Me and my wife got married 1 1/2 year ago, and we now have a 3 1/2 month old son. Her parents love to visit all the time, but my mother comes around about once a month. My parents are divorced, and have been for 13 yrs. They get along fine now, and my father comes to see his grandson at least once a week. He lives about 30 minutes away from us. Here is the bad part she (my mother) only lives 100 yrds from our house, and only visits once a month. She goes and visits with some friends of hers at least 2 times a week because of there new baby.so what is wrong with her coming to visit her own grandson? i dont know what to do, or should i just let it be. This situation really bothers me and my wife. I have tried talking to her about it. She acts like it's nothing, and blows it off.
2007-04-14 09:11:37 · 11 answers · asked by white_cowboy_1985 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She has came over to pick something up from the house, but she never gets out of the car to come in, and see him while she is there. She always wants me to come, and do things for her like changing the blades on her lawn mower, and putting up light fixtures in her house. Couldn't she visit when i am down there with all of her power to her house off.(which i do to see if she would go down where there is power, but she does not she sits outside with her dog!!!!!!!!!!!!)
2007-04-14 09:31:27 · update #1
I had grand kids about 30 to 45 min. away and I hardly ever saw them. I went every time I was invited, but I never stopped by. For whatever reason, I really felt uncomfortable just stopping by or inviting myself over. It's hard to explain, but I guess I figured if they wanted me to be part of there lives, they would ask me over. I always sent gifts and cards for every event and I still do but now I'm 8 hours from them. Maybe your Mother feels the same way.
2007-04-14 09:26:42 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with ashley since she does live so close try to do a one night week family dinner and invite her over. Or include her in your outings. Maybe that will help. Also stop by her house on family walks. Surrise her she cant tell you that you cant come in. She will realize what she is missing sooner or later. Arguing about it with her will cause unwanted stress and that stress will roll back on the baby. He knows when your happy sad angry mellow or whatever. Just keep your head up and be thankful for the rest of the family that visits.
2007-04-14 16:20:02 · answer #2 · answered by autumnsmommy21 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is somthing only your mother can answer so sit her down and really talk to her if she still doesnt come around then that is her loss i have a grandmother that wants my oldest son everyweekend and hasnt seen my younger 3 in 6 months so i kinda feel your pain good luck
2007-04-14 16:25:39 · answer #3 · answered by kendra_morgan07 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if it is a break you need find a sitter one evening a week to spend time together as a couple. Sometimes a mother can be more helpful of course , but at least it sounds like she is not interfering or meddling with your family which is good.
It`s her decision to be more distant not yours so just leave it alone and try building your family and make it work. Good luck.
2007-04-14 16:17:44 · answer #4 · answered by Heads up! 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is weird, especially since she lives so close to you. It really hurts you, and she refuses to see it. She is just in her own little world and doesn't genuinely try to see how her actions affect people. I'm sorry she is like this. Try talking to her friends, and maybe they can bring the situation up with her. They might have a larger influence on her than you or your wife.
2007-04-14 16:27:08 · answer #5 · answered by cutiedudie2002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it is hard but act like it dosen't bother you. If she is not listening than I would do something like call her last minute for a birthday party or try giving her the cold shoulder. I know thatsounds mean but my mother in law is the same way. I'm not sure if it is working with her or not but it sure makes me feel better.
I hope she comes around and realizes how much it hurts you.
GoodLuck!
2007-04-14 16:18:05 · answer #6 · answered by Chris 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she doesnt want ya'll to feel like she's always imposing since she is so close. Or scared that you'll start asking her to babysit all the time or something. If you tried to talk to her about it and she see's no wrong with it, then don't sweat it , after all it's her loss that will come back to bite her in the booty one day.
2007-04-14 16:16:18 · answer #7 · answered by whitebeanner 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, it sounds like you cannot do anything more than you already have done. You have already talked to you about it. Your son will notice when he gets older and may question her. It is her loss. Pray for her not to miss out on her own grandson versus her friends baby. For now, try not to let it bother you. It is her loss. Congratulations on your new family.
2007-04-14 16:18:20 · answer #8 · answered by Stephanie F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that you should talk to your mom and see whats going on and let her know how you feel. maybe she has something against your wife. the best thing to do is hear it from your mom because no one know exept her! ;)
2007-04-14 16:16:16 · answer #9 · answered by angelkitten1211 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my mother would come round to mine but wouldnt let me or her grandchild round hers. i couldnt explain to my child and she wouldnt so now i dont talk to her.
2007-04-14 16:15:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋