This may sound downright wrong but I think its my only chance..?

Question

My bf and I have been trying for a baby for 2 years..I've been to the DR and everything is fine with me.He refuses to go and make sure he is able to have children.I know something has to be wrong and we are REALLY wanting them this year because we plan to be married.
The thing I have been thinking about is possibly going behind his back and getting pregnant by another man and telling my bf its his..if my bf cant make babies for me somebody has to right?

I know it sounds REALLY wrong but Im desparate to be married AND pregnant(get the best of both worlds).
Please no rude answers..

Adoption is NOT an option for me..It has to be mine..Thanks!

And I want it to be my bf's too but if he's not willing to find out what he can do to be more productive,then what can I do?

And another thing..Im NOT in any way shape or form trying to trick ANYONE into marrying me..HE asked ME thanks.

Answer 1

that's sounds wrong but i understand
u want a baby and a husband
but here's how u might get catch suppose Ur bf knows he can't have kids what would u say it was a miracle
or suppose he finds out u cheated u would be left alone without a husband
or suppose u have a miscarriage god 4bid what will u do cheat on him again
THINK ABOUT UR ACTIONS BEFORE U DO THEM AND WHO THEY MIGHT BE HURTING

Answer 2

You don't need to get pregnant by another man. If you love your man enough to marry him faithfully, don't do that to him. This is not at all meant to be rude, but it's a little selfish. And you'll hate hiding that secret, that's how people end up on Maury. You'll know it deep down it's someone else's but your bf won't, and it'll kill ya.
I was with my man for 4 years before we finally conceived. I really thought I wasn't able to have babies and I was scared to death! Finally, I stopped thinking about it, and we just had fun having sex instead of trying to get pregnant. Finally I was, and thinking in the same context after the baby's birth that I would go back to not being able to get pregnant right away, I'm pregnant again, lol. This one was an accident but none-the-less I don't regret it at all!
If you love the family you are about to begin, you will be patient. Things happen for a reason. The right time for you to be pregnant is probably in the very near future. Don't try so hard. Who knows maybe you'll even get pregnant a few months from now and will have twins or MORE! Maybe god's waiting for the right time... be patient! You'll be happy you were...!

---Mommy of beautiful 9 month old and 5 months pregnant again!

Answer 3

You know it's wrong to do and you don't need anyone to tell you something you already know. Try feeding him more nuts as this can help in the production of sperm. There are some other food that are said to help but I can't remember what they are. You will have to search the net for them. Make sure he wears boxer shorts instead of undies as this will keep the sperm at a lower temp which keeps them alive. No hot tubs excesive heat to them, limit the alcohol as that can kill off sperm. If you can't get him to go to the doc then treat it like he has a problem and get him to do all this saying it helps with the quality don't tell himit's because you think he has a problem. The most fertile days are two days before ovulation and the day of ovulation so before these days don't have sex for 3 days as this will increase the quanitity of the sperm. Make sure you lay down for half an hr after you have sex as this will help gravity do it's work. If all this fails then you have to talk to him about what is on your mind and how badly you want a baby. If you are going to get married then you need to talk to him about all this stuff otherwise your marrige wont last. If he loves you he will do what he can to help. I wish you all the best and I hope this has helped.

Answer 4

I do not think you want to start a marriage off with lies and trickery. No, it is a bad idea. You may want to put off the wedding until your b/f agrees to testing if having a child is that important to you. I would not trick him or have him raise another man's baby. I would get premarital counseling so that your marriage has a chance in hell of surviving. Usually you want a job with good benefits, three month's salary in the bank, a home with a yard, a great relationship, and an agreement on how many kids you will have and how you plan to raise them. If you are thinking about tricking him out of desparation, maybe he needs to understand how important a baby is to you. Maybe you and he are not on the same page and might want to take a step back and look at whether marriage is a good idea. Either leave him or have him get tested, but don't pull a Jerry Springer on him. I am sure you are not that kind of girl.

Answer 5

I like how you're conveniently ignoring all the terrible flower power pop bands of the 60's and beyond. All the terrible disco artists, and the gag inducing hair bands of the 80's. And lest we forget the 90's which produced such classic artists like The Backstreet Boys, 98 Degrees, LFO, NSYNC, etc. More people care about good music than you think, or are willing to believe. And they're seeking it out. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I can't imagine that you're looking very hard for anything if this is the opinion you have about today's music. I find good new artists on almost a weekly basis, because I use the internet and google things. If you're interested, here's some great record labels with good recent artists on their palate. Young God Sacred Bones Cuneiform Pale Noir Tee Pee Matador Alternative Tentacles Fat Possum Ipecac

Answer 6

There really might not be anything wrong with him. I have been checked to and everything is fine with me I also have been pregnant two times by diff rent people. Now I cant get preg My husband didn't want to do a test than Finlay he did. The doc told him that everything was OK with his sperm test. I didn't believe my husband I wanted to here it my self. I was sure it was him that had the problem since I got preg twice before on birth control. Finally I maid him get a copy of the test and real everything was OK with him now I just feel like an idiot. Maby he is OK just give it more time. Tell him how much this means to you. I understand your fusterstion just try to give it time.....I know how hard it can be im gong through the same thing right now. Best of luck!

Answer 7

OMG you can't be serious. Listen to what you are saying. How old are you?? I'm not trying to be rude, just realistic.

You are proposing having sex with someone else... SEX... with someone ELSE. Unprotected sex at that. That's not healthy, let alone any moral issues. You could get a disease.

You can't start your marriage off with a lie like that. A friend of mine got pregnant by someone else while she was in a long term relationship and told her bf that it was his. She lives with that guilt and shame EVERY DAY. The "baby" is now 8 years old. Imagine how devastating to both the child and father if the truth got out? Now imagine my friend torturing herself daily for this lie she's lived for several years. Don't do this to yourself.

Marriage is a HUGE step. Certain things should be addressed before walking down that aisle. Finances, religion, children...to name a few. Couples must be on the same page with certain things or marriages are doomed to fail. Not that you have to agree on everything, but you have to at least come to an understanding that you can both live with. Something is going on with your bf that he won't have these tests. He's either hiding something or he's afraid to know the results. Either way, you can't start your marriage off that way.

If you can't see yourself married to a man who is infertile, then knowing your fiance's status is critical. You'll have to put your foot down on this one or walk away. As harsh as that sounds, it's better than starting off a marriage with lies and deceit.

Maybe you could talk to a therapist to help sort out your feelings and help you find the strength to do the right thing for you. Good luck.

Answer 8

Dear desperate -mama,

You neeeeed to see a professional counselor and have htem talk your bf into getting checked. You also should see a fertility specialist who can give you some adivce. I have know couples try for years and years and then one passionate sex episode on teh beach in teh carribean did it! Try to relax and love him and be passionate and try new positions. Stay healthy and make sure your at your "healthy" wieght, eat right, and dont forget folic acid. As far as "going behind his back", well Ill tell you what I would tell my girlfriends, sure you can do it, and maybe you wil get pregnant, but everyday for the rest of your life you will not be the same woman, you'll look your baby in his/her face and feel sad and ashamed, and your baby will sufefr, you will be depressed and ashamed throughout your entire marriage. You are on the heels of your future, and although I feel where you are coming from, lying and cheating will never make you feel good, about yourself, your baby, or your marriage. You'll never forget it, at your babys first step, to his first date, to graduation, marriage, and your grandchildren, will all be a constant reminder of that one foolish days so many ages ago. If nothing works with the fertility specialist, artificial insemination is an option or even adoption!! Think about it.

Answer 9

If you want to lie to your BF for the rest of your life that is your problem but don't bring an child into it. I would tell him that if does not get check you will not marry him. How would your child feel if 15 years later he or she finds out that he is not the biological father. If you are really thinking of doing this then I don't believe you should marry this guy. I know you want to be married and have a child but maybe this guy is not the one for you and sooner or later you might meet the right person. Life is never like how you plan it you have to make the most of what you got.

best wishes

Answer 10

honey you really dont want to do that it could back fire in so many ways and plus you are meant to be marrying this man.
why not sit down and hav a talk with him and tell him it makes you feel that he wont go and see if he can have children.
tell him that if he is willing to marry you then what is the problem with him going to the dr maybe he feels ashamed and blames him self and doesnt want to be told those words that he cant have children cause he thinks you will leave him for someone else? mayb you need to reassure him that you are both init together cause thats what a marrige is just remind him that technology has come very far and there could be lots of ways for you to still have babies
please dont go behind is back you will regret it immensly

Answer 11

Wrong, thats just stupid. If you love your bf you wouldnt want another mans child. Plus you really should be married before trying to have kids. Be happy with your bf and when the time is right it will happen. I think cheaters are scum and if your bf ever found out which he could he would hate you. Thats not the best of both worlds.