When you married her 10 years ago, she was hot. But now she has let herself go. What should I do?
2007-04-12 08:21:41 · 37 answers · asked by conservative_122 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
ok.. i know you have looks issues with your wife.. but did you ever sit back and think maybe just maybe she doesn't think your hot anymore either? but she loves you anyways? we cant all look hot the rest of our lives.. has she had children? extra weight.. dont give a rip about her looks? maybe she is depressed... whatever the reason you need to talk to her.. be gentle about it.. maybe suggest a new hair style.. or the 2 of you going to the gym together or if you cant afford a gym, maybe a evening walk or jog... you are going to have to help her feel good about herself again...
2007-04-12 08:49:57 · answer #1 · answered by nurse_driller 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Since I have been married I have put on weight. I have not let myself go as such, I still blow dry my hair, do my make up wear nice clothes etc.. but the weight really is creeping on and the reason for this is.... im not happy in my marraige.
Have you ever thought this is the reason why your wife has let herself go? You may make it blinding obvious to her that you dont find her attractive and that must just cripple her self esteem.
Take her out once a week. Wether it is the cinema, a meal, a walk, or a glass of wine somewhere. Make her feel loved, wanted and attractive again. My husband takes me no where, he never holds my hand in the street and it breaks my heart. Dont make your wife feel the way I do. Let her know what a wonderful wife she is.
2007-04-12 08:35:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
For better or for worse. Set an example. Take her to places where she may have to focus one how she looks. If she gets a dose of feeling out of place with her looks maybe she will come to realize on her own she has some issues to deal with. Ask yourself if you should have seen it coming and have to blame yourself in choosing someone that maybe you really didn't want and didn't have the brains to see it coming. What did her mom look like? That will tell you a little about your choice. I had some really attractive girlfriends all my life and you get tired of the good looking ones too. Sometimes it isn't always the looks but their personality or more often your own. Do an evaluation of yourself before focusing on others.
2007-04-12 08:30:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
LOL...omg. Questions like this crack me up. I can pretty much guarantee that after 10 years you are not looking so great either and your wife is probably wondering why YOU let YOURSELF go. Why don't you get a gym membership for the both of you and work out together.
2007-04-12 08:53:09 · answer #4 · answered by KoKo.Licious 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not have a real choice in this matter. You wont be able to get a divorce on those grounds, cause looks just like sex should not be major issues within a marriage, even though we make them.
On the other hand she could take you to court and ask for a divorce on grounds of emotional abuse and she would walk away leaving you with just your shorts if your lucky.
2007-04-12 08:39:40 · answer #5 · answered by steinerrw 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Take a look in the mirror and ask if she would find you as "hot" as you were 10 years ago.
2007-04-12 11:00:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I take it you are the Don Juan of your local area...
First, if you only married your wife because she was "hot", then you're an idiot.
Second, it's a matter of degree. If she's obese or flat-out given up, then I hear your case. Otherwise, suck it up. People age. People gain weight. With the million and one things women have to manage there's not a lot of time or energy left for maintaining a perfect form.
My suggestion - if you're actually interested in maintaining your marriage, which goes far beyond what either one of you looks like - would be to encourage your wife to be more active. Compliment her when she looks nice. Engage in exercise together. Offer to cook for her, and make it healthy. Lead by example.
Otherwise, I guess you could divorce her, so she can find someone of substance, and you can find a shallow bimbo.
2007-04-12 08:27:40 · answer #7 · answered by Courtney 3 · 4⤊ 3⤋
Get a blow up doll and marry it. You along with everyone else changes with age. I'm sure you don't look the same as you did 10 years ago. You love and cherish someone for more than looks, if not then you married her with lust in mind not love.
2007-04-12 08:49:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Make her feel like she has reason to take care of herself again...take her out somewhere she has to dress nice and wear makeup, take her to the spa for a day of beauty. Women need to feel wanted and desired or we tend to stop caring how we look to our partener. We may think we look great and yet our partener may think different.
2007-04-12 13:59:59 · answer #9 · answered by swtlilblonde31 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love her more. Women care more for their appearance when they feel loved and special and when they have a good reason (not a threat). If she is overweight, do things to fill her up in other ways so she isn't drawn to food as much. Eat healthier yourself and say nothing about her choices. Take her on walks, just for the special time, not "for exercise."
Go shopping with her, for fun, and complement her on things that make her look good. Then buy her one special thing each month.
Do not make this obvious and do not make it an issue. Care for her heart, and her outside will reflect her inside.
2007-04-12 08:30:53 · answer #10 · answered by mom of 5 in CA 3 · 6⤊ 1⤋