My boyfriend wants me to start trusting him again? How do I do this?

Question

I've been with him for 6 years. I'm 26 and he's 31. Recently some things have happened and I feel I can't trust him. I caught him talking dirty to other girls online and saying he's single on his myspace. He said he didn't know how to change his relationship status, but then he changed his account to private after I confronted him, so that makes me think some was going on that he didn't want me to know. He clamed he changed it to private cause people he didn't know kept sending him friend requests. He also said he was just talking dirty to these other girls as a joke. I really don't want to break up with him, but I don't know how to go about trusting him again. Maybe the excuses he told were true, but I don't know what to believe. Is it possible to trust someone ever again?

Answer 1

Dump him like a bad habit, because he is one.
You're looking for ways to look past his inconsistencies and weaknesses so you can somehow trust he isn't engaged in affairs and liasons?

He's cheating on you, hasn't apologized, and is making excuses and lying to you to try and move forward. Your codependency issues with him have reached an untenable and unhealthy level. Leave him and breath a sigh of relief after you're separate from him.

Answer 2

You are hurt and he is hiding something from you. I really don't think talking sex over the Internet is really cheating but you have to define what is cheating to you. You can ask him to stop but I know he will only do it behind your back , at least you know what he is doing now. The thing is, is he giving out his phone number or not being able to account for time away from you, then that's when you start having problems. Sometimes people need that added bust from someone other than you don't mean that they don't love you it only mean that they are still trying to see if they still got it. 6 years is a long time to be with someone and you know what they say about the 7 year itch, but what you need to think about is, do he plan on marrying you one day. Technically he is single because yall are not married so he have not lied. The question is how strong is your relationship and do you have reasons not to trust him besides the Internet.

Answer 3

Love can make you believe anything you decide that you want to believe. As an uninvolved observer, I would bet my life he is cheating. That online sex chat is addicting. He may also be cheating in person too. Don't trust him. If he is hiding something, then you need to confront him. There is no love without trust. He has proven that you can not trust him. Then he made it private, on top of that. Tells me he has something to hide. Hate to have to tell you, but it isn't worth it. You will never be able to trust him again. In the back of your mind, you will always wonder. That is a horrible way to live the rest of your life. I sure hope that you make the right decision. You deserve an honest relationship.

Answer 4

He's probably soliciting cyber sex and possibly phone sex from girls online. And no person in the right mind wouldn't know how to change the settings on his/her relationship status, if you can't even do that, how do you handle the entire account?! And all those other things that he told you about changing his profile to private, that requires some "intelligence" to change the settings, no?

Show him how serious his actions are by ending this relationship. He's very stupid for doing such nonsensical things that takes away the trust in a relationship.

Answer 5

He's 31 and on Myspace?
Dump him. If he knows how to change his page from public to private then he knows how to change his relationship status. Make an account and then send him an add. make sure he knows it's not you. Talk to him and ask if he has a girlfriend. if he says no, then why keep the relationship going?

Answer 6

If you were with him for six years, i think you have enough reason to trust him. Guys normally have this habit of having a serious GF and some fun gf's. So i would say try to stick on with him make him get rid of this habit. The best way would be take some time off and tell him why you are doing this so that he feels bad about his habits.

Answer 7

Me,
Perception is most peoples reality. If you feel that your boyfriend is being unfaithful, then he probably is. The best way to get the whole situation of trust back online, is to confront the issues directly that are making you feel this way. The fact that he has interactions with the opposite sex in Cyberspace is not concrete evidence of infidelity. There is more to this, and I don't know if you will share it here or not. The biggest thing to remember is to love yourself first. Do right by you, and everything else will fall into place where it should be.

Answer 8

This guy is trouble & it's time to move on. People don't do the things he's doing without intent (whether it happens or not). When it comes to the heart I don't give second chances. Someone who TRULY loves you would NEVER hurt you like this. It's not a weak moment, it's not because he's a guy it's because he has no morals or respect for anyone including himself. Good luck sweetie, you deserve much better than this creep.

Answer 9

HI FRIEND .i read your problem.first i want to tell you that i am a boy and what i think. I want that girls talk with me.i feel fun in this but the mean of this is not that i want to cheat someone who loves me but this type of habit can cause problem for me so i will never tell about my habit to this person.But the mean of this is not that i want to do something which is wrong. So i want to give you suggestion that you can believe on him.

Answer 10

Sometimes these kind of theings happens when girls not given what BF expected. Then he tries to get some things from others. If you give everything that kind of things never happens