please answer if your mom and dad both worked and ...?

Question

you are raised by some one else like grantparents and babysitters etc. how is your relationship with your parents?did you feel loved specially with your mother? and are you close with them when you are all grown up?
thanks for any input.

Answer 1

I was raised by older sister and brother. My dad left and my mom had to work. As I've grown older, I have a better relationship with my parents. I can see they were only trying to make a living to take care of me.

Answer 2

I was the caregiver is this situation...a nanny for a young girl who had two parents with very demanding careers. She had had a nanny with her since she was two, all the way through high school. While her father passed away while she was still young, she and her mother have a very strong, very close relationship but when she was still a child it was tough. She often felt as if she had to compete with her parent's jobs to get attention and often had a tough time when a nanny left. I have to say that the key to the situation is twofold...one, the parents have to be sure to put out the effort at making and maintaining a strong realtionship with the child. Work has to take a back seat every so often and family time should be a reagular part of the schedule...even if it is just 15 minutes before bed and an afternoon out on the weekend. The other important part of the equation is the communication between the parents and the caregivers. Everyone has to be on the same page or it will be tough on the child. By making sure everyone follows the schedule, uses the same or similar discipline, etc there is lest adjustment for the child when he/she goes from caregiver to parents and back. Plus, the child knows that things will always be the same in some way..especially important.

Answer 3

Ever since I was a baby (I am 15 now) my parents both worked and their jobs were very time-consuming. Twelve hour work days were normal for them both because they own their own businesses and are very high ranked. They didn't have a way or enough time to take care of me, so I moved in with my Grandparents. I rarely saw my parents, and when I did, it was not for a long time. When I was littler, I couldn't really comprehend what happened, although my Grandparents made me know that nothing was my fault. When high school rolled around, I moved back with my parents. It was totally weird. I didn't feel like I knew them at all, and honestly, they really are not good parents. I'm not close with them at all, and they still work their same jobs. Now it's only different because I am old enough to stay home alone and responsible enough to get myself to and home from school. I think their schedule ruined our relationships for good, but the bond between me and my Grandparents are extremely strong. I'm thankful for that because most kids don't have that. It's really more of a mixed emotion type of situation, but I don't think I would have my parents stay home and have different jobs if I could choose.

Answer 4

Well my dad was barely in my life, not because of work just not there. My mom worked a 8 hour day. I was home with my grandma and uncle. We actually lived upstairs from my grandma until I was 12. There was a point when my mom worked two jobs so it was like we never saw her. When I was young maybe 5 or 6 I didn't understand why my mom had to work but as I got older it was all clear. My relationship with my mom is great. I never felt that she didn't love me. Now that I'm a mom I always call her or go by for some advice.

Answer 5

Both my parents worked from the time I was a newborn until I was 6. I was with my grandmom and grandpop most of the day until I was old enough to go to school. During this time I was closer to my grandmother than my own mother because my mother couldn't be bothered with me. So now that I have a daughter of my own, she dotes on her and spoils her rotten I guess to soothe her own guilt for neglecting me.

My mother was a stay at home mom for 3 years after my brother was born, but then went back to work when I was 9, working for my father in his kitchen remodeling business. So from the time I was 9 until I left for college at 18 I pretty much ran the house. I learned how to cook because most nights my folks wouldn't get home until after 7 p.m. I had to grow up fast during those years (my grandmother had died when I was 7 so I couldn't call her for help). Am I bitter? Yes, but I am not going to make the same mistake with my 5 year old daughter. I have to work to make ends meet but once I pick her up I devote most of my time to her.

And just so no one thinks that I am just a teen or a young 20 something, I am a 39 year old married woman. My relationship with my mother is ok, but we aren't close and probably never will be.

Answer 6

Mine both did and I am very close to my mom, always was. Also I think (well in my case) you have working husbands that do a lot more parenting than fathers did when i was younger. Which is a great plus if mom works too and even compared to if one parent works and one is home the whole time, I would rather have the balance of both parents working and both active in raising the kids. (and the housework)

Answer 7

Both my mom and dad worked at different points in my life. I was not raised by anyone but them, even though I did stay with a babysitter while they worked. I have a great relationship with both them.

Answer 8

Both my parents were busy when I was little, and my sister raised me and watched me. My dad always stayed busy wth work and my mom got lazy and never did anything and wouldnt pay attention to me...my sister was in her teen years and didnt want to bother with me as much so I kinda raised myself. I dont really feel loved with either parent. But i dont think it is just because they werent around (my family has other problems) I am not really close with my parents or my sister, and I dont really feel bad about it or anything.

Answer 9

My dad truck drove, my mom was working at our school and then hung out with her friends. Grandma raised us. I didnt have problems or realized i had problems till i got older. I and saw how other people were with there kids. My parents never encouraged me, never was around too, my parents i feel don't love me, all they care about is themselves/ yet i've spent my whole life trying to get a "I'm proud of you" out of them...and it's never happened. They are too wraped up in there own drama

Answer 10

My mother didnt start working untill she seperated from my father when i was 11. I was the oldest and i practically raised my younger brother. I never really felt loved by mother only becuase her actions werent exactly loving. Im not incredibly close to her now but i dont hate her, she is my mother regardless. Im closer to my father though.