I have this new friend Dan, that I met in college. He's very nice, caring, and he's got a bit of a wild/crazy side to him too. We are not dating, never even considered it, we are just friends. I live off of campus and he lives on campus and when we party, sometimes I spend the night w/ him so that I don't have to drive home. Nothing happens when I spend the night. We even sleep in entirely different beds. I have this other friend who I also met in college and have known longer. I'm not dating him either, but, for some reason, he is very much bothered by the fact that I spend the night w/ Dan. He claims that he doesn't care, but he always makes sarcastic comments like "tell dan i said hi" or "ask dan if he will let you come over", etc. I tell him that nothing @ all goes on between us, that he is just concerned about me and doesn't want me to drive home. To this statement, my second friend replies "yeah ok whatever" what does he think is going on and why does he act the way he does??
2007-04-11 02:49:01 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Nobody knows why people act the way they do but the people themselves.
2007-04-11 02:51:46 · answer #1 · answered by luckford2004 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a girlfriend who spent the night sleeping next to this guy she met and my friends were there. I was told by all of them that she went into the bedroom with him but they did not see anything. I was NOT dating her at the time of this party thing I started dating her about a month later. I asked her to tell me what happened and she said nothing he was tanked and fell asleep and snored real loud. I just could not believe that someone would lay in a bed with someone else and not do anything. It took me forever to get over it and I too rubbed it in her face. I think maybe your sarcastic friend has feeling for you and may be thinking your "servicing" Dan when you know you are not. It is none of the other Friend business but you need to find out if sarcasm boy has an unspoken crush and then if you have feeling for him too stop sleeping at Dans.
2007-04-11 09:56:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
*Well I don't see the big deal about you staying over at Dan's house, especially if you have been drinking. In fact you are SMART for doing that, because you are not out drinking and driving. And everyone out on the roads thanks you for that.
~As for your other friend whom you had a "past" with, I think he is secretly jealous of this Dan guy. Even though he would never admit it.
*And this guy (not Dan) apparently still must have some feelings for you, because he wouldn't make those smartass remarks to you about Dan. SO that's my conclusion.
.I'm not sure if you still have any interest in this other guy like you did before (more than friends) but he's obviously still very much interested in you. Because if he TRULY was not, then he would be like "Oh that's cool of Dan to let you crash at his place, so you don't drink and drive."
*Anyways I give you praise for being smart and not drinking and driving, and staying somewhere where you are safe.
.But that is what I think, that this other guy is Jealous and Green with envy of Dan....and he still likes you, and is jealous of the time you spend with Dan. (Even if you are intoxicated).
:) :) Good Luck...I hope you find the answer your looking for!
2007-04-11 10:45:54 · answer #3 · answered by Shut your mouth when u tlk to me 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most likely the scenario that you are dealing with here is that Dan and "other friend" are attracted to you. Stay at my place for safety's sake sets him up for spending private time with you. Whether you are just talking or going as far as having sex it is alone time that you are spending with him and he is probably interpreting that as, "she must dig me." "Other friend" feels threatened by this. He has known you longer and at the very least sees the potential that you may start spending more time with Dan and less time with him. "Other friend" may see Dan as a threat to you if he knows your intentions with Dan, or lack there of and is afraid what Dan may do when he comes to this realization. I'm assuming that Dan does not really know that you are not interested in him. You may think that you have made it clear to him, but you are muddying the water by staying with him. So simply you are sending mixed signals to Dan, "other friend" sees this and is either jealous or watching out for you, hence all the sarcasm. You need to set clear boundaries with Dan and SHOW him those boundaries as well as telling him. Unless you are interested in Dan, in which case you might have to have a sit and chat with "other friend" to explain that you want to pursue Dan and want his suport and friendship to continue.
2007-04-11 10:31:11 · answer #4 · answered by schultajaet 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can definitely tell that your other friend as many strong feelings for you. Dan also might have the same feelings and since you've known the other friend longer he might feel a little betrayed, and even jealous. He feels that Dan is starting to become more of a competition over getting you.
2007-04-11 10:15:17 · answer #5 · answered by ~Angel~ 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your other friend feels more for you than just friendship. It is quite evident in his sarcastic remarks. Maybe you should confront him and ask him if he is jealous.
Reassure him that you and this other guy share an innocent friendship. Maybe the next time you are too tired to drive home from Dan's, you should phone your other friend and ask him to take you home. This way, everyone will be happy.
I would not recommend dating either because the best friendships are ruined by......sex. Continue keeping both Platonic.
2007-04-11 09:54:52 · answer #6 · answered by Blue Eyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This other friend is jealous and likes you. He doesn't like the fact that you spend time with Dan instead of him and he's worried that you like Dan instead of him. He probably doubts that you didn't do anything with Dan either.
2007-04-11 09:55:05 · answer #7 · answered by Emiline 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's perception. He likes you, but he thinks you are sleeping with this other friend. he is jealous that you sleep over there, but that the subject doesn't come up when you are at his place (if you go there). I would ask him why he thinks something is going on, and why it bothers him. He has a real crush on you, whether you know it or not.
2007-04-11 09:54:02 · answer #8 · answered by Rutger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe for several reasons.
One: Your friend you've known longer is concerned about yoru safety anyway.
Two: He likes you. I mean, likes you.
Three: He's jealous that (just guessing) that you don't spend the night with him, and he feels like you should because you've known him longer, or something.
2007-04-11 09:55:22 · answer #9 · answered by Asterisk 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your other friend likes you and is jealous that you're spending the night at Dan's
2007-04-11 09:54:31 · answer #10 · answered by sirch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sum one likes u, u may not see it, but he cares for u, n is getting jelous at the fact that ur with dan at his house at night and stuff
2007-04-11 09:53:15 · answer #11 · answered by ben g 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋