Ok my friends bfs father beat the crap out of him yesterday and his emotions are all over the place and hes was too scared to go ro sleep. So today she chose to go to her riding show when she knew he needed her for emotional support but she went and didnt come home till an hour ago and got mad cuz her ex best friend (shes also his ex gf) called her and told her what a selfish cow she is for doing that. And they got into it and the ex bff told her that she will take care of him and for to just stay away if shes going to just make it all about herself. So she called her bf and started witching at him and the poor guy is black and blue from head to toe with finger marks around his neack from where his dad choked him but she didnt care she just started playing th victim and cussing him out. What is her promblem? What should he do?
2007-04-15 17:31:36 · 14 answers · asked by spayhappy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
He should move on and find a girl who is more caring and compassionate. She'll only end up causing him more heartbreak and wasting his time.
2007-04-15 17:35:07 · answer #1 · answered by Bella-El 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all those riding shows are VERY expensive and must be paid for in advance and they do not give refunds! If her parents paid for the show then it may not have been up to her whether or not she rode today. The shows are also very long and depending on what time she rode she probably wasn't able to get home any sooner than she did. She probably feels really quilty that she couldn't be there today and that is why she lashed out. I am sure that it wasn't something she could control. She was also probably very offended that to find out in her absense her boyfriend called upon his exgirlfriend. So I would say that he has some responsibility in this. Also, why hasn't anyone called the police on his father. Abuse like what you describe should never be tolerated and it should be reported to the police immediately!!! That is what your concern should be not over the friend that you don't think is doing her part when she is probably doing the best that she is allowed to do.
2007-04-15 17:43:19 · answer #2 · answered by Carrie T 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1. he should go to the police and file charges against his father if he hasn't already done so
2. He should call child protective services if he is under 18 and get a safer family to stay with, it will be free
3. if he is over 18 he should find another safe place to stay
like a boarding house or friends place
4. He should not rely on an obvious immature and underage girl to solve his problems for him, he has much more serious fish to fry right now
5. He has stated he cannot sleep because he feels afraid, he does not feel safe. He is not safe.
And he wants to bring someone he supposedly loves there? Is a little girl going to protect him from his dad now? Or is she just going to get beaten up too? He obviously can't protect her. He is being selfish to want her to come into a dangerous situation when HE doesn't have the balls or spine to take care of himself like a man. What is she, his mommy? He is supposed to look out for HER.
If I was her, I would have my parents call the police. I would not go there if he had some abusive out of control parent raging over there!
And I would probably feel bad that he would hate me for calling the police to do what he didn't have the balls to do himself, and address the real problem. She probably knows the only thing she can really do to help is report it and he is telling her not to.
2007-04-15 17:36:34 · answer #3 · answered by julliana 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all, if her bf really is black and blue from head to toe with finger marks around his neck, he should probably try to contact an adult about this; that is child abuse. If he can talk to someone at school about it--maybe a guidance counselor--they can try to get him some help for what's happening to him.
As for the gf, was she competing in the riding show? If so, she might not have been able to get out of it. It was really not her ex bff's job to tell her how she should've handled the situation.
She probably just became very defensive when she was accused of being selfish, and she wrongly took it out on her bf. Her ex bff needs to stay out of the situation, because it is really none of her business how the gf handles the situation.
The gf needs to be there for her bf, and hopefully apologize for cussing him out like that; she can just explain that she got defensive because of her ex bff's accusations.
If she is unwilling to do this, it might be best for the poor guy to dump her, unfortunately.
2007-04-15 17:39:03 · answer #4 · answered by Sammy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh my God,why did the dad do something like that.Did this happen in the UK because the dad would of been locked up
for hitting his child if it happened here.The kids here no that if their parents touch them they can have them locked up.The parents here are to affair to hit because all the child has to do is pick up the phone and the parents are locked up for child abuse.The girlfriend should be ashamed of her self.Why in the world is he with a hor like her.The poor guy is in so much pain and all she can think about is herself.What a greedy
bit ch she is.Tell your friend she is bad news and to get read of her.
2007-04-15 17:59:25 · answer #5 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the show is kinda an important thing if she was in it but if she just went to watch knowing full well her boyfriend is in pain thats kinda insensitive and mean. the poor boy needs some help and she kinda just adds to his pain i say he should have a serius talk with this lady or jus break up with her. oh and i say sue your dad for big bucks and live on your own if your old enough or jus tell the cops.
2007-04-15 17:37:57 · answer #6 · answered by napkin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in line with risk she is, yet I actually have a feeling that she is grieving in her very own way, perchance the domicile carry too many thoughts for her and he or she would not experience waiting to pass lower back. whilst the info do look pointing to the top that she is being egocentric (on account that absolutely everyone needed tochronic to this point), i think of which you may desire to check together with her approximately how she is feeling. She might desire to be hurting interior..... or she might desire to be performing bratty. additionally..... does she have a sturdy relationship together with her siblings? in line with risk she did no longer choose for to work out them the two. It particularly might desire to be something, you may desire to ASK HER. yet do no longer come for the duration of as in case you're blaming her, she will in basic terms get shielding, be tactful. sturdy luck!
2016-10-03 01:29:44 · answer #7 · answered by benisek 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
:S He needs to dump her immediately because OBVIOUSLY she doesn't give a crap about him. As for his abuse situation he needs to let a responsible adult know what is goin on... and stay with a friend so that he won't be near his father. Then the adult will/should call the authorities and he will be in child protection services.
2007-04-15 17:41:28 · answer #8 · answered by boomboombaby 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Rule of life....take care of yourself, then others.
A person that has that kind of crap in their life only brings baggage into a relationship. They cannot expect another to drop everything in order to try and help them. People who do not attempt to try and get out of screwed up situations like that cannot screw up other peoples lives. It is not love for someone to expect that. And, it is not love for someone to screw up their own life to try and help a person that does not help themselves. Why on earth she would be with him to begin with is beyond me. My best friend in junior/high school was beaten violently by her father. But, she worked to change things, get out and have him held accountable for what he did. I had no problem taking time for her. But, if it meant screwing up my own life, then no way. That only adds to the power of the ****** that is causing the problem to start! Sad, but true! Sorry hun...brains have to overcome the heart!
Not to mention...that the only person that can truly help here is a trained and qualified individual. You are blaming his problems on her. She has nothing to do with his problems. She may lend and ear and try to help him (emotionally), but he will only get real help when he gets some balls and stands up to do so!
2007-04-15 17:38:34 · answer #9 · answered by monchicha 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Dump her!! See if you can find him another place to stay till he feels better.....I hope everything works out well
2007-04-15 17:35:50 · answer #10 · answered by Catcanscratch 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋