How do I teach my son that God loves him and answers prayer?

Question

My 11 year old son has lost his faith because his grandfather died despite his years of praying for his cancer to be cured. It seems that along with losing his faith, he has lost his joy in the world.

Answer 1

All you can do is pray for your son. The choice is ultimatly his in the end. You could try involving him in some sort of community help program and show him that there are all sorts of people out there who w/o this type of help would have nothing. This is one of the many ways that God moves in the hearts of those who let him. Your son is young and hurting and with your help, this too shall pass.

Answer 2

Speaking from experience...I think my parents' examples helped most (more than their lectures). Does your son hear you pray on a regular basis? Hearing often the humble, heartfelt prayers of a parent is a faith-inspiring thing. If you don't already, you might gather at least once a day as a family to pray, and invite someone else to be voice in the prayer each day (so it's not always the parents praying - but don't force child to pray if he doesn't want to of course).

Also, does your son know you pray even when he's not listeninng? Some of my sweetest childhood memories are of looking for my mom and finding her in some quiet place, kneeling in silent prayer. Your son trusts you. Doubt is normal. As he sees your example of enduring faith, it will leave an impression and touch his heart - whether now or later. God loves him and will help you know what to do as you ask.

Answer 3

The poor sweetie, I lost my PopPop at the same age, also to cancer..... You don't say how recent his loss, but every one has to go through steps in the grieving process, he is at step number 2, which is Anger.
The steps are
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance.
Sometimes step number 2 is aimed at God, sometimes at the deceased.
That he is at step number 2 means that he is starting to work through it, give it time. If it's appropriate, perhaps you may need to call in a grief counselor.
At his age it is hard to understand that even though you pray for something, the prayer is always answered, but it might not be the answer you wanted. It's hard to understand that maybe it was just his time to die, and it's hard to understand that maybe that was the best God could do to be merciful, and end his pain. Try to find examples in your daily life, how God has answered you prayers. Use examples of ways that God has helped you with prayer, and also examples of times that God gave you a different answer from the one you wanted, and how you feel about it, and why you still have faith in God, even though you didn't get the answer you wanted. Don't try to push it on him though, more than anything, give him your love, give him time, and if need be, see if you can give him a little space, if he doesn't want to go to church or whatever because of the way he feels, but if he seems receptive, just try to give him examples when he is open to listening of what prayer has done for you. Please give the little guy a hug for me, and tell him I am sorry he lost his Grandpa, and also sorry for your loss as well...... (I'm not a Christian, but I do believe that prayer can help in alot of ways, but people get disappointed if they expect the wrong things out of it, or expect it to work like magic)

Answer 4

I don't thick you can teach him that, you may have to wait for him to come back of his own accord. Just give him time, we all take different lengths of time to come to terms with death - with cancer deaths and the like it is easy to think that your prayers have gone unanswered, my grandfather died of cancer 2 years ago and none of our prayers appeared to be answered.

I lost my faith after my Great-grandmother died when I was four. I just couldn't understand why someone who was so loving and merciful would take her away from us. I about 11 when I cried so much after being told off for something that I ended up singing whatever words came to mind - it was then that words were but in my mouth that made sense to me for the first time. I suddenly understood and believed again.

Give the child time and remind him that you love him even if he doesn't believe. He'll come around in his own time.

Answer 5

You can tell him that he will see his grandfather again in heaven. Tell him God has taken away all his grandfather's pain and sorrow, and that he is now in such a place of perfect peace and joy- joy unspeakable.
Tell him that we live in a world scarred by sin, and death is the result of this, but that his grandfather is in a place of complete love, and one day all who are in Christ will be together again for all eternity.
God's ways are mysterious, and at times we can not understand why he allows what he does, and blesses the way he does. But we can be sure that God never makes mistakes. But Jesus weeps with us.
I pray that god will bless your little boy and bring him to a place of peace and understanding on this situation.

Answer 6

I'm sorry to hear about his grandfather. It's always hard to lose someone you love like that. I lost my grandmother when I was 11 to a long drawn out disease as well. I can only hope his grandfather went peacefully, my grandmother suffered for days before she died when the doctor removed her life support and starved her.

What helped me along was knowing that my grandmother would always be with me. Sometimes, we can't save someone through prayer because God needs them more. My grandmother is gone from earth, but she's never gone from me.

Bring your son to your church and if you have candles there to light (mine did), have him light one in honor of his grandfather. Let him know that his grandfather will always be with him, always hear him. Since his grandfather is with God, being closer to God will help him be closer to his grandfather.

Again, I'm sorry for your loss.

Answer 7

Answers prayers? If he prays for a horse will he get it? If he prays for his grandad to come back to life will his grandad walk through the door?

Sounds like you made the case for him not to believe in prayer. Try to be a bit more down to earth and realistic. Be Christian not a sower of fairy tales. You are selling Christianity as a magic show instead of a faith. Try reading the Bible, speak to your pastor and then try and give him good Christian guidance.

Answer 8

Brainwashing seems to have done the trick for most God believers. Christianity claims it has all the answers... never mind if they are all the wrong ones entirely.

Answer 9

Tell him that God has a reason for everything, and that his grandfather dies to be in a much better place and that one day he will join him up in heaven. :)

Answer 10

Im sorry for your losses.

Try taking your son to a good priest. One that speaks and relate to kids.