Is it better to have an open relationship with your teen...?

Question

I mean a relationship were they tell you they are going to do things you really do not want them to do. Like going out to drink alcohol with other minors - but you set some of the rules. My daughter told me she choses to tell me and if she wanted, could lie to me instead. I believe honesty is essential but can being this open be a bad thing too?

Answer 1

I'm a teen and i don't really tell my parents that what my friends and I do. But you sometimes have to just have faith in your child. Now is the point in time that you think about what you have taught your child. If you taught them the rights and wrongs in life, you shouldn't worry that much. Now back to the question, it could be bad if you take it too far. If she trusts you enough to tell you, you should not over react to something that might of happened. If you do, she will probably think that she will not be able to tell you what happens from then on. So, I think its good to know what she's doing but don't take it too far.

Answer 2

I'm confused by your question, because it's illegal for minors to drink, and if she should get into trouble, some states are prosecuting the parents as well. If you want an open relationship with her where she does whatever she wants and you know about it but don't say anything, then you're not a mother, you're a friend, and not a very good friend at that. When she tells you she can lie to you if she wants, it sounds like she is challenging you to tell her no. Believe it or not, kids (even teens!) need to know that there are limits to their behavior and that their parents care enough to forbid them from doing things. Of course they get angry, but they also feel a sense of security because they know their parents love them enough to do and say the hard things.

Answer 3

It is never a bad thing to be open with your children at any age, especially your teenagers. I raised two boys and they have always been very open and honest with me about everything. If it was something i disagreed with they knew that if they went ahead and did those things that they would be forced to deal with the consequences. As adults they are now my best friends.

Answer 4

any relationship demands time and for the two to be prepared to commit. as a replace of being mad because of the fact she lied to you, make an effort to understand why she lied to you in the 1st place. you may ought to offer her greater area, as a woman gets older she will possibly no longer want to be smothered by ability of her mom.... and in step with risk with that supply her greater freedom and greater of an oppertunity to particular herself and greater probable open as much as you. She won't pass to you along with her issues in case you get upset along with her for some thing that she says... incredibly in case you punish her. at some point she'll understand which you're merely attempting to assist her, yet for now she sees you as being somebody that gets in the way of the relaxing issues that she desires to do, somebody which will reprimand her for what she has performed incorrect. each so often this is demanding to open as much as human beings, even if if that individual would be your individual mom. i'd propose possibly giving her slightly greater area, and in all risk some greater freedoms, yet additionally, in case you gave her greater responsibilites, she could additionally open up. She'll sense such as you at the instant are not treating her like a splash woman, and which you spot her as a youthful, autonomous women human beings, or a minimum of the flair that she has. She does not want to be taken care of like a toddler, and mutually as you may continuously think of of her as your toddler, she remains growing to be up.

Answer 5

no matter what shes going to find a way to drink if she really wants to. i know i dont listen to my parents when they tell me to stay sober. But i think if you jsut let her drink, it would work quite well. But yous til ahve to watch, amke sure she isnt an alcoholic. maybe like once maybe twice a month, let her go out and have ome fun

Answer 6

as a teen i personally would not tell my parents, but would want them to trust me to not be involved with that stuff. I think if my mom knew too much about my personal life it would be annoying - she would worry about me, and have huge talks with me and stuff like that. i mean really, do you even tell you mom or dad everything?