Would you feel heartbroken if you were really attracted to someone and they were not interested in you back?

Question

There is a new guy who works at my job. He's been there now for a month and he became attracted to me. I was not attracted to him at first, but once he started showing interest in me I started to develope some very strong feelings for him. Just as soon as I developed these feelings for him he just completely flips the scrip on me. He revealed to me that he is no longer interested in me anymore. I am very hurt over this.even though we've known each other for only a short amount of time. His reason for not being interested in me anymore is because he says a don't have a great figure. Although I know he is shallow it still hurts that he is no longer interested in me. This always happens to me. Every single time that I become interested in someone they loose interest in me because of shallow reasons. This makes me feel hopeless and it makes me feel like I am not worthy of loving and that I will be alone forever. If you were in my situation, what would you do?

Answer 1

No, I wouldn't be heartbroken, everyone is different and people have there own likes and dislikes so big deal the dudes not interested in me, I'm not going to die, life goes on. People always dwell on things like that and it stops them from moving ahead for a long period of time (with some people) life is too short to stay in the moment.

Sure you might feel a little something about it but the best thing to do is get over it and move on.

Chow.

Answer 2

re-evaluate why your attracted to these guys, you might be as shallow as they are, and you dont know it. have you done the same thing to some other guy? i know physical attraction is a must , but maybe some people can look past some imperfections and find the real person. if the reasons are shallow, then its not worth pursuing anyway. you have to distinguish ego from reality, and maybe your setting your priorities on the wrong level. the not worthy feeling could be disappointment that you cant have what you want. im being blunt because ive gone thru all this before. you also have to see the difference between a friend and a potential lover, they are not the same. i found this out after trying it a few times. you look at a person one way, and now your looking at them another way. you used to have fun with this person because of no commitment, and now, instead of having fun, your having issues over what time to have dinner, you have to do it together you know, and all the rest of the crap that comes with it. dont be in such a hurry, someone will come around thats right for you. i let the ones that were right go for other reasons, most of them shallow. it took me a long time to find the difference between love and infatuation. dont let this happen to you

Answer 3

I don't know if you are neccesairly heartbroken but rather you have a bruised ego? Regardless, the guy is a jerk and I'm glad you recognize it. He may very likely be trying to get back at you for not being attracted to him in the first place, hence bringing up the figure thing.There are a few ways to go about this, you could and should follow your instincts, you didn't like the guy in the first place, and only changed your feelings after he showed you interest. You could fix whatever your figure 'problem' is, you could make your better qualities the focus of a guys attention. For example, if you have a great sense of humour you could crack him up with jokes. And lastly, don't waste a single moment of time on the superficial ones, you could have spent that time pampering yourself.

Answer 4

Make it a point to keep a confident grin on your face!,This will not only make you feel happier,it will make that loser wonder if he is as cool as he must think he is.The smile\grin is known for enhancing our looks,and when you look at your beautiful self in the mirror think about the fact that true beauty is within us all,love takes time,even after you find it we all need to keep working on it,and it begins with self love.Any guy that is as shallow as you mention is no doubt not worth the time and trouble that he would cause you in the long run.Don't be downhearted,patience WILL pay off in the long run,in the meantime get to know yourself,and, write down in a personal journal what you would really like your mate to be like,looks and all...Sincerely,Sha

Answer 5

If i was in your situation yeah i would be hurt, and yeah it might take me awhile to forget the shallow stuff that he had said to me, but if i was you i would just forget about this dude and move on. I know that it might be hard on you to do this, but there are more guys out there. some day you will find that one person that wants to be with you and treats you with respect and loves you for the person that you are and not what he wants you to be and you will be happy that you let this shallow imature guy go, because if it wasnt for him you wouldnt have found this new person. listen hun, some people come into your life and stay and others will come into your life and leave but the ones that leave they will open new doors for you. some guys are imature and it takes them awhile to grow up, but dont rush love, you dont want to be with someone that said things about you that will just make you feel bad about yourself. hold you head up high and give it time trust me you will find someone sooner or later.

Answer 6

Have a look at the title of your question again, i think everyone has gone through that, its life. Forget about him, easy to say, but hard to do, i know. Also, if you work with him it can make life hell, because you have to see him everyday. My advice would be to ignore him, then he will wonder why your doing that. And to look at it realistically, if your not happy with your figure, then do something about it, start going to the gym or playing sport, you will look and feel better in yourself. You say you don't feel worthy, that's because your not happy with yourself, so get out there, turn it around and you will feel worthy and happy! Good luck with it :-)

Answer 7

Been there before.Yes some men are shallow. I know people tell you to accept yourself. But the question is are you shallow ? If you said the men you are attracted too tend to put you down because of the way you look then is time to look the opposite. They might feel the same way too.

Answer 8

It isn't your figure, and he has no business making you feel badly. Be glad he is history. Next, work on how you feel inside. When you feel attractive on the inside it shows on the outside. Someone's figure has nothing to do with it.
You will meet someone who isn't shallow so don't settle at any point out of fear of being alone. It isn't all that bad to be alone anyway you look at it.

Answer 9

Same exact miserable situation! I thought i wrote this at first...It is so hard to deal with "our" problem cause we see the person every day. I am trying to concentrate on my job for now and totally ignoring him, hoping that time will heal my wounds...PS, all the other guys at work are after me and i am so not interested! Life is not fair. But i wish you luck, better than mine anyway...

Answer 10

if i were in your situation screw the guy, i would actually be thankful that i know now how shallow he is , before i even make or give him something he does not deserve!
i feel that too actually i feel that now , just because we have high standards and that this men dont meet them is really annoying and stressful
so i just do understand that before i could love somebody else i need to love myself first, and that men are not the solutions to my self worth, and that you just havent met the one, the one that would understand you and love you and accept who you are and that youre still in the quest and still in the journey of discovery.
i do know its just words when they tell you that you are worth loving, best to do is to believe that indeed you are worth it.and that we have always been alone, and unless you dont appreciate the fact of your individuality then you cannot be happy, you need to love yourself first, to try to understand it, and dont even rely on men to tell you who you should be and what you should feel , they just dont have the right!