Can you recover from rape?

Question

I was raped on the 26th January 2004 when I was 15. I was going out with the guy at the time and we'd been together about 3months when he did this to me.

The only person who knows the full story is my best friend who has been there to support me since then.

I still see the guy who raped me quite often. I've grown to accept what has happened and that helped me through it a lot.

I still get really upset by what has happened and I cry a lot.

I was diagnosed with depression but because I didn't tell my doctor the full story the anti depressants she put me on were not strong enough.

I don't think i'm depressed anymore but I do get really high and low moods.

Does this sound like bi-polar? And will I ever recover from being raped?

Thank you

Answer 1

I was raped 8 years ago. I am still not over it. When I look back at my life since the rape, I can tell you, I am definitely doing better than I was 2 years after. So, I think time is needed. Unfortunately, rape is something many women can never get over. It is a part of us and it can change us. I know that my brother has told me I am not the same person at all anymore. But, it's not always for the worse, believe it or not.

Counseling is something that I needed to get from day 1. I put it off for 5 years. I really wish I could go back and change that because it is the only thing that has really helped me. So, if you don't go to a therapist regularly, you should. It WILL help you become a more emotionally healthy person. I still suffer from PTSD and depression to this day. I have been diagnosed as bipolar II, but I question that. You should learn everything you can about bipolar disorder before you see a doctor and agree to take all the meds he/she will likely want to give you. Make an informed decision.

I wish you the best of luck and feel free to email me anytime.
<3 hugs <3

Answer 2

It sounds more like Bi-polar 2. BP1 has a lot more mania, I know because my brother has 1 and I have 2 and there's more Depression moreso than mania with 2, although nothing as traumatic as what you've experienced has happened to me. But I'm not doctor, so maybe you do have something more severe than Depression or BP2.

And I'm very sorry to hear that this happened to you. No one really fully recovers from a rape but you can get past it and make yourself stronger. My mom was also raped as a teen, among a few other things and she still suffers from it. She's 48 and still has bad nightmares because of what happened, she's scared of going to sleep because it happens in her dreams, and also suffers from Severe Depression and PTSD because of this.

It's not your fault that this happened, and I'm sure you've heard that more times that you can count. I can't offer you any advice because I've never been in your situation, just know that so many other women have experience the same thing. As I said you won't fully recover, but you can make yourself stronger. Hold your chin up and look ahead rather than back.

I know I'm the same way with doctors, they told me I had one thing but I knew it was another as I saw what my brother was like. I never like telling doctors anything because it's like they're trying to pry into your life. Perhaps this is your reason too. But I would try writing a letter. Next time you go to your doctor give them this letter and then explain why you can't tell them everything. I know with me I can explain things a lot better if I write them out.

Hang in there :-)

Answer 3

I would report it to the police, as he may do this to someone else, and the next victim will have a supporting report on the computer database, at the very least (in case it is her word against his that it she gave her consent), even if you state that you could not appear in court, were he to be prosecuted. Then go back to your doctor, discuss the above, and ask to be rediagnosed, (or get a second opinion) and referred for therapy. Be aware that antidepressants/mood stabilisers sometimes have undesirable side effects, including sexual dysfunction, so assess the situation after 5 weeks. Practice for 15 - 20 mins daily, and when needed, the method at http://www.dbtselfhelp.com/ or gaze at a burning candle in a quiet, darkened room for 20 mins, acknowledging stray thoughts and redirecting focus to the process. Maximum effects come from using 3 times, daily, some hours apart. Tai Chi & yoga suits some (http://www.yogasite.com). Work up slowly to 30 - 60 mins of vigorous exercise, preferably in sunlight, keep occupied, eat healthily, and take a vitamin B complex, and 4 fish oil supplements, all the above, daily. See http://www.rainn.org/ & www.rape-victim-support.com Phone: [phone] HOPE & also view http://www.anxiety-and-depressions.com & http://www.beattheblues.info/? & http://www.dbsalliance.org Phone [phone] & see www.bipolarworld.net Memories tend to fade with time. Hypnotherapy is worth considering, if you are fairly suggestible.

Answer 4

Of course you can recover from being raped. It requires courage, however, because you do need to tell some one, a therapist, a rape survivor group, someone who has gone through it. Recovery means that you can get through it, get past it, and not have it define your life. It does not mean that it will not matter to you, or that you will forget about it.
If you find some treatment for Post Traumatic Stress, something called EMDR, you can help yourself deal with the immediate effects of the rape.
I am so sorry that this happened to you, but it is so good that you are finding the strength to deal with it!

Answer 5

First of all, you won't become bi-polar from a trauma. Find a trusted counselor (shop around until you find someone you are comfortable talking to), then talk about it. It's called a "catharsis" when you get all of the stuff of your chest. Talking is very, very therapeutic. I was almost killed during a mugging in 1991: I was a walking time-bomb for a year, just looking to jack up the very first person who crossed me. I finally confided in a proffessor of mine who was also a therapist. She helped me immensely. I no longer hated the world , and was able to finally come to terms with the anger... and it sounds to me as if, underneath all of the upset, you just might be an angry person too. Go to therapy... it really helps.

Answer 6

It's so sad to read your story the fact that you are very young when that happened. Well, I salute you for solving your problem alone. What I can say is try to forget what happened to you by doing what you know is best for you.Excel in your career or in your study, make your experience as a challenge to do more good in your life because the more you are depressed the more you are just making your life mesirable.Hope this little advised of mine have helped you.

Answer 7

You will recover from this. Unfortunately I work in this field and its not always easy to handle this kind of situation. You may want to seek counsiling for your feelings, depression is definitely nothing to ignore. There are alot of groups out there that are made up of females and yes males who have gone through the same thing as you, it may be good to join a group like that just so you have someone to talk to and can relate. You may also want to talk to your doctor about getting a stronger anti-depressant if you are feeling any kind of anxiety. Trust me there are so many people out there in the world who don't speak up and they are the one's you read about in the morning paper. I wish you alot of luck with dealing with this but there are alot of people out there that can help you get over this and move on with your life.

Answer 8

omigod...i'm laughing but only because this happened to me last year! and it's been driving me nuts. sometimes i have weeks where i don't eat and some weeks when i'm really happy. sometimes i'm really depressed and it takes me half a day to get ready to go out (anywhere!) i just went to a treatment center and i was going nuts a while ago. i guess i'm okay now. just saying i think that happens to everyone? i didn't tell anyone until a year later. his friends are my friends. no one really knows and he goes to my school. yay! when i saw him last week, it rattled me. i was already accepting it all happened and now i have to look at "proof" (e.g. journal entries, text messages, etc.) i hope it's normal.
i hear you never get over it. i hope you kind of do. and no you are not bi-polar. that's something else. you're just depressed because of what happened.
you will recover...

Answer 9

yes you can recover from rape. i was almost raped by a guy at school but i fought him off and told him no and i guess he got the message and left me alone. he was sweet and seemed incoent til that one day when we met each other in the halll. Ever sincet then it was hard for me to trust guys, but i had to transfer schools because i didn't want to see him. no one knows except for a few. but i still get really bad flashbacks of that day. but no i don't take medicane i just try not to think about it. but yes you will reover and though its tougf right now in the end it'll make you a stronger person. but i would sjest to tell your doc beause you need the right mediation

Answer 10

Yes, you can recover. But I would advise you to go and see a professional therapist, to whom you can tell the truth, that is, the whole story. Therapists are like priests in this way, they are not allowed (by their professional ethics) to tell anyone else your story. So, you can be confident and relaxed about that. And it would mean a lot to you to talk about that (to someone else except your friend, especially to a pro) and to get it all out of you.
Good luck, dear.