My boyfriend and I have been in a long distance relationship for 3 years. We are now moving in together next week, I'm moving 1000 miles away to be with him.
A few months ago his "friend" came to hang out with him for a night, they went to the bar and she ended up trying to kiss him, or successfully kissing him. He called me immediatly to tell me what happened. Ever since I've been cautious about her intentions, I'm a girl... I know how evil we can be!
He's out of town, she happens to be "vacationing" with her best friend for the weekend in the same city. I told him I was uncomfortable with the whole situation. He said that he wouldn't hang out with her, he didn't realize her intentions may be to get him. I said I didn't want him to have to not be around friends because of a jealous girlfriend, but to be aware of the possible intentions.
Did I cross the line? Was I justified in my concerns? What should I do next?
Thanks for your input!!
DiZdZ!!
2007-04-11 19:50:45 · 28 answers · asked by Randomblina >^..^< 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i say it's fishy. if he is innocent, it's still suspcious she's vacationing in the same city, she's up to something.
2007-04-11 19:54:05 · answer #1 · answered by fear of the dark 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes us women can be evil when it comes down to trying to get a man that is with someone else just to prove we can do it. You have every right to be cautious about this women. Is there anyway you can give him a surprise visit and telling him the truth about why you went there? There is nothing wrong about checking things out before you move in with him and leave your other life behind. You have crossed no lines. You are giving up everything for him make sure you are not making a mistake. These are only the things I would do. Do as your heart says.
2007-04-11 20:01:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well a thousand miles to move for a guy you are uncertain of is just plain silly... he is telling you HIS side of the story--and may be leaving out some details---a thousand miles is a long way to move back if you are constantly thinking about him and this girl....and you know you will always have this on your mind--you will just always be miserable and distrusting---better hold off and rethink this move.... unless you have a lot of money to throw away. Distrust is NOT a good way to start off a live in committment. Personally I think the story was told because he has a guilty conscious and wants to clear his mind his way--just in case you heard something . A grown up man knows how to avoid a pesty female that wants a kiss. Come on--get a grip, here.
2007-04-11 20:02:22 · answer #3 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did it ever dawn on you that he may have concented to all of these things you mention? Once she kissed him(how do u know he didnt kiss her), he knew what the deal was. He probably knew she was coming to visit and was probably ok wih it. Sounds like you're not getting the whold truth from him. Do you really think it's a good idea to pack up and move so far to be with him? I sure hope he's worth it! He sounds like a manipualtor. He's savvy with his plot though...He's got you thinking she's who you should be worried about.
My suggestion is to go stay with him for a month, without moving your things and see how the living arrangement goes. Moving 1000 miles is a loooooong way especailly when you dont know the whole truth. Good Luck!
2007-04-11 20:05:08 · answer #4 · answered by FemFatale 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are behaving completely reasonably. Most women would probably loose it and knock out some other girl coming onto their man. You handled the entire situation quite responsibly. You trusted him and did not over react. Being jealous is perfectly normal but you seem to be completely in control of your emotions which is great. Your boyfriend has responded in a very mature way and has taken care not to hurt you. It seems you both have a well functioning relationship and I wish you all the best.
2007-04-11 20:44:21 · answer #5 · answered by Fire 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you're not being too jealous. You've got the right to be worried about what is going on between the girl and you're boyfriend. Although you're boyfriend seems trustworthy because he actually tells you when she tried to kiss him and you're relationship has been going for 3 years, that should mean something, a good thing. It sounds like she's up to something but by the sounds of it i don't think you're boyfriend would do anything to hurt you. good luck in this situation!!!
2007-04-11 19:59:20 · answer #6 · answered by MizzRandom(: 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would trust him and not mention it again. If he wasn't trustworthy he wouldn't have told you that she tried to kiss him. Don't cause a problem where there is none by being insecure because he does care about you. Causing you to act jealously is what she wants because it will make you less attractive in his eyes. Remember that you're the one he wants, so feel good about yourself and don't worry. You will both be happier in the long run and this will build better trust for you in the future.
2007-04-11 19:57:34 · answer #7 · answered by name 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get this thing cleared up before you make a permanent move. Jealousy has no place in a relationship.
I am not a jealous person, my feeling is if a guy gave me a reason, then I am not loosing anything. I obviously didn't have anything to begin with.
2007-04-11 20:03:19 · answer #8 · answered by howdigethere 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to be jealous and concerned!
If a girl kissed my boyfriend I definitely wouldn't want her around him again.
Just think if a guy that was your friend kissed you and your boyfriend wasn't there.. I bet he wouldn't want you hanging out with him again either! Good luck.. keep that ho away from your man! lol
2007-04-11 19:56:45 · answer #9 · answered by Amanda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very justified. Did you find it a bit suspicious that she planned to be in town just when he would be there? You better get over ther, or tell him he needs to come home. Sounds like she has her web set to catch him. He may or may not be in on it. Either way it is a bad situation!!
2007-04-11 19:57:52 · answer #10 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No ur bf sounds like a total sweetheart, and the fact he told u straight away proves alot. Yes u have a right to be jealous but i really dont think u should worry to much,he seema geunine and it seens he is going to be very honest.
U r really lucky to have him.
good luck and try not to worry.
2007-04-11 20:00:14 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋