any suggestions on how to avoid a temper tantrum from my 2 year old daughter?

Question

If I tell her no, which I do tell her no often, because at this age she is into everything and I want to teach her right from wrong, she gets so worked up and is crying and on the ground and if you try to pick her up she won't let you. Any tips on how to tell her no and avoid the whole tantrum that follows?

Answer 1

Speaking as a mom, the best thing you can do is ignore her.My son used to throw the biggest fits. If you pay attention to it, they will keep it up.You have to stick to your guns and make no mean no. When the tantrums start leave the room.Pretty soon she will figure out its not so why bother.

Answer 2

While some folks do not believe in it I recommend reading the book Holding Time by Martha Welch. My daughter started with tantrums and within a couple months of ignoring them she escalated to full blown rages. She was 2.5 years old at that time. I started using Holding Time a couple weeks before her third birthday and after five straight days of holding time the rages and temper tantrums just stopped. Like there was a switch in her or something. The rages and tantrums went on for several months before I found out about holding time.

Check it out and see if it is something you want to do. My daughter had maybe 3 or 4 what I would call regular tantrums over several months after that but never rages. Yes, she whines and cries about not getting what she wants all the time but she do not have tantrums. Holding Time has been a life saver for us. Some people think it is cruel because you are holding your child against their will but if your child is upset and angry, instead of ignoring them (makes them more angry) why not hold them close and while you stay calm tell them you love them and are there for them. I don't see the harm and it works!

Answer 3

Laughing about the "be the parent" comment.

At 2 years old you should still be able to pick her up whether she is screaming and kicking or not. (Unless there is some medical reason you cannot.) I have a 9 year old, a 4 year old, a 3 year old, and a 6 month old. Full house here. I never allowed tantrums to go on. If they throw a fit when we are out, they go straight to the car. If that meant I had to go with them, so be it. I missed a few meals out with the family with each child, but they do not throw fits anymore when we are out doing things.
At home, they go straight to bed. I carry them and plop them on their bed if I have to. Shut the door and ignore them until they are finished and ready to talk.

I can say that there will always be a few meltdowns with each child. If nothing else, they have to test the waters. If they are let go and they get their way once from those fits, they will continue.

I personally have adapted my "no".
For me it is "get out of the cupboards and go play with your cars, or dolls, or toys." or "no you can not have cookies, but there are some apple slices"
Instead of always using a flat no, alot of times I throw options out there. There are those times when a simple no is needed. Kids getting into things that will hurt them is a NO! Sometimes I will clap and tell them no like you do at a dog.. LOL. It gets enough attention that they do not take time to get upset about it.

I wish you luck in getting through the terrible two's. Not a simple time to sort out with some kids.

Answer 4

forget approximately approximately HER! temper tantrums might properly be defined an excellent form of diverse techniques and the youngster phsyc majors will all inform you that she's merely "expressing herself". I say horse poop! She's appearing out for interest, do no longer supply in to her, permit her pull her hair, permit her scream, and DON"T supply IN TO HER. forget approximately approximately yet, and it is extremely significant, while she quiets down, even purely a sprint, pass to her and ask her if she might like an determination to in spite of she wanted, then softly admonish her habit telling her that she shouldn't act that way, it is totally disappointing to you, and huge females do no longer act that way. each and every of the on a similar time as permit her hear the affection on your voice, yet shop the tone strict, letting her understand you recommend organization. this might take an excellent form of time and staying power, and it would desire to be ten tantrums in the previous you spot a metamorphosis, even nevertheless it is properly worth it. additionally you will word that as you get them below administration at domicile, she might act out extra in public, the place she knows she gets a reaction from you. carry in there lady, it will paintings out, do exactly no longer infant her, permit her throw her extra healthful, deliver her to her room until eventually she's waiting to act, and you will discover her coming around. the main mandatory component to undergo in recommendations is to no longer supply in to what she needs just to close her up, and continually permit her understand that that habit is unacceptable after it is over. in case you attempt on a similar time as she's mid-extra healthful it is merely going to make her madder. and of direction, notably, tell her you love her and supply her a great hug while she straightens out. good good fortune!

Answer 5

Tantrums at this stage are pretty much unavoidable.
When she starts freaking out, pick her up and put her in a quiet area where she can be by herself. In as calm a voice as you can manage, quietly explain to her that tantrums (or whining, yelling, whatever) are unacceptable behavior, that she needs to calm herself down and pull it together, and when she can speak and behave calmly, you will do something fun together, like color, etc.

Once she's done the fit, congratulate her on pulling it together, give her a big hug and a snuggle, and get on with the activity you promised, or just keep on with whatever was going on prior to the tantrum.
It's all about diversion and paying as little attention to the unwanted behavior as possible. Unfortunately, girls seem to be able to hold out way longer than boys when it comes to this method (I've heard it referred to as "ignoring to extinction") of behavioral modification.
Stay strong.

Answer 6

Hello, I know the feeling. I'm a mother myself, and am dead tired of tantrums. But it is key to understand them and know where they are coming form and why the happen. They happen a lot when a child is not satisfied, and wants something but can't have it. It's all about being outside the box. You see, if you wanted a snow cone and your mother wouldn't let you have it, why would YOU throw a fit? It's tasty, it's colorful, and everyone else is getting one. But what if you can change these aspects? For example, pretend you and your daughter went for a walk in the park. She wanted a snow cone. You couldn't afford it or the time at the moment and so you said no. Rewind. What's in your tone when you say "no"?
What does your daughter hear? Your daughter probably hears "no, I won't let you!" because she is just recovering the drop of her hopes that have been locked inside her. What if you could catch this hope, without the temptation of spoiling or bribing? You could simply grab her attention, "oh look at those birds! Do you want to go feed the birds?" Your daughter may not budge. My kids sometimes don't either. Sure, there will be tears and there will be pouts. But the most important thing is keep cool. If you get mad, then she'll get scared or even more mad. If you try to hug her then she'll get the feeling that you feel bad for her, that she is a "baby." But this does not mean to get tough, it just means she needs some time to think. If she begins to cry and scream then you need to tell her no. I realize this doesn't always work, in fact, it hardly does. You need to tell her if she does that again he'll get a consequence. (no TV, a time out, etc... but since she's only 2 I would keep it easy) Once i was in the grocery with my daughter who was 3 years old. She wanted a chocolate bar and I didn't want to allow that kind of fat going into her body, she had just come from a birthday party anyways. What I told his is, "No Claire, some other time. Today we're going home for lunch." She started to cry and was hanging off the cart like a leach.
"I want the candy bar!" She started wailing, and other people were staring! I sat her in the cart and said no, then immediately got out of the candy isle. She cried for a little while, and I told her to please be quiet. I made being quiet into a game. Who could be the quietest the longest? And I let her win, so that she was the champion of being quiet. This was her claim to fame for a while, and sometimes even today, when she's a teenager, when we head to the grocery we play the quiet game while she helps me shop.
It's also important to have backups. When your near the bakery of Stop and Shop, break out the animal crackers so that she has something to much on while passing the cakes.
Once my kids wanted to make a fort in the living room, I had just cleaned and I knew how they always turned out. I said not today, and said if they were willing to clean up after wards, they could make one outside in the tree house. If they didn't put away all the things they got out they couldn't ever have one in the living room again. (Sort of preparation, you know?)
When a tantrum begins, and your child can not hear you or see you, and everything is just a blur; keep cool. Your child wants you to get angry because she wants to FIGHT. If you stand there, looking angry, impatient, and scary, she'll probably stop. She'll get very mad at you, but she has no fuel for her fit any more. Good luck with your little one!

Answer 7

Not all mothers belive in spanking a child. Typically my 20 month old son is horrible about throwing himself on the floor and screaming and crying. I have tired time out and yeah that doesn't work so my suggestion is swat your child on the butt and if she still does it swat her again and put her in her bed and tell her when you want to be a big girl let me know. My son has gotten better now that he gets a couple swats and goes to his bed.

Answer 8

Exactly, who's the parent here...............................
Step up to the plate and be the parent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Children need; love, structure and discipline!!!!!!!!!!!!
Right now, she knows you won't do anything about stopping her tantrums - so she continues. Be the parent!!!!!!!!!!!!