http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070416/ap_on_re_us/bribing_kids
If you have to "bribe" your kids to listen to the babysitter, don't you have a problem as a parent?
2007-04-16 11:02:30 · 7 answers · asked by powhound 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Damn!! you're right!! i'm part of the problem!! but wait til you have kids and you see how easy it is to do. My 3 yr old will grab my leg screaming and won't let me go out the door for work unless i tell her im going to bring her a gumball. i can't deal with this every day, i want to see her happy when i leave. but it is true, most of us behaved with the threat of an as s whoopin over our heads, not the picture of a surprise.
2007-04-16 13:42:21 · answer #1 · answered by Arraya 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, it depends on this is used. If a child can't yet conceptually understand the reasons behind rules and laws of the home, explanation through bribery may be needed early in life.
Ideally, a parent should (and must) help develop the child's sense of morality and community involvement; Eventually, the child should obey laws and rules not because they want a reward, or fear punishment. But rather because they understand the reasons behind these laws, and wish to do a morally right thing
It's quite hard to develop this level of personal morality right away, and early in life bribery may work as long as its slowly weened off. Relying on bribery in some of the older cases shown here, however?
That doesn't help ANYONE.
2007-04-16 18:13:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there's difference between "bribing" achild, and what's doing what psychologists call "shaping behavior". Shaping is more like rewarding good behavior (and in a major way, adults get "rewarded" all of time for "behaving"; it's sort of a weird way of looking at it though... you get "rewarded' for driving properly [maybe reward is the wrong word] by NOT getting tickets or losing your driving priveledges; you get "rewarded " for going to work by getting a paycheck; and just see if you get "rewarded' by your spouse if they get hacked off at you). You have to be very careful with this one though. You don't want to reward just for the sake of avoiding negative behaviors in others (or yourself). This is what it sounds like with the babysitter situation. Reward good behaviors, and the not so good ones disappear pretty damned fast.
2007-04-16 18:14:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes. And the problem will only get worse. These parents are setting their children up to be spoiled, miserable adults. What will happen to them when they are on their own? Their friends, spouses and bosses certainly won't treat them this way. Parents owe it to their children to prepare them to live as adults and this is definitely not the right way.
2007-04-16 18:12:02 · answer #4 · answered by Jensenfan 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
wow. that story is just sickening. I know I got rewards for good report cards, but thats a special thing. not just for behaving yourself. Thats just crazy. Kids need to behave because they want to.
2007-04-16 18:15:08 · answer #5 · answered by past_princess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
o come on, we all have done it. i am a stirct dad but even i say to my boys sometimes
"if you are good today when we go shopping, you can have a sweat"
we all have done it, and to be honest theirs nothing wrong with doing it now and again, of course after a while the need to actualy be punished
2007-04-16 19:06:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i agree with you to many parents don't punish there kids at all they find ease out instead
2007-04-16 20:16:01 · answer #7 · answered by debrasearch 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋