When will you stop blaming your mother for all your problems and shortcomings?

Answer 1

I never did blame her for my problems, people need to accept responsiblity for their actions, instead of laying the blame on someone else.

Answer 2

Shortcomings are classified as developmental problems that come short of expectation. Some shortcomings are the result of to little information or training, some from the mismanagement or misuse of dicipline, some from lies, some from deceit, and then there are those that are not really shortcomings but the use of an over active expectation that needs an excuse to b***h.

Answer 3

I don't think that I ever blamed my mother for any of my problems or shortcomings. I don't believe that it is her fault for any problem that I may have had in the past or currently. If anything I think the world of my mother for teaching me the things that she did and showing me that I can take care of myself.

Answer 4

Good question. Your parents do have a huge influence on how you turn out, however, once you are an adult, you can no longer blame your behavior on your parents. You grow up and start making your own decisions and hopefully learn something from the mistakes your parents may have made. But don't blame it on them any more, take responsibility for yourself.

Answer 5

There are some truly "bad" parents, but most parents don't sit up nights trying to figure how to make their children miserable or to mess up their lives, ya know?
Parenting is a skill and responsibility for Mother's and Father's to perform toward children. If you are grown up, you can love your Mother and Father without liking the way you were parented. Forgive their ignorance and remember, they had parents who raised them and maybe they were hurt also by it? Just don't determine to be a BETTER parent, but LEARN to do things well, lovingly, and learn about the development stages of children and what are healthy ways to address these different times.
IF YOU HAVE TRULY BEEN ABUSED OR WOUNDED, go to a counselor and learn how to get past this. Blaming won't help you. IF everyone in the world agrees your parents were horrible, unfair, unkind, etc., it still won't help you very much even though you do need to be validated that you didn't deserve 'bad' treatment. When you judge your Mother, you will become just like her no matter how hard you try to be different. That's a law of life! To bring your heart and feelings to a place of peace is what you need and that will only come through forgiveness of your Mother, but you don't EVER have to agree that what happened to you was OK! If you have been hurt, it is NOT okay!
I tried Christian counseling after many years of secular counseling and I finally "got it". God hates the things that happened to me (I was abused by both parents and they never took responsibility openly). I asked my father (when he was older and I was an adult) to forgive me for all the things I had held against him and told him I had been in much counseling to try and get some peace in my heart toward him. He "broke" and cried and asked me to forgive him and I knew he was truly sorry. It was enough. His only statement afterward was to say, "I can't believe I did those things."
After my Dad died, my Mother told me that Dad had told her she needed to make things 'right' with her children.., she asked my forgiveness and said she had no excuses, but was sorry for not being a better Mother for me and that I had always been a good daughter and she loved me.
It's over, but my attitude had already changed when I learned that forgiveness gave me the power to live my life without being a victim.
Negative actions can be called what they are and never excused, but the people who did them can be 'let off the hook' and when you tell them that, it really goes into the 'right place' in their heart. They no longer have to be defensive and will often (not always) make it right. Usually guilt has become their tormentor anyway.
You can't UNDO what was done, but it can become powerless to continue to torment you.

Answer 6

I wouldn't blame parents for shortcoming, but thngs such as the ability to trust. Parents may belittle,

Answer 7

Since you know you are doing the blame, NOW is the answer. Parents are not saints and make mistakes, but they are not to blame for what you do or think as you get older. It is now that the decisions belong to you.

Answer 8

think about this if it wasn't for your mother you wouldn't be here to blame any one now would you !
that's your mom and no matter what you do or where you go in life she will always be there for you when no one you may think cares is so grow up get over you selfish brat stage and tell your mom thank you for having your *** and prove it to her by standing on your own two feet and taking the blame for your own stupid F-UP's in your life.

Answer 9

oh gosh! i wish someone could make my silly borthers see this b/c they do the same darn thing i mean i think that after you turn a age as to where you can make your life what you want it to be on your own there is no more excuses. thery are 24 and 27 still blaming mother

Answer 10

I hate those people who blame everything on their upbringing. Especially the ones who complain about being abused as a child because they were spanked, it's like enough already, now shut up and get on with your life before I start abusing you.