i have a son who is 16 and has been arrested and charged with harrassment 2nd on myself and my husband for punching and threatning us. he has been in counseling and different centers for the last 6 years and nothing has helped and now the court tells me i have to pay for his lawyer to get him off this charge because im legally responsible for him till 21 yrs old !!!! even though he did this to us in our house, and this isnt the first but many times, and we had him arrested because im scared of when HE GOES OFF ON US AND WHATS NEXT!!!!! what the hell can i do or do i have to pay for his lawyer i told the judge NO WAY and he told me i am gonna face jail time then if i dont get him a lawyer and pay for it because we make too much for a free one to represent him!! should i go to jail and let parents know they dont have to be abused in their own homes or should i cave in because the system sucks !!!!! HELP WHAT SHOULD I DO ???????
2007-04-11 16:49:34 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Politics & Government ➔ Law Enforcement & Police
Don't know what your state laws are, but perhaps you need an attorney for yourself and research the laws in your state. In most states children under 18 are the responsibility of their parents.
Ask your attorney if there is anyway you can have your son assessed by your local mental health agency. My daughter works at our local mental health agency and at the place she works, they will assess all ages and they can be admitted without the permission of the person who is being assessed.
Once assessed, a treatment plan can be put in motion to help the person gain control over their behavior. With and without medication.
I'd check with an attorney what parents rights are, especially if you are the victim.
2007-04-11 17:02:33 · answer #1 · answered by T esira 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First to be a judge doesn't mean he is right all the time, no victim has to help his attacker even if he is his son, besides that would be a "conflict of interest". Do not argue with the judge or he will take it personal against you like many unprofessional judges do; Hire a lawyer for yourself and let him deal and fight the system, I'm sure he will find a way to go around that ignorant judge.
You can also ask for a protection order and give up your parental rights over him, based on his abusive and dangerous behavior and threats to your safety, that way you will be no longer responsible for him and he would become responsibility of the state. But ask your lawyer because all states have different laws.
2007-04-11 18:07:43 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no way in hell, I would pay for a lawyer! I would make a stand, cause its not right. Obviously if you are one of those idiot parents that lets their kids abuse them and keep bailing them out cause you "love" them, then by all mean hire a lawyer and take a chance next time he does this, might not get lucky again. He will just do it again unless he knows he has noone to bail him out when he actually faces jailtime for his stupidity. Fight the law! I dont even think that sounds right that you have to get a lawyer! I think they are full of it. He did it, now he faces it alone. Not right. Best luck
2007-04-11 16:56:49 · answer #3 · answered by xratedsugar 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, sometimes the system sucks and un-fortunately until your son is of age, the bill goes to the Parents. You are held financially and morally Responsible for your child until they become of age. With a teen age girl, if she becomes pregnant, the parents will be forced to pay all hospital bills. The court is right !! You need to work with the system and not against it. Sounds like your son didn't fall too far from the tree. Paddling against the current. Flow with the current and your son, might see the light.
2007-04-11 17:02:41 · answer #4 · answered by Norskeyenta 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Excuse Me!! Your the victim!, Hello!!!!. I would suggest going to a "Victims Advocacy" group and enlisting their support. I don't know what State this happened in but, as a Victim you are entitled to Rights. Another thing to do is have him committed for his own safety until he can get professional help. I am going to do some research on this matter and Post my findings on this site. A "Victim(s)" should not have to shell out $$$$ to defend the perpetrator of a crime committed against them, even if it is they're kid. That's like a slap in the face to say O.K., you called the cops and caused all this so you pay for it. How ridiculous.
GOD BLESS/GOOD LUCK!!
2007-04-11 18:12:01 · answer #5 · answered by Chuck-the-Duck 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you don't have to pay for his lawyer! There are plenty of public defenders out there. Let's see how well he does with one them! I'd go to the media. They love stories like this and you'll get a lot of sympathy. The judge will get the grief.
2007-04-11 16:59:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you make enough money, I would get a lawyer for yourself.
That sounds ridiculous. You could withhold the charges I suppose, and then change the locks and file a restraining order against the future criminal.
The kid needs some serious therapy, including drug/shock therapy. I don't know what makes kids so nasty sometimes.
Imagine what his teachers probably have to deal with!!
2007-04-11 16:55:37 · answer #7 · answered by powhound 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you have made the report against him I do not see where you would be resposible call an attorney for a free consult and find out your rights at 16 he can be legally emancipated and would be responsible for his actions.
2007-04-11 16:58:58 · answer #8 · answered by marci m 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to hire an attorney to represent YOU.
But it is also easy, you can as his parents work out a deal with the Juv court to have him sent to boot camp or the such. hire yourself an attorney you have alot more rights than this liberal judge is telling you
2007-04-12 01:57:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are focusing on the worng issues.
The main issues you have at hand is How to put your son in the correct path again.
If you need to pay for your son's benefit I think you should pay.
You should show more love and concern irregardlessof numerous rejection by him.
If you as a parent do not make him feel being loved, then who else can he turn to? Don't force any issues down his throat although you may think that your idea is right. Give him a chance to reject and explore with him why he things differently. You may be surprised that from his perspective he may be right.
So I suggest don't give up on your son. Communicate with him more..... he will one day..come back to his senses.
Don't give up on him... after all he has both your genes....
take care
2007-04-11 16:58:00 · answer #10 · answered by trymejames 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋