Large Family?

Question

I am 33 and have two absolutly fab boys aged 17 month and 3 month. I loved being pregnant and love being a mum even more. Material things mean very little to me and I'm all for the children. I'm tempted to try for another at the end of the year but everybody I've spoken to thinks I'm totally mad. Apparently the 3rd child is the one that tips the balance.

Any experience on this?

Answer 1

If you want a large family and can afford it then why worry what others think?

My parents had 7 kids together and done a good job with all of us.
My grandparents had 21 kids together (Back in the day) and they done well also. You can listen to everyone else when it comes to your life and happiness. Good luck

Answer 2

Well I have 5 children and yes it has been and still is hard work, but we manage. The thing that I wish I'd thought about first is getting a career as it's tough trying to get an education now (and expensive). But I do beleive that having them close together is the best thing. Yes it is really hard work and very tiring, but now mine are aged between 8 and 15, all at school and I have been able to go to college. Another 5 or 6 years and I'll be able to get a full time job. My mum had 8 of us and we were quite spaced out. I am 35 and my youngest sister is 15. She is in her late 50's now and having problems with the youngest 2. I am glad that by that time, my children will be grown up and I will have my independence back. I'm really looking forward to having a nice tidy house, going out to work, holidays and having my grandchildren some weekends. So I say to you. Go for it! Do think about it carefully as they do grow up and teenagers can be awful!, But at the same time I wouldn't swap them for anything and if anything happened to any of us then we'll still have ones around. And I'm not going to be lonely when I'm old! Good luck whatever you decide.

Answer 3

I am 38 and have 6 children ages 19,17,15,12,3,2. the older 5 are boys and 2 year old girl. Its hard when there little but I wouldn't of had it any other way .In fact u will notice I have got a ten year gap between children I started all over again. I enjoy having a large family, we all stick 2 gether and help each other out.If everyone thinks your mad then I must b certifiable. no one in this house goes without and Ive got enough love for each and everyone of them. My eldest son is on his 3rd year training to b a vet and is joining the royal veterinary corps in September. My next eldest is at collage training to b a mechanic.I say forget what other people say if you want another baby then u go 4 it.

Answer 4

What a load of rubbish! Third one tips the balance? Total cr*p. Go for it girl, if i could've had more than the one son i and my hubby have we would of had three. If you are in a good relationship and can afford another then why the heck not!!? Take no notice of the small minded thick thinking folk they don't know you and they are not you. I am the same age as you and was told two and a half years ago i could have no more children i and my hubby were heart broken and still find it hard to cope at times.I say Go for it. Good luck sweetie, all the best. xx

Answer 5

You should give your body some time to recover (your body doesn't fully recover til at least 18 months after birth). To be honest you probably should have done that after your first child but 'shoulda woulda coulda'.

Enjoy the children you have, don't miss out on their glorious first couple of years cos you want to prolong having babies around.
How much of their infancy can you possibly enjoy if your time is consumed by either being fat, hard to manouvre and uncomfortable or just cos you're run off your feet with the others.
Ask yourself why are you rushing?

Think about the impact this has on every child you have/will have.
Every child deserves to be spoilt with affection and the centre of your universe for the first couple of years of their life (after that and they gain their independance it's easier to have other children and have them fit in with the family and not disrupt that attention small babies and toddlers need 24/7).
You love your children dearly, so enjoy them, don't give them less of your time (which whether you choose to or not you will undoubtedly be doing). You are still young, there is no need to rush (especially as it wouldn't be rushing to have your first child, you'll always have two and two is more than enough for anyone, some aren't lucky enough to even get one).

I would urge you to rethink your need to keep having babies so rapidly, are you missing something else in life?
Be happy with what you already have, you are incredibly lucky.
Some people never even get that.

Answer 6

The third is a little harder (I have four of my own, my niece everyday during the week) mine are 12, 10, 4, 1 (niece 9) my house is always busy VERY hard work but I adore them all. They always have a couple of friends each round so I have no time for myself, my house is a complete mess, I have no money and seem to spend my time making meals!! BUT I love it love it love!!! I had an older sister 5 years difference and had no one to play with she detested me lol, I even had an imaginary friend that was a balloon how sad! My kids are lovely people I live for them if we were not constrained by space and money I would have loads more!

Go with your heart, it is hard work but if that is really what you want it will be great.

Good Luck. I am 35 by the way and husband is 42. (think he feels the strain more than me!!

Answer 7

Yup!!!!! I had my first child 10 months after I got married, then 2 and half yrs later I had my 2nd. Talking to my older sister one day I told her that being that I am stuck in the house with the 2, I might as well have a 3rd. She advised me against it, but I did as I pleased, and 12 months later I had another my 3rd.

Well I went crazy, by the way they were all boys. The 3rd was colicky. I remember it was august, and we went to a bungalow in the mountains, it was like 100 degrees. The baby wouldn't stop crying day and night, the one year old needed my attention, and the 3 yr old was my only savior as he was a well behaved child.

So all I can say to you is ONE BIG YES, IT DOES TIP THE BALANCE.

By the way I am a mother of 7 boys, always trying for that girl. Now I have grand-daughters. I gave up by number 7. But I wouldn't change the number of children just the space between the 2nd and 3rd. Of course it is your choice. Just gave my opinion cause you asked. Good luck in what ever you do.

Answer 8

If you and your partner are financially able to support more children, go for it. I am the 3rd of 11 children and one of my sister's has 14 children, ranging in age from 26 - 2, all still live at home. One of her daughters is getting married in June and will move out of State. She is very upset that she is loosing a child.

Answer 9

my best friend has 4 shes 35 the kids are 16 14 12 and 2 and they are all amazing, i only have the one at the mo but would love more too. i too have heard that three tips the balance i think cuz of the whole middle child thing...so try for two more lol. good luck as longs as ur kids are happy and healthy then ignore any jibes and u do what u feel is best for you and your family

Answer 10

hi i have 4 kids ,the eldest 13 and the youngest 8 ,sometimes i wish (even though i adore my kids)that i had just had 2 ,all the places you go on hoilday ,day trips all seem to cater for 2 adults ,2 children ,i think if you have 3 there will be a middle child who will seem to think that the eldest or youngest get the attention ,but i havent had any problems but i know people who have ,its your choice and your husbands ,no one elses business ,you love your kids thats all that matters ,and really the third and fourth just seem to fit in around everyone else good luck ,happy babymaking ,i am 33 and have had all mine but still feel broody sometimes xxx

Answer 11

I have 2 boys and will be trying for another one at the end of the year.
I think they say it tips the balance because of the logistics. Like just now I have a 2 bedroom house, but if I have another one then I really would look for a 3 bedroom one. Also things like cars. With the car seat rules you would prob need to have a bigger car. Holidays will cost more.
However.....If you want a big family, have it. I was one of 3, and we didnt have much money when we were younger but I didnt notice. And if you're not into material things then you wont be wasting your money on the next big thing, you will be saving for a family holiday.
I say go for it. I wont be too far behind you
Good luck