I have a lot of bitterness and resentment toward my ex-husband's sisters. During our marriage, he focused on them and their lives and not me. Now, they do not care for him and his life is messed up.
His youngest sister lives overseas and he really pushed her to come here to have her baby. She never did. He constantly was in touch with her when she was pregnant and knew every detail of her pregnancy.
He also focused on his middle sister's marital problems. Her husband had hit her and he tried to get her to leave her marriage.
I feel its partly because focused on them that our marriage broke. His family is not in touch with me now at all. I feel bad because of his focus on them, our marriage broke and their lives went ahead.
I was staying with my daughter a few weeks ago and my mother-in-law said that because of me being there, my youngest sister-in-law did not want to come from overseas to visit. I left so now she can plan her visit.
2007-04-13 02:20:59 · 8 answers · asked by Stareyes 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
i suppose that anyone in this situation would have felt a little left out by their husband.
if there is ever next time, LOOK CAREFULLY before you get married.. i imagine he always had a weird attachment and involvement with his sisters... it didn't just begin when you were married.
people don't normally change their stripes after saying "i do".....
i think it's going to take you time to get past this. sometimes we have to try and feel a forgiveness within ourselves, then go forward with life. i hope everything works out in yours.
2007-04-13 02:32:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best way to handle this is to just let your husband and your daughter deal with them. They are not going to be receptive to anything you say, whether relevant or not! It sounds like your ex's family has a lot of problems...the important thing for you is to focus on your kids! If you were at your daughter's house, then your MIL really has no right to ask you to leave....that would have been your daughter's place! I give your credit for being the better person, but you're letting these people walk all over you....still...first it was taking your husbands attention away from you and your kids...now they are trying to control when you see your kids.....next time you're at your daughters and something like this occurs, tell your mother n law when you are planning to leave and they can schedule their visit around that.....you no longer have to put your life on hold for them! What goes around comes around, and they will get what's coming to them one day! Just focus on finding happiness in your life and don't dwell on the past!! As far as your ex is concerned, I'd try to be friends with him for your kids sake, but the good thing is you never have to have envolvement with his family again!!!
2007-04-13 03:23:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Coming from someone who has been in the same situaton, the best thing for you to do, is tell them how you feel. You can only keep your feelings and emotions bottled for so long before you erupt and things get really nasty. The best thing is to tell her how you feel and ask what the problem is. They might not be aware of what they are doing when it comes to this. Just sit down and talk to her and let her know what your feelings are on the subject.
2016-05-19 16:06:54 · answer #3 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not accountable for other peoples actions, but you are accountable for your own.......
Resentment and bitterness are non productive.....
Forgive everyone including yourself for mistakes of the past, knowing you have learned from them and go on with your life a better person for it. There is no reason for you to rearrange your life to fit into these other peoples emotional dramas...In the future plan your visits in harmony and carry through with them as planned. Let others deal with the drama they produce in their own way.
2007-04-13 02:41:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you have to focus on you. they already hurt you and try not to give them the power to continue to hurt you. there is no reason. you have to be in control of yourself. don't let them have control over you. sure, they messed things up in your life, but, it's only you who can fix it. if they bother and hurt you so much stay away from. get on with your life and try not to live in the past. start a new path that works for you. good luck.
2007-04-13 03:37:26 · answer #5 · answered by try 2 help 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like a case of not wanting the same things
find someone who does want the same things out of life and marriage
2007-04-13 02:25:34 · answer #6 · answered by FOA 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgiveness. It is the cure for resentment and bitterness.
2007-04-13 02:24:39 · answer #7 · answered by Roma 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Igonore the person dont pay them any mind
2007-04-13 02:51:32 · answer #8 · answered by Sexy Z 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋