Me and my boyfriend have been going out for about seven months now. In his past probably like 5 to 7 years ago he had a girlfriend that he cheated on. When we were first going out in our relationship he did explain how he did cheat on her and how he felt bad after the fact, and how he was caught. I've personally have been cheated on in the past relationship, and it seems like i'm having trust issues with him. For example, how he's always working and even on his days off hes working overtime. But he works at a call center were he claims they hardly ever have time to talk to anyone. He does call me from his job from time to time when hes working on his days off but its like, i seem to still not trust him. I feel that if he cheated on his girlfriend in the past he will cheat on me. Honestly I mean he really hasn't given me any reason not to trust him. But it seems like I just can't. So what should i believe he will cheat on me like he did to his ex? Or how can i learn to trust him
2007-04-11 04:45:19 · 22 answers · asked by starlight2007 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Trust Noone.
2007-04-11 04:49:40 · answer #1 · answered by bornonaplatein1988 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's very hard to completely trust someone who has cheated in the past, even if it wasn't while he was with you. The doubt and insecurity can drive you crazy, and may start to affect your relationship negatively, like if you start reading his e-mail and going through his things. If you want to be with him you've got to make the decision to trust him until you have a real solid reason to do otherwise. It is possible that he did it that one time and has no intentions to cheat on you. Don't drive yourself crazy, be more confident in yourself and your relationship, you said yourself he hasn't given you any reason not to trust him. Some counseling might help you, lack of trust like that can often be a lack of self esteem.
2007-04-11 04:53:28 · answer #2 · answered by Lee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you've been burned pretty bad in the past,sorry for that...Ive been there to and it sucks,It dosent seem like you've fully recovered from the past incident.As far as trusting him goes ,its up in the air,people cheat for different reasons and you cant control that but you can control how you feel and i think that its not really fair to him that you have issues with his past and yours also.Forget all that garbage that happend years ago this is a fresh start for you
2007-04-11 05:10:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
One answer i seen on here was once a cheater always a cheater, this answer may be true for most but maybe on the first time some may be testing the water so to say and see that the grass isnt always greener on the other side and may deter him from never doing it again
2007-04-11 04:51:34 · answer #4 · answered by dan101proof 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe, like the others, that once a cheater, always a cheater. But that means, once he's cheated on YOU, he's always a cheater. Since he has not cheated on YOU, I feel he should have your trust until he gives you a reason not to.
2007-04-11 04:53:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once a cheater, always a cheater!!! And if you have experienced this in other relationships, then why would you want to put yourself in that position again? Plus, nobody works that much!! If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, then its a duck!! Get my drift??? There are alot of good guys out there, keep looking. Remember, YOU deserve to be treated better.
2007-04-11 04:52:08 · answer #6 · answered by Bren 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if he loves u he could at least make he effort to call or text u uno? just to see if ur ok! but if hes not making the effort then i will certainly make u think otherwise about his past. talk to him and tell him about how hes making u feel. if he hasnt done anything wrong then thats fine! u need to speak to him first. if there is a strong doubt that u feel like he is cheating then it aint worth all this. but dont judge him on his past. communication is key so talk to him first before u assume
2007-04-11 04:50:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you can't.
Cheating comes from people that is unsecured and it could be part of his/her personality already it is like a software that this folks have on their little brain. Do not waste your time with this person and find somebody that really appreciates you, trust me ;)
Good Luck!
2007-04-11 04:52:33 · answer #8 · answered by Patch_Adams_the_real 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he said he felt bad about it, I doubt he would do it again when you aren't saying that you have any problems at all. Guys don't normally cheat just for the sake of cheating.
2007-04-11 04:50:28 · answer #9 · answered by bird73@snet.net 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if he can't call on his regular hours and just on the days he goes in extra,I would be wondering there.But if that's not it i would tell him not to be working so much and spend some time with you to help reassure you.Good luck.
2007-04-11 04:55:10 · answer #10 · answered by hank 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋