Have been with my b/f for almost 2 years,and now I find out he is married with kids.I had no idea-I feel like an idiot.I am also 4 months pregnant,Please help me.....
2007-04-12 03:35:26 · 14 answers · asked by *charmer* 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He moved in with me soon after we got together-he travels alot for work(or so I thought),that is why I didn't know he was married.I never had any reason not to trust him.
2007-04-12 03:50:35 · update #1
okay, i really feel for you. I'm so sorry this happened.
my now ex-husband cheated on me with another girl and got her pregnant also, and she didn't know about me until she called me (he'd dialed me from her phone and she hit redial). She was devastated when she found out he was married.
What you need to do is focus on your pregnancy. Make sure he takes responsibility for it too. Get a DNA test if he all of the sudden says the baby isn't his. Make SURE you get child support, etc. from him.
In no way should you let him off the hook. You may want to call a lawyer or your local family/women's resource center to help you out. They can usually find someone who will help you for free or for a reduced rate.
Good luck! *hugs* Just remember that your baby is most important here and will need you. Forget about the guy...he's taken. Your baby will have YOU and that guy you were with? He made bad choices and will have to live with himself later.
YOU certainly don't want him, if you now know he's a cheater who would jeopardize his family. His wife will probably leave him over this, but trust me, you don;t want to be with him either. Build a life for yourself and your child. Happiness will find you. :)
2007-04-12 03:43:00 · answer #1 · answered by BarbieGurl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OH MY DEAR....You need to leave this man now...Make sure that you file the proper paperwork and make him pay child support for the baby that you are expecting.Unfortunately you got taken advantage of and that is his fault not yours but now you need to do the right thing and leave him.His wife also has the right to know what kind of a scum bag she is married to she is going to find out eventually anyway when he has to pay you child support..Don't get down on yourself and you will meet the man that is right for you..Good Luck & Best Wishes.
2007-04-12 10:42:32 · answer #2 · answered by Maureen B 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I've been exactly where you are at, only I had just found out that I was pregnant with a child that we discussed having and tried for!
Don't feel like a idiot. The man was an excellent liar, just like my ex.
You now need to take care of yourself and your child. Go file for child support!!
2007-04-12 10:40:48 · answer #3 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What an awful man.
Leave his lying ass.
What makes you think he won't do the same thing w/ another woman that he's doing with you.
Raise your baby on your own - get child support from him though. List his name on the birth certificate. Maybe even give his wife a call - introduce yourself.
Make him get caught.
2007-04-12 11:03:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may never had reason not to trust him but your sure do now.
Cut ties with this liar and in 5 months file for child support. Just his untruthfulness will screw him to the wall in court.
2007-04-12 10:54:25 · answer #5 · answered by Quasimodo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i 'm sorry a/b this you are in a difficult situation but you need to confront him and talk to his wife . she needs to know what kind of man she's married to. i'm not advocating breaking up a family but he deserves it b/c it's wrong of what he did you both you and his wife need to get together and beat his a**. you have to look at things in her position. how would you feel and would you want to know. it may be hard but he's been lying to you for 2yrs if he wanted to leave his wife he would've and take this as a life lesson. if you haven't met his family then there's a reason. women have been raising babies on their own for years.so you'll be ok. but get rid of him. i meant to lie for 2yrs that's just low. but you make sure you take him to court and don't let him sweet talk you either b/c trust me he will try. 2yrs. damn he must be one heck of a lover for you not ask any questions. get out now.
2007-04-12 10:46:21 · answer #6 · answered by freedom fighter 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No wait a minute. Is he married but not living with his family. Is he seperated legally, just relax for a minute. Figure this out. If he is still married, and deceiving you and his family then you have to make him pay. If he is seperated, and just waiting for a divorce for financial reasons or others, then take some time to figure things out.
2007-04-12 10:45:58 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
leave him. honestly with that type-of person, --you're better off without him!
also, don't add to your pain. don't put yourself down by bashing yourself, saying you're an idiot for not having any clue, etc. you shouldn't have thought for something like this plus people are sneaky. worry about your mental health and your baby. he can go life his other life, literally.
2007-04-12 10:41:57 · answer #8 · answered by who?what?when 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How have you been clueless for that long? He never took you to his house? I say get rid of him and the fetus and move on with your life. Learn from your mistakes and become a more enlightened human. Good Luck.
2007-04-12 10:43:37 · answer #9 · answered by me! 4 · 0⤊ 4⤋
dude you need to tell his wife.
she deserves to know because if he did it once.... he will do it again. as for the kid... if you want kids.... have it....and file for child support if not.... give it up for adoption because abortion is not the way to go.
2007-04-12 10:43:56 · answer #10 · answered by amberlynn 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋