2007-04-12 05:54:24 · 24 answers · asked by coldkiss 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Personally I'd be more upset if my friend knew my husband was having an affair, and didnt tell me. If you care about this person, sit her down alone, tell her you're only telling her because you care, and it's up to her to decide what to do with the information. DONT do it unless you have unequivocal proof though. If you doubt, dont say anything.
2007-04-12 06:03:10 · answer #1 · answered by Goddess Nikki 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anna, I am concerned about your use of the word "safest". I am so hoping you meant to say "easiest" or "painless". Or are you serious and you think that this woman can hurt you. If you are afraid she would hurt you, then I recommend a nice letter.
I do want to say "THANK YOU" for doing this. I know if it were me, I would want to know or have my suspision confirmed. There's no way you can protect this woman's feelings. She's been hurting right now, and she may have some clue that something is wrong, but doesn't know what.
If she's a close friend, then invite her over for coffee, don't pick a public place. Let it be somewhere where she can cry, scream, holler, cuss...let all the pain and betrayal out.
Make sure you know for sure what this man is up too. If it's rumors then you make sure you tell her that first! If you know for fact, then be as calm as you can. Be ready with the tissues, and a shoulder to cry on. What a good friend you are!
Beware that she may get mad at you! Be ready for all that anger and hurt be unleashed on you. You might lose a friend, you know the old saying "don't kill the messanger" there's truth in that. Good luck and bless you!
God bless us all...........
2007-04-12 13:25:08 · answer #2 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The safest way is to flat out just tell them. If you have any proof, that would be good too. Hopefully this person isnt a friend, because most of the time, you end up losing the friend. Goodluck
2007-04-12 12:57:41 · answer #3 · answered by Angel Eve 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is none. Chances are they are not going to believe you anyway. Where is the proof! Hope you have some solid ground to stand on. If it is friends of yours you will only be caught up in the middle of it - and once the truth is out and all is well between them you will be the bad guy here! Send a typed letter, un-signed and the include the proof without bringing yourself into the picture.
2007-04-12 13:16:44 · answer #4 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no 'safe' way. First of all, if the wife wanted to know she would. And what makes you think she doesn't already know, but just hasn't gotten around to admitting it? You have no way of knowing her reaction, either. She might flip the script and put it on you trying to steal her man. If you insist on making it your business, you shouldn't 'tell' her anyhting. You have proof, then you show her. Like calling her from the club and telling her she needs to come down here and see if this guy hugged up on some blonde is her man, coz damn, he looks just like him. Other than that, leave off and mind your own.
2007-04-12 13:04:40 · answer #5 · answered by Toxic Buddah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is a friend, why are you worrying about what is safe, should you not be worried about your friend? Why would it be unsafe for you to tell her unless he is being unfaithful to her with you? If it is not a friend, then you need to leave it alone, because then you are just getting in someone elses business and you may not need to worry about her, but him too.
2007-04-12 13:01:49 · answer #6 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get pictures, and put them in the mail to them. A picture is worth a thousand words. You do not have to sign who send them. Just a date and time would be nice on the pictures so they could be used in court. You do not loose a friend this way either.
2007-04-12 13:48:04 · answer #7 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would only tell them if it's a close friend. I had a friend who knew my husband was cheating and didn't tell me. In the end I understood why she didn't , but I felt betrayed by her.
You need to be absolutely sure that he's actually cheating, try to have some evidence. Then break it to her gently, just tell her you don't want to hurt her, but you feel obligated as her friend to tell her.
2007-04-12 13:22:24 · answer #8 · answered by Nikki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know that there really is a safe way to do something like that... but maybe you could tell her and kinda set it up so she finds out for herself. Or you could sit her down and tell her. but either way she is going to be upset or hurt. And once you tell her it would be nice to offer your alliance with her so that she has someone to go to when she needs to. I hope this helps.
2007-04-12 13:02:01 · answer #9 · answered by tears fall softly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shout it from across the street, then run because she is not going to believe you. You will be accused of wanting him for yourself. I speak from experience. Never again unless I am asked.
2007-04-12 13:06:45 · answer #10 · answered by MissUnderstood 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋