my dad died when i was 3 but dont even no wat e looks like or where e is but can't ask my mum. what shall i do

Answer 1

I don't know how old you are, but no matter how old you are or how sad your mother may have been, you should be able to feel free to just talk to her and tell her you need to know what he looked liked and where he is.

If she won't talk with you at all about him talk to your school counselor. Maybe he/she could talk to your mother and tell her the importance of giving you information.

Maybe your mother believes you need to be older before she talks about your father with you. Depending on how old you are, maybe you will have to wait until you're a little older.

I do know one thing: I have an adopted son, and I knew that he wasn't ready for the facts about his beginnings when he was the age of 21 (when most adoption agencies believe adopted children have a right to that information). I knew that my son needed another few years in order to be able to deal with the information, but the agency contacted him right after high 21st birthday. He had a lot of difficulty because (as I, his mother, knew, he wasn't quite ready/mature enough).

There's a point where maybe you need to trust that your mother knows or thinks information about your father will require more maturity on your part. Maybe she's got some information she knows is difficult (as I did when it came to my son), and maybe she's waiting until she feels you can process it without too much upset or confusion.

You do have a right to the information and to have some idea of what he looked liked, but maybe, too, its just so hard for your mother she may not know what to say. Hang in there. You'll get your information.

Try to have some understanding that your mother has been through something very difficult and may not be able to share with you right now.

Answer 2

Let me see if I have this right...
"My dad died when I was three but I don't even know what he looked like or where he is buried. I can't ask my mom. What shall I do?"

You don't say why you can't ask your mom. Do you not know where she is? If you do, then why not just ask her or ask an aunt or some other adult family member that knew him.

If you know his name, check with the bureau of vital statistics and find out when and where he died. Then you can check the cemetary records to find where he is buried.

Answer 3

Have you seen a copy of your birth certificate with his name on. If so you could then look for his death on one of the many websites on line such as findmypast if you find that then you could get a copy of the death certificate and this would give you an idea of what area to look in.

Answer 4

You really need to ask her you have a right to know about your Dad,your doing no harm asking.

Answer 5

if u no ur mum might cry just try and find pic of him. and sorry to hear that

Answer 6

why can't you ask your mom? she would have this info. do you know your dad's family? you could ask them. how about other relatives that knew him? someone knows something.

Answer 7

Ask your mum ...really,she will be expecting it.

Answer 8

are you sure he died or did your mom just tell you that?

do you know his name?

Answer 9

why can't you ask your mum???????
He was your father and I am sure she will tell you

Answer 10

explain to her that you are wondering about him and i'm sure she will be willing to help :)