Am I being unreasonalble or a psyco???

Question

My fella and I have been together for 3years and 2mthsbut he wont commit to me. He stays with me but i pay for everything. Forced him into having a baby with me but we are having trouble conceiving (trying for 2 years). He dont to get married or engaged he has done the engaged thing before and i haven't. I recently found out his sister is pregnant and getting married? Am i being unreasonable to want this or jealious

Answer 1

Asking for a commitment is not unreasonable after 3+ years (although you didn't say how old you are). What's unreasonable is you paying for everything. And don't force him into anything, especially when there is a potential child involved. He may come to resent you and the baby. Take a break and/or move on. Good luck!

Answer 2

I think having a baby with this guy would be a bad idea. He obviously wants different things than you so either try to come to some compromise or go your separate ways. My fiance's brother met someone a few years ago and she got pregnant thinking it would make him stay and they have an on/off relationship that I would not wish on anybody. That poor child has to bear the brunt of it all and neither of them are happy for longer than two months before it all goes wrong again. Don't think a child will solve this because it will not!

Answer 3

How do you force someone to have a baby? I think you need to take one step at a time instead of trying to rush into things. If you have a baby you will end up with a lot more bills to pay because you already said that you pay for everything. You should ask yourself whether you can survive paying all the bills for a new baby and paying the bills for your boyfriend? Only you can make the decision.

Answer 4

It's not unreasonable to want to be married and have a family, but seriously this relationship sounds dead end to me, he won't commit, he won;t make a contribution to the family, you have to force him to have a baby with you??? Sounds like you need help from the Jeremy Kyle show. Honest advice? Leave him and find someone else that wants what you want, a relationship like yours can never work and be satisfying for everyone, can't you see he is using you?

Answer 5

when you are both in a good mood sit down with a bottle of wine, and ask him exactly what he wnts out of this relationship, tell him that as things are, you don't see a future as you don't know where the relationship is going, but for heaven's sake don't push him into things, like having a baby, he will end up walking away men take their time, they get there in the end, but don't push him, it won't work, if he says he thinks things are fine the way they are, you need to decide how you want to handle that, you can either stay put and enjoy time together hoping one day he will want these things, you may even find that you enjoy each other more, or you can walk away, and find someone that does want them, but rushing just makes it all go wrong, you and your partner, should enjoy the peace at the moment, maybe compromise, say in five years we get married and in i don't know, maybe 7 years we have kids, in that time, you can save money, and plan better, if you two split up before then, you have no ties etc

Answer 6

This is a very bad environment to bring a child into. You never want to force anyone to have a child you both should want to do it. But I think the fact that you pay for everything and he does not want to commit is a sign that it is time for you to move on. Do not do things because everyone else is doing them and you think you should be. Give yourself time a good relationship will come around and you will find that you are really ready for it then. good luck!

Answer 7

you want a lot more than this guy wants to give... why are you trying for a baby again with this guy who u said had to be 'forced' into it?
you arent a psycho but u are being unreasonable with yourself, and it sounds like this guy came along wen u wanted all these things and he will do..
you shouldnt force anyone to have a baby or get engaged or married, but the baby is born and im sure he/she is very much loved... but i think u are getting urself in deeper by trying for a second with him...girl, my advice would be to get some counselling as a couple.....

Answer 8

You are not being unreasonable. I would give him an ultimatum...We either get married or it is over. Why are you paying for everything? How did that get started?. This clown is getting away with not having to pay for anything, he wont committ and you want him? First mistake. Your second mistake is trying to get pregnant with a guy who doesn't want a committment and won't marry you. This is rediculous. I would not try to get pregnant with this guy. He may be trying to get out of the relationship because he is giving you mixed signals. Give the ultimatum, if he hesitates and gives you the engagement B/S, end it, throw the bum out and move on. There are plenty of men who would want a relationship with you. My advice, dump him fast and throw him out.

Answer 9

I don't think you are being unreasonable. Did you ever think that maybe he is staying with you because you do PAY FOR EVERYTHING. He might not want a baby because it would take away from him. . . . My first husband was a lot like this. . . . Our marriage only lasted a year and a half. Are you sure this man is the one for you???

Answer 10

I know what your feeling and I think you have every right to feel that way. "Nowadays" it's the norm to live with someone and even have kids w/o being married. I have been with my boyfriend going on nine years now, (but I was still married to a ghost up until 2-3 years ago) I thought he would want to get married by now, but nope. He says, "Why? What's going to be different? Do we want to change what we have?" Makes me upset because I've given him all my good years, I'm getting a little old for looking for someone, I want the security that he will be with me in the long run, most of all, I want him to want me to be his wife. Insecurity issues? Definitely! Because he won't commit! What's wrong with me that he doesn't want to wed me? Is he thinking he's going to upgrade one day soon? I asked a guy friend what he thinks the problem is and he told me....
WHY BUY THE COW WHEN THE MILK IS FREE?!
Meaning we should have waited for the proposal before we moved in together! Hope it somehow helps to know you are not alone.