racial slurs against her boyfriend?
2007-04-10 13:08:30 · 15 answers · asked by judy f 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The only way to make amends is by showing your effort to change your behavior. You first have admit your wrong ("I'm sorry I'm racist, I know it's wrong, I'm going to _______ to change) You have to find someway to educate yourself on cultural differences. The root of racism is ignorance. It will take a while for her to forgive you I think.
2007-04-10 13:18:28 · answer #1 · answered by Mike M. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It seems that everyone is always apologizing for racial slurs and statements these days, if the things were not said then no apology would be needed.
I have been upset before and know how hard it is to not say anything hurt full when I get angry, but it is harder for me to blurt out racism because of anger.
If a person doesn't live with racism then they are less likely to even in anger say things that are inappropriate, but when one thinks it and never voices it then when anger hits they say it out loud.
Apologize to her, but don't expect her to get over the hurt you caused.
2007-04-10 20:24:30 · answer #2 · answered by Marla D 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
All you can do is apologize and tell her that you are going to make a huge effort to choose carefully the words that you use. Also make an effort to look at those of a different race in a positive way. She will probably still be mad at you, and maybe for quite a while, but if you try to change your attitude towards those of different races, she will eventually forgive you. The first step is to try and communicate with her.
2007-04-10 20:13:48 · answer #3 · answered by blue_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, why did you make the slurs? Is he a different race and you do not approve? Why do or do you not approve of him?
You need to evaluate your feelings and understand yourself before you can expect your daughter to understand you. Next, you need to apologize for the wrong you did. Next, if you cannot approve of her boyfriend for another reason than his race, explain this to your daughter in a calm, reasonable manner.
How old is your daughter? If she is an adult who supports herself and is not under your roof, you cannot expect her to obey you any more. Offer your opinion, but respect and accept hers.
If she is still under your care, you are responsible for her and her decisions that will impact her life. Decide what is important to you, and stand by your decisions. If you are not going to do this, you should not deny it in the first place. Do what is best for her, and not what is easiest for you.
2007-04-10 20:26:14 · answer #4 · answered by wbecca52 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It depends on what was said. Just let her know that, you feel guilty for what you said and would hope that she does not hold it against you. After all she is your daughter, she loves you and probably feels a little hurt. But she will forgive you in time, she will understand that you may have just been upset that day. Good luck =)
2007-04-10 20:14:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well obviously something is bothering you about her boyfriend other than his race. Ask yourself why you made those comments and be honest with your daughter. If you are honest, you can talk about your feelings and maybe you will come to an understanding.
2007-04-10 20:12:39 · answer #6 · answered by rmu07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
talk to her about and find the REAL reason you said those things. maybe beacuse you just dont like the guy and thats the only bad thing you can find about him. my mother did that about my best friend for two years and i finally told her to leave me alone. im still friends with the girl but not as close, and my mom and i sure lost something in our relationship because she couldnt just support me, my friends, decisions, or choices. let her learn on her own, and let her judje her boyfriend on the way he treats her, not on his religion/heritage. hope it helped!
2007-04-10 20:14:29 · answer #7 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well coming from me a black women I think you should start by making mends with her boyfriend then she should see you r trying to learn from your mistakes...well good luck and remember its 2007 we got other thing to worry about
2007-04-10 20:16:15 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Apologise to your daughter and maybe invite him over for dinner. Be nice to him and ask him questions about his life and his family to show you are interested in him and show that you care.
2007-04-10 20:12:24 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Communication is always the key to any problem. Talk it out with her.
2007-04-10 20:13:16 · answer #10 · answered by dakota_gal_1968 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋