whenever me and my bf have a row, he always makes out like its my fault and i end up aplolgising all the time. i've even started saying sorry after most things i say to him and friends and family. help, serious anwers only is there something wrong with me?!!?
2007-04-16 00:37:35 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
here's an example, if we're out in public and we start a quiet row, i'll smile so we don't get funny looks and it just looks like we're talking but he just accuses me of laughing at him, even though i've explained that to him. how can i explain things so that as a man, he'll understand and it won't sound like i'm moaning
2007-04-17 02:58:54 · update #1
Statistically, I don't think you could manage to be in the wrong ALL the time, lol. So, yeah, it's a perception that you need to adjust!
Just tell him that you've noticed that you're starting to settle for apologizing your way through life and that you realize it's not healthy, and you need to do whatever it takes to learn how to be more realistic and even-handed. If he does not think co-operating with you is worthwhile, it won't be hard to convince yourself to break up with him.
Good thing you noticed it now!! It's a wretched way to go through life! GL...
2007-04-16 00:55:12 · answer #1 · answered by and_y_knot 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been with him? There's nothing wrong with you really...It may be true that its your fault sometimes and you should apologise but its cannot be that its all your fault all the time!!!
I think your bf needs to grow up. He needs to realise that it can be his fault at times too...Have a good talk with him after he has calmed down after a row and go through what happened and analyze whose fault it is...Good luck. Don't give in all the time. He might take advantage of this and blame it all on you as times goes by...
2007-04-16 07:49:13 · answer #2 · answered by Grace 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey...You have low self esteem.You cannot possibly be wrong all the time.Your boyfriend sound's controlling and that may very well be why you feel the need to apologize all the time.STOP don't apologize unless you feel that you have really done something wrong and when your boyfriend does something wrong point it out and make him own up to it.You need to learn how to stand up for yourself you can do it.And if your boyfriend does not want to own up for his actions then maybe you need to re-evaluate your relationship.Good Luck & Best Wishes
2007-04-16 07:46:36 · answer #3 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you happy in this relationship? Is this the way you want to be treated for the rest of your life?
Be more specific in what everyone around you claims you are always wrong. Give us an example.
2007-04-16 07:46:56 · answer #4 · answered by Patty G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't believe that there is something wrong with you. I believe your boyfriend is manipulative. He has the necessity of playing the role of a 'victim' to feel better. So he uses you to feel better. By blaming you for something HE did wrong, he has no responsibility for his act anymore. And by apologizing, you say to him in his subconscious "oh poor boy". Complex of a lack of maternal or paternal love. Or even worse: too much 'love' in his childhood. Emotionally spoiled child.
2007-04-16 07:47:56 · answer #5 · answered by Elaine B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he doesn't love you for who you are, you need to leave him. He will figure out real quick how much he has lost. Don't live the rest of your life this way. You will always be miserable. Get rid of the jerk, if he does not respect you.
2007-04-16 07:43:27 · answer #6 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to figure out if this is the life you really want to live.. are you unhappier more than you are happier? is being apolgetic all the time really that good for your self eesteem..
when i use to fight with my ex he always use to turn it around on me.. even if it was something that he did wrong.. he'd always turn it around on me. .thats not anyway to live..
2007-04-16 07:45:35 · answer #7 · answered by steph 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋