We seperated about 2 weeks ago I left because of to much fighting and I'm pregnant. He called me this morning and asked me if I was ready to come home. He wants to raise our child right and he is willing to go to counseling and be a good husband. He told me to think about it for a while and let him know. Should I??? Its what I want but what if everything goes back to the way it was?
2007-04-12 06:18:15 · 36 answers · asked by ERICKSMAMA 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
he is willing to work on it that's a big step ...so if this is what you want then you need to start working on it to ....
you have showed him that you will not put up with his S***
and all the fighting by moving out so he knows it's got to be different or you will just do it again and this time it could be for good !!!!!!!
and if it happens again well then you both can say you tyred and more people need to do that and not give up so easy
2007-04-12 06:26:50 · answer #1 · answered by bonnie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hunny, the way I see it, is that you're going to have to take a risk either way. I myself have been in a rough relationship for a little over a year now, but I was patient, and now we're better than we've ever been! (No fighting for a month! And still doing good.)
If you don't feel right about going back, let him know that. Maybe if you wait a little longer, and when you're ready move back, and just see how it goes. If it DOES go back to the way it was, (Hoping not) then you can still leave. You never know until you try!
Good luck!
2007-04-12 06:23:57 · answer #2 · answered by Trishie 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want the marriage to work, you do need to go back. It will be hard, but counseling will be a good first step in the right direction. Being afraid of things going back to the way they were is completely natural. It's okay to wonder about that and you should discuss that with your husband as calmly as possible during a counseling session.
I do hope things get better for you!
2007-04-12 06:22:23 · answer #3 · answered by Lillian M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is good that he wants you to come home and good for him for wanting to raise your kids right. I think you should go back home and do the best that you can. It takes 2 people to make this work and as I have mentioned before you need to keep an atmosphere of peace in the home for the sake of the baby.
You mentioned "but what if everything goes back to the way that it was" but what if it doesn't? I believe in miracles because my marriage is one, go to counseling, give this all to God and lets see what will happen. God bless you sweetie.
2007-04-12 09:44:00 · answer #4 · answered by Ama A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all, it would do you well to remove the word "should" from your vocabulary. You have a decision to make, and no one here knows what you "should" do....
i say follow your instincts.... and use your head.
i do have a suggestion -- since he has said he is willing to go to counseling, you can do that while you are still separated and see how it goes.
you do not have to move back in right away to go to therapy together. perhaps with therapy and time apart, you will be able to make a more sound decision about this.
if your husband is going to change, you will probably see it over time in counseling.
take care of yourself hon... and don't go back until you're feeling more sure of the situation.
hugz
2007-04-12 06:40:58 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the very first thing you must do is discover why this hindrance occurred in the first location. Although your daughter really did make up the entire concern, as her mother you must be involved as to why your daughter would make up such a lie. It appears as though there is a deeper drawback here, and it might most of the time be in your loved ones's satisfactory interests for those who figured out what that obstacle is earlier than going any further. Side observe - you will have to hire the movie "Georgia Rule" with Jane Fonda, Felicity Huffman, and Lindsey Lohan. The movie covers this specific equal crisis, however due to the fact that of the way it performs out, it would provide you with a different perspective.
2016-08-11 00:17:34 · answer #6 · answered by isai 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll never know if it'll turn out again to be the same unless you go back and try. He's made the move to get you back. Even knuckled under to counseling. So...go. If it doesn't work you always have the option you're in now to return to. I'd say he'll know that already without having to remind him.
2007-04-12 06:51:34 · answer #7 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, life gives us no promises, but think carefully...can you live with yourself with the "what ifs". You don't have move home right this minute. Go see the counsler first. Make him make good on his promises. Take things slow, and see if he's going to stick to his word.
You can go over for short periods of time. Try talking with him, go out and have coffee with him, spend time with me.
If you just don't think you can handle having to make the decision to leave again, then don't go back. Honey, it's up to you. We can't tell you what's right for you. We can make suggestions and give you some advice, but it's up to you.
I don't think I could live with the "what ifs" in this case.
Being with child and having marrige troubles right now, you have got to be under so much stress and strain, and it's not good for you or that precious baby. You have every right to say " I need a little more time". But you also take the chance that he may just give up. So it's a damn if you do-damn if yo don't situation. But you are the one that lived through it, and he's saying all the right things, but he's now got to prove it.
I would ask for some counseling before going back home. At least get a professional option. And I think it's wonderful of him to be willing to go. Lots of men are too prideful to go, to have to admit they have problems is asking to much. So, give credit to where credit is due.
Praying for you and your little family. Best wishes and prayers for a healthy baby. Take care of yourself, and know that you got us here to lean on!
God bless us all............
2007-04-12 06:35:25 · answer #8 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are fighting over petty stuff in general(b/c lot of relationships are BASED on that)it's a hard habit to break BUT it can be done...we've been there.
It is worth it for you're unborn child's sake to try...as long as he is not an abusive husband or a cheater, I'd say work it out. Good luck and congratulations!
2007-04-12 06:25:45 · answer #9 · answered by mrs O 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do it. If he's willing to go to counselling, that's great. Wonderful news. Hope everything works out. You have to discuss WHY you left, what changes need to be made, work on yourselves as a couple. Forgive each other. Love each other.
I'm very gald for you.
2007-04-12 12:38:53 · answer #10 · answered by prouddaddy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋