a pretty regular basis. Usually at his home after school before his mom and step dad come home from work. We don't have much time. Lately I want him completely and I think he really wants me too. This weekend is a once in a lifetime opportunity. My parents are going away for the weekend and taking my 13 year old brother (what a relief!!). His parents are going away for the weekend and there are still my nosy grandparents that I have to report to on my cell phone BUT both he and I have a driving lesson (we are in the same car) on Saturday. The instructor will drop us off whereever we want so we could be dropped off at his house for some fun. Maybe we could be intimate for about two to three hours.

I'm really glad I asked this question. The answers I received were like being doused with cold water. All you wonderful people are sooo right. I need to wait. One thing I know this boy very well. He's still a virgin like me (except for one time he was forced to have intercourse with another male when he was 13 and it wound up a police matter) but that doesn't count and as far as I'm concerned he's as pure as the driven snow. He doesn't have stds and he and I are almost constantly together so there is no way he could have done it without my knowing. We both have very protective families so when we are together we are rarly alone without other family or friends around. But anyway after all the wonderful answers I going to throw that idea in the trash and we will ask the instructor to drop us off at my house where my grandparents will be and instead of going out maybe we will eat pizza and popcorn and watch DVD movies. Oh maybe will have a few friends over to join us. Thanks all

Answer 1

Sounds like you are ready and go for it baby! Enjoy it, but don't expect it to be fantastic and completely enjoyable and perfect the first time. But, if you are close to one another and he cares about you, then it should be a great experience. Something very special to share with one another. Use protection if he has been with other girls is my only advice.

Answer 2

It sounds like fun but it will just create more problems unless you have unlimited money and want to start a family now and not proceed on to further education. In about 5 years or less you will look back and wonder why you did this or thought about it. I know it is almost impossible for you to see this now due to raging hormones but it happens to be true. If you love each other so much you can wait and if not, then it was meant to be. Can you possibly arrange to be with your ' nosy' grandparents? maybe play cards or scrabble with them to be diverted from this temptation? The reason I am saying this besides the fact you may regret losing your virginity if you do not end up marrying is because no method of birth control is 100 percent successful. I hope you will think about it more and I am encouraged that you wrote here since it means you are thoughtful and intelligent.

Answer 3

I think u should, I mean u 2 r 18 or almost 18 and this is a once in a life time for u right now so get going with it and have some fun and u to have known each other for a really long time and u have been going well with the hands time to step it up a notch lol.

Answer 4

I do hope you wait until you marry this wonderful man and think of the trouble you could get into~ as if you were married it would not be a once in a lifetime opportunity

Your parents and Grandparents are expecting you not to lie, so think of the trouble if you were to get caught or ~ The rubber breaking =a baby!! you are very young still , I understand you want to make this special but think of how special your wedding day will be if you wait!!

Plus do you have the money for a baby or the time>? If you don't have the time or money for baby wait on Sex until your married!!!

you have a big decision to make!! Much Luck!!

Answer 5

The decision has to be up to you, but the fact that you are asking the question makes me think you are not quite ready for the responsibility. This is a big step for a girl and once done there is no going back. You will know in your heart when you are ready. It really sounds like you are trying to do something for the thrill of not getting caught not because of love.

Hope this helps.

Answer 6

If there is any question in your mind and heart I would say no. (And I assume there is since you are asking this question) It is a big decision to make. I lost mine to a guy I thought I loved when I was 18. I have spent 3 years regreting that so much. Religion aside, it is smart to wait until you are married. Think of the STD's (even though you think it wont happen with him it's possible!) as well as the emotional aspect of sex. It is proven that people who have had multiple sex partners have a harder time trusting in marriage. If you go ahead with it use protection!!!

Answer 7

*Well it's your choice. But losing your virginity is a big deal.*

~So I mean you are eventually going to lose it one day anyways, not that, that means you should just run out and have sex based on that alone. But I mean sooner or later it will happen.
And if you honestly feel you are ready to give that up to someone...then that is your decision and you have to deal with the emotional consequences that may follow behind it.
.Such as...the guy you lose your virginity to may not be "THE ONE" for you, and you need to understand that.
.You can get pregnant (use those condoms and birth control PLEASE!)
....and this guy you want to give yourself to (so to speak) may not stick around forever, and that is also something you will have to learn to deal with.

.So weigh it and you are legally an adult now...and I don't see anything wrong with you having sex at all. Just as long as it is really what you want and you are safe about it, because that is your business not mine.

**Well hope you make a good choice.

Answer 8

sadly honey i agree with everyone else. if you do truly love him and he truly loves you then you don't have to take advantage of the house being empty to be the perfect moment for you two to have sex. i was in a similar situation and my parents left for a weekend and i wasn't ready but we had sex anyways, know what happened? a week later he told me he had cheated on me a month ago. while i hope this wouldn't happen to you i still think that if you realyl love each other and want to get married then the right time will come when you're both ready.

Answer 9

Sex not occur before:
1. You are ready to deal with a pregnancy, should it occur
2. You are ready to deal with an STD, should it occur
3. When you know how a woman can become pregnant (all the ways it can occur)
4. When you know what the various STDs are and how they are transmitted and how to help protect against them
5. When you are ready to insist your partner wear a condom (female) or insist that you wear one (male)
6. When you are on a reliable form of birth control and using it properly (female) or ensure that she is (male)
7. When you are ready to deal with any emotional issues that may come from being intimate with another person

Until you've got those things covered, you should not have sex.

Answer 10

I know how eager you may be to have sex, but I have to suggest that you wait a little longer. First of all, it would be good for both of you to be 18.

Secondly, you would want to be well educated about sex, STD's, AIDS, birth control, pregnancy, etc.

You'll also want to consider the physical and emotional ramifications of the physical sexual act, there are many.

And doing it for the first time is so special, you want it to be something where you won't be rushed, or feel guilty, or worry that someone will walk in on you.

Answer 11

I also agree with the NO's you've been getting.
You didn't say if you two have talked about this, but you didn't give any indication of him trying to pressure you into and if that is the case then just let it be. Why run the risk of changing how things are?

Also....don't do it just out of convenience (that both sets of parents are gone). Since its your first time it really should be special and not so much under pressure.