i never wanted to be with him after my son,and now he gave up. we haven't been intimate in a year,but he says he loves me.what do you think he's doing for sex?
2007-04-12 02:07:44 · 14 answers · asked by bella-d46 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
maybe nothing,,,,,a man has his pride and i doubt he wants another knock back and has become so used to life without sex he doesnt really acknowledge the fact there isnt any. glam yourself up and make it clear tonight isnt a 'no' night,,,,,,you do all the chasing,,make him feel wanted as sometimes the libido needs a kick up the proverbial,,if you need a subtle less in your face way of arranging this fine evening,,get out a packet of headache tablets,,wait for him to sit down and relax,,walk in with them,,show them and tell him,,"honey,,tonight have no intention of using these',,he should get the message.men get scared too you know and as it has been so long he may need encouragement,give him some.good luck hun
2007-04-12 02:45:49 · answer #1 · answered by lex 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel!!! My partner is not that into kissing, cuddling, or even sex. It tears you up inside. I was actually laying in bed a couple of hours ago, crying for the same reason you are. It is NOT you. Don't think that. And don't change who you are. I know it's so hard not to take it personally, but it is him with the problem, not you. The best thing you can do is talk to him. Ask him why. Tell him you feel like he pulled out all the moves to get you in the first place, and now that he has you, for some reason he feels it's okay to stop making the effort. It's NOT okay! You, as his wife, deserve an explanation. He cannot withdraw the intimacy you both shared without telling you why. If he's having some kind of problem, he needs to be honest about it. You need to talk to him, and as soon as possible because the resentment, frustration and anger you feel will explode. And you may use it in a destructive way - by cheating (which I can well understand, you're looking for that affection. You feel so low that you feel like you need that validation from someone who can give that to you - but this comes at a cost, possibly your marriage). Tell your husband that things need to change. Have a deadline in your mind, if by that time he hasn't made any effort to be affectionate, then leave. You don't have to live like this for the rest of your life. Just remember - it's NOT you with the problem.
2016-05-18 00:56:35 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what it feels to give up, but not only do you give up some of us lose some of the love we had for our mate. In my case I got tired of being questioning why this was happening and then just shut off those feelings the best I could. I stop wanting sex with him because I didn't it seemed like I would be begging. Making love with the person you love should come natural and when it doesn't you feel as if they don't love you anymore. Explore why you don't want to be with him anymore. I didn't nothing about sex, but I can tell you I was becoming very frustrated with his lack of wanting me, of course it ended in divorce. He had an illness for a while, but that isn't any reason not to be with the person you say you love. I can tell you it slowing eats away at your self-esteem, so will he find it in the arms of another woman? Who knows as I know you grow tired of it.
2007-04-12 03:03:29 · answer #3 · answered by Krinta 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A person can come home every night and still cheat... It’s happened to me... there are other times of the day where and when it can happen.
But first you need to fix this. After having a child it’s common for women to loose their sex drive. He probably understands that.
A year is a long time.. I think you had better get that flame going again... Make the move do what it takes to get him aroused. You two also need to talk and see why its like this STILL....
2007-04-12 02:40:01 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Initiate it and and rekindle the intimacy! Life is too short. If he's not cheating then it's called the shower! It may just be a phase but you could help it to get back to where it once used to be... Good luck!
2007-04-12 02:18:22 · answer #5 · answered by sophia_of_light 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i dont know but let me tell u dat u better start satisfying him physically before things worsen n everything goes out of ur hands
2007-04-12 02:31:12 · answer #6 · answered by helpathand 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not to scare u. But he may resort to an "outlet". Could be masturbation, could be another person. You better initiate lovemaking, before..... things become worse.
2007-04-12 02:14:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
mary palm and her 5 sisters
2007-04-12 07:02:04 · answer #8 · answered by Jim G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably well liked by Mary palm and her five sisters...
2007-04-12 02:17:28 · answer #9 · answered by momof3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does it matter at this point? If you really care, you better start doing something about it.
2007-04-12 02:17:26 · answer #10 · answered by Manda 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋