Mormon Marriage Stereotyping?

Question

I'm just wondering what is the real Mormon's pov of marriage and what's it about. Do Mormon men have more than one wife or is that a horrible misconception media places on Mormons? I'm not a Mormon myself but I'm sorta of curious about this stereotyping the media does and what they actually think.

Answer 1

It's a misconception. Any, and I hope I am clear when I say ANY... member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints who practices polygamy in the present day is excommunicated from the church.

In 1998, President Gordon B. Hinckley made the following statement about the Church's position on plural marriage:
"This Church has nothing whatever to do with those practicing polygamy. They are not members of this Church. . . . If any of our members are found to be practicing plural marriage, they are excommunicated, the most serious penalty the Church can impose. Not only are those so involved in direct violation of the civil law, they are in violation of the law of this Church."

Answer 2

As has already been said The Church does not practice polygamy and even when it was practiced, over 150 years ago, fewer than 2% of the members in the church actually were asked to practice it.

When it was practiced you could not just go out and decide that you wanted an extra wife and then go find one and get married. It was a calling issued to a couple by their priesthood leader. The husband AND wife were called in and asked if they would be willing to practice polygamy and if either of them had a problem with the idea then the couple was thanked for their time and sent home to continue their normal lives.

I have heard several reasons for why it was practiced but nothing that I would classify as more than a rumor. So currently the best answer I can give you for why it was practiced is to study the Old Testament and find out why Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, and many other biblical prophets practiced Polygamy.

Answer 3

To add to what has already been said: Mormons, in principle, believe that the concept of plural marriage is okay, provided each case has God's special sanction (through the prophet). Polygamy is not something that was ever generally allowed, like it is in Islam. Men couldn't just decide to have another wife and go and find one.

Of course, there are no cases, these days, where God sanctions plural marriage, because God revealed that it was no longer to be practiced.... I believe things will change again in the Millennium.

I've often fantasized about who I would pick for a sister wife (since the first wife always gets to say yes or no). Hmmm, maybe one of my sisters, or my best friends. I've told my husband that if ever I should die before him, I'll give him a list of points that my new sister-wife must have. After all, she'll be part of my family for eternity!

Answer 4

It is true what most of the people said on this subject, but we don't think that sex is the only way to create spirit children. That is a very big fallacy. We do believe in marriage for time and eternity. This is done through the temple ordinances. You can have a civil marriage, and then later go through the temple to be sealed for time and eternity.

To me, it makes me happy to know that I'll be with my family forever, that the man I love will be with me even after death. I won't be alone, I won't just be in heaven without my loved ones.

Polygamy is a very misunderstood concept. Most think that we were practicing it so the men could have more "fun" if you will. That wasn't it at all. It was a commandment from God at the time. If you read the history of this nation, during this time, there was war. Men were taken away from their families to fight. A lot died in wars, leaving behind children and women who couldn't support themselves. The laws of the land were such that a woman was unable to own land. That would mean that if her husband died, she would be left with no land, no home, no nothing. So plural marriage was a way for the women to keep the land and homes they had, without having to give it over to someone else.

Also, a lot of the women that were in plural marriages didn't live with the husband. They had separate dwellings, and it was a marriage more of words then principle.

One of our articles of faith says- We believe in being subject to kings, presidents, rulers, and magistrates, in obeying, honoring, and sustaining the law. So, part of the problem was that there was a law passed that no one was allowed to practice polygamy. That sort of put a kink in the works, so to say. So what do you follow? We believe in following the law, but then God gave this commandment- so which do we follow?? Well, that question was asked to the Lord by a prophet and the answer was given to discontinue polygamy. That didn't mean that the women that were in polygamist relationships were left out in the cold, it just meant that, by law, only one marriage was acceptable. They were allowed to stay in those relationships until death. That way the women and children were cared for. But no more plural marriages were performed.

The groups that do believe in polygamy still aren't part of our church. They may call themselves FLDS, but they have splintered off of us. Like most have said, any person found to practice polygamy now is excommunicated. This isn't seen as a light sin, it's a big one!

Here is a site that tells what we believe about marriage, dating and also polygamy.

Answer 5

Please allow me to clarify an important item of business about polygamy and Mormons.

President Hinckley, our prophet, has said (paraphrased), "There is no such thing as a Fundamentalist Mormon and one that practices polygamy. Any Mormon the world over found to be practicing plural marriage will be excommunicated."

Any Mormon wherever the residence may be does not practice polygamy. Yes, this stereotype lives on and will be forever spread, but you have read it from one that knows.

Marriage to the LDS membership is a sacred covenant made between one man and one woman before God--regardless if it is a civil ceremony or a sealing ordinance in one of our holy Temples.

The media loves to get on the bandwagon and perpetuate this stereotype for the express purpose of gaining readership. You may wish to watch the PBS special on 30 April and 1 May about "The Mormons," a documentary produced by a non-Mormon having talked with countless people in Salt Lake and elsewhere. I haven't seen it, but look forward to its viewing.

I'm glad you asked the question and am happy I was able to answer in truthfulness.

Answer 6

The mainstream Mormon Church in Salt Lake City no longer practices polygamy for this life. However, if a man's wife who he has married in the temple passes away and he marries another woman in the temple, he will have both as his wives in the Celestial Kingdom for eternity. Therefore, Mormons still believe in the principle of polygamy...they just gave it up as a practice for this life for political reasons. The section in their scriptures which teach polygamy, Doctrine and Covenants 132, is still there.

Answer 7

The media and non-mormons in general usually bring up the polygamy issue. It has not been practiced officially since 1870, and marriage to one man/one woman is encouraged. Marriage is also considered not just a lifetime commitment, but for all time and eternity. Love is forever - sounds cool, no?
The church strongly opposes gay and lesbian lifestyle as sinful, and homosexuals are NOT actively proselytized.
Also, the woman, according to Gordon Hinckley's latest General Conference address stated a mans' wife is his most precious "Possession". Not mate or partner, but property.
Accordingly, polygamy is still doctrinal, but only in the afterlife, where all priesthood holders (men only) must enter plural marriages in order to become gods themselves. Women get to "beget" spirit children for all eternity. Since mormons also believe that this can only be done by sexual intercourse and a resulting pregnancy, you can see where this is going.
Finally, women are revered for motherhood, but not for leadership, entrepreneurship, or independence, but will be selected to be Nursery Leaders for as long as they can handle it.
Naturally you won't hear this from the missionaries, since they are either unaware of the church's overall teachings, or don't care. If you care to be a mommy for the rest of your life and beyond, mormonism is for you. And Valium, Welbutrin and Xanax.
One final issue: Name one Famous Mormon Woman, or a famous mormon work of art or music. Google it really hard.

Answer 8

Yes, the media stereotypes us like that, Mormons do not enter into plural marriages.
One man One women, for Eternity.

Oh, by the way, We prefer to be know as LDS, or members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints.

Answer 9

Real Mormons (LDS) do not have more than one wife. That is just a really bad misconception.

http://www.lds.org/library/display/0,4945,105-1-11-1,00.html

That will explain most of our beliefs about how family, marriage, etc. should work. It is titled "The Family: A Proclamation to the World". Hope this will help you clear up your questions.

Answer 10

No one can be a Mormon and have more than one wife. The media love sensational news so they group so-called "Mormon Fundamentalists" like Warren Jeffs in with the Mormons. Mormons believe that marriage can be for eternity and exists between one man and one woman.