Just to clarify, I love my fiance. I want to marry him... but the wedding itself has turned into a monster and I hate it. Every aspect of it seems to evoke some sort of crappy opinion from one person or another... and my intended has the uncanny ability to come up with an opinion weeks after I have asked him for one and made a decision because his first answer was "I don't know... do what you want."
The moral of this story is that I'm starting to feel really guilty about having the desire to just stop planning and maybe not even have the stupid wedding and I just wanted to see if anyone else had felt this way...
2007-04-14 10:49:26 · 21 answers · asked by krystalinereality 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
We can't elope for two reasons #1- he doesn't want to and #2 our parents would be extremely upset and it would be just as much stress as the planning is right now
2007-04-14 10:58:43 · update #1
I hate wedding planning. It's such a big hassle and i'm not all that excited about it. I mean, i am totally in love with my man and can't wait to be his wife, but i'm not a fan of big fancy parties and hate being the centre of attention, so i'm not exactly looking forward ot it as much as i should. I'm really looking forward to my marriage, but not my wedding. Like you, however, our parents would be very upset if we didn't have a traditional wedding in a church and such. *sigh*
2007-04-14 11:19:24 · answer #1 · answered by katskradle 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
When my husband and I got married we had a friend of his family help us put everything together. At first everything went really smoothly with the planning but the time came when she drove me nuts with things like the colors of the bridesmaids dresses and the flowers and so on and so forth. Nothing I chose was to her liking.
My husband was like "honey I'll be happy with whatever you pick out and decide on"
In a subtle way I took things in my own hands and everything went wonderfully. I was right out of high school and we've been happily married for 8 years but if I had it to do over I would have had a small wedding with just close friends and immediate family or heck even eloped to Vegas...lol
Have you contacted a wedding coordinator or have some close family or friends that might be of assistance?
Good Luck!
2007-04-14 11:00:59 · answer #2 · answered by ☼CubsFan☼ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This Site Might Help You.
RE:
Do you or did you hate planning for your own wedding?
Just to clarify, I love my fiance. I want to marry him... but the wedding itself has turned into a monster and I hate it. Every aspect of it seems to evoke some sort of crappy opinion from one person or another... and my intended has the uncanny ability to come up with an opinion weeks after I have...
2015-08-18 19:25:19 · answer #3 · answered by Jenny 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know EXACTLY what you are going through!!!
I cant wait to be married to my man, but this wedding HOOPLA is ridiculous. We wanted to have a small, quiet ceremony so we opted to have a destination wedding down south and only invite our immediate family. In a way its less work and in a way it isnt. Its all just very overwhelming.
And I know what you mean about opinions... I get them flying at me from all directions from family members. I just have to ignore them and do what I want. But its so frustrating to do what you want and then feel guilty about it, and then if you did what others wanted, you wouldnt be happy with yourself!
Its a lose-lose situation. Weddings are ridiculous in my opinion. Its not even about the love or the meaning of anymore. Its all about flowers and invitations and blah blah blah...
I would give ANYTHING to elope, but I cant cuz my parents would go crazy. Same thing as you. I feel your pain, I really do...
Wedding planning is NO fun!! I just keep looking forward to my honeymoon because not only will it be a nice chance to relax with my new hubby, it will also be a way to celebrate all the BS being overwith!!!
2007-04-14 11:15:14 · answer #4 · answered by snailysnal 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I have loved a lot of the wedding planning, I enjoy dealing with the vendors as well as negotiating. Thankfully, anyone who would believe they have any input in this lives far away or are no longer with us. I have not enjoyed some of the panic that has ensued (i.e. no reception site, no one to marry us, etc) but most things are being resolved.
I took my fiance 6 months to come off the "I don't know...do what you want." attitude, but I didn't push him, I didn't complain, he just did. It was annoying and hurtful at times. Just take a break from the planning, it helps.
You've got to make this you and your fiance's big party and focus on the marriage. Congrats!
2007-04-14 11:16:26 · answer #5 · answered by swagov 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They are a pain in the patootie!
I've had three big weddings (all at the insistence of the grooms), and they were all monsters. It's an industry. It's NOT worth it, and you'll hardly remember it anyway. That's where that expensive photographer comes in!
Save the money and make it a great honeymoon! If I EVER get married again (which I doubt), it'll be JP all the way.
2007-04-14 10:53:19 · answer #6 · answered by Bad Kitty! 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I planned my wedding in two months with no one's help. It turned out nicely. I asked my husband nothing except how many people he wanted to invite. He really did not care about the details. It was a small wedding of only 75 people. When it was over, we owed no one and had no regrets. Just keep it simple. You will be happier.
2007-04-14 10:58:12 · answer #7 · answered by OTOTW 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You described exactly what happened as my then-fiancee and I planned our wedding. I live in Colorado, she lived in Arizona. We planned a July wedding in Arizona. We got so many complaints about it, and every time we thought we had addressed all the complaints, my family (I admit it, they were the biggest complainers) found something else to whine about.
So we said, "Screw it" and went to Vegas and got married, which was what she really wanted to do in the first place, and which sounded like a really good idea to me as well.
And, very interestingly, there were absolutely no complaints from anyone.
2007-04-15 03:17:50 · answer #8 · answered by JohnD 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did too. So I took matters into my own hands. My intended and I went to a justice of the peace and got married. Then, 2 weeks later, I plotted and planned a fabulous party for us and invited all the people that were snarling at each other and me and we declared a toast in front of all of them. The toast of course was for a happy marriage and before anyone could really react they were all lifting their glasses!
I had to explain a little of course, and soothe ruffled feathers but all in all, we had the time of our lives, nobody was sent to the hospital over bridesmaids dresses or boutonnieres or any of it.
It really is time we took back our own sanity and stopped trying to please everyone else on that most special day!
Whatever you decide, I wish you the best!
2007-04-14 10:58:55 · answer #9 · answered by Rosanna 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
don't get to mad at you future husband. He understands every girl dreams of a wedding and is trying to give you your dream. I'm in the same boat as him. I don't hate helping to plan my wedding because a coordinator wasn't an option with the budget we have, which means things are tougher.
Take a breath, and a drink, and calm down. There's no way to make everyone happy and you shouldn't try the only one who *needs* to be happy about your choices is you.
2007-04-14 11:18:18 · answer #10 · answered by Chester M 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋