I am terribly afraid of my loved ones, especially my parents, dying. How can I learn to deal w/this reality?

Question

I always worry about how one day my parents, and loved ones, will die and I won't have them anymore. It really ruins my mood somedays and sometimes I just can't think of anything else. How can I cope with this reality?

Answer 1

having thoughts like that frequently, can be signs of an anxiety disorder, caused by stress. if it continues to bother you some therapy may be help full. anxiety disorders can cause a person to have obsessive thoughts that are very bothersome and can be very difficult to con troll. hope this helps you good luck

Answer 2

Sorry to hear about your mom and your step dad. {{{{{hugs}}}}} I lost my mom 11 years ago. It was hard on me because I lived with her. I got called into work the day she had her heart attack. The call went into 911 less than 15 minutes after I left to go into work. I have pretty much worked through that guilt but it still comes back once in a while. Six years ago, I lost my younger brother to a heart attack. Eight days later, my dad also died of a heart attack. A year and a half ago, I lost my oldest sister. It leaves me and my older brother who is an alcoholic. I am almost 42 years old. I will be honest. Losing a loved one is never easy. I can't tell you how many times I will sit here and just cry. I am not depressed, I just honestly miss everyone. What has got me through is one thing. God doesn't give you anything you cannot handle. He will test you a LOT but if He didn't think you can handle it, He wouldn't give it to you. The best advice I can give you is to just remember to take time for you. Live life to the fullest. And it doesn't mean you are weak if you tell someone you are having a rough day.

Answer 3

Stop being afraid of their dying and leaving you. If you continue with this frame of mind you might die and leave them alone! That would cause them to experience a pain you could only image. Why not let everyone have what they want most, to love, to be loved and to be in each others presence as long as we live.

Enjoy your parents and let them enjoy you. Go grab your camera take lots of pictures, take your parents to dinner, visit them more often, and most of all TALK WITH THEM, Listen and LAUGH. Build memories.

Live in the now. Your parents should be the source of your hope and strength to get you through any sorrow. Come out of the future and journey through your thoughts into the past think of a funny moment in your childhood; I bet your parent's are there! Develop some memories. That's life.

You are not afraid of their dying you are more afraid to live your own life independent of them! Let go of your parents, let them live too.

Let them stand back and watch you live. Try being a part of the living: Bet they will feel your joy. Don't cause them to worry about you. Demonstrate their teaching and love by living. Get a life! Have some wonderful life experiences.

Meet you in peace.

Answer 4

Ever hear of "Recovery"? It is a non-profit, self-help group of people from all walks of life, meeting on a first-name basis only, and discussion their individual fears and what they have done since the last meeting to cope with them. Everyone is in the same boat and no one looks down on anyone else.

See if there is a group in your area. There is a book called "Mental Health Through Will Training," by Dr. Low.
Amazon might have a copy.

http://www.recovery-inc.com/

Mental Health Through Will Training: A System of Self-Help in Psychotherapy As Practiced by Recovery, Incorporated (Hardcover)
by Abraham A. Low (Author

The natural order of life is to lose one's parents. It is not nice, and we miss them. It occurs to me that the "serenity prayer" said by recovering alcoholics applies here:

"God grant me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

Answer 5

i think when you were born your parents celebrated and loved you even though they knew that one day you would die hopefully not before they did. death is a reality, something we know will happen to our family and friends and ourselves sooner or later, yet it is not normal for someone to be consumed and always troubled by it. maybe think about the day you have your own children and how you would want them to feel about death.

Answer 6

Trust in God! I feel the same way sometimes, but then i think to myself, what happens has to happen, there's no way for me to stop it! Its in God's hands and he knows when the time is right! Try living each day as if it is Your last and appreciate your love ones for you might lose them anytime!!!!

Answer 7

either you never experienced someone close die or you witnessed a horrible death, just know that everyone dies, you cant stop it. stop worrying and spend as much time as you can with them and have fun and make good memories you can look back on instead of the thought of their funeral

Answer 8

the way i look at things is you have your loved ones today, thats what counts. i worry when they walk out the door if thats gonna be the last time i see them. i have to keep reminding myself that yes, i will see them again. and eventually it leaves my mind.

as always, talk to your doctor though. antidepressents could help in your case.

Answer 9

i can understand what you mean very well.
i dont wanna lose everybody i love but everybody has to die someday.
and we can learn life is precious when somebody we love dies.
live your life preciously each day !

Answer 10

just tell your self if they GO its ok the lord needs them and they will be lookin over me ask the lord to be a stronger person