My 5 yr.old daughter is being bullied either in school or it's by someone we know. Help!?

Question

Here are some more details-I noticed the bruises on her arms one day (they are not your typical I feel at recess bruises either). when I asked her what happened she told me that she could not tell me and started to cry. I have tried to sit her down and talk to her and tell her that I can't help her or protect her unless she tells me. Personally I don't think it has anything to do w/my parenting skills if I didn't care I wouldn't be asking for help(kevil). I'm a concerned mother who has never dealted w a bullie hurting my child.

Answer 1

Speak to your daughter's headmaster/mistress immediately and don't be fobbed off...The effects can last for a lifetime, so I would suggest you deal with it ASAP.
I am from England so don't know about anti-bullying organisations in the USA, but would advise you to search for them on-line and to contact them for advice.
I don't understand what you mean by saying "or it's by someone we know", so I'm not sure how to answer that.
Talk to your daughter calmly and make sure she knows that it isn't her fault at all and that she can tell you who is bullying her and that you will do your best to make sure it stops. Try not to be too emotional when you are doing this, as she needs to focus on herself when she is doing this and not on you.

Answer 2

Since your daughter is only 5 she would have very little unsupervised time,if any.Sit down with your daughter and try to ask her again about what happpened.Discuss with her the importance of telling you when there is a problem.Also discuss with her the fact neither children or adults should encourage her to keep secrets from you. I would then contact her teacher and ask if she is aware of any problems with your daughter and another child.Let the teacher know yoou have concerns about bruises on her arm and how they got there.These bruises could be caused by children grabbing and tugging so it may be innocent.You will know her after school contacts so try be vigilant in watching how she mixes with these people.She may give you subtle clues that she is afraid of someone.Has her behaviour changed with any of her contacts? Hopefully it will all turn out well. Good luck.

Answer 3

My daughter was being bullied (5 yrs old) as well. She was not being hit but threats were made if she didn't give 2 boys in her class a quarter every day. She almost would not want to go to school if i refused to give her 75 cents. I knew 25 cents were needed for juice break so I put the connection together. I didn't really ask her I went with her to school, spoke with her teacher and her teacher got to the bottom of it.
No problems at all now. Good Luck

Answer 4

I would start by discussing your concerns with a teacher at school. He/she may be aware of your child being picked on by somebody that they've not informed you of, thinking that it had not escalated to the point of physical harm. Then they can keep an eye out for any abusive behaviors. If you can rule that out, I would start questioning her using names of anyone and everyone u can think of that she's had contact with. You may be able to notice a change in demeanor when the culprit's name is mentioned. If you can't ferret out the answer that way I would get her into counseling. They have ways of getting kids to talk that us parents can't seem to do. Good Luck!

Answer 5

If you think it's going on at school then you need to go see the teacher and find out what's happening. It doesn't sound normal at all for a 5 year old to not talk to their mommy about what happened to them. My daughter is also 5 and I hear about it every time one of her friends say "I'm not your friend any more" which happens alot with little girls. Something is really wrong! If you have to take her to see someone that she can talk to other then you. Good Luck.

Answer 6

Get her out of there. They have small classes run by women who have done home schooling for a long time. Kids who get bullied are in there and they do so much better.
Keep her in school and eventually she will resent the treatment and lash out or quit school and the pain she is suffering. My girl friend was one of those children and she said it was so painful. Then in high school she quit and almost went into drugs and other problems.
Went to a night class later and got her GED by working on computers then took a accounting class by a VOTECH school for adults.
NOw she runs a company and makes a good salery.
She never passed but very few classes in grammar school or high school.

Answer 7

If it is happening at school you can always go up to the school and observe don't make it clear whose mother you are and see if you can't catch the bully in the act

If it is happening at home just keep a very close eye on your daughter maybe eventually she'll open up to you

GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

You are a good mother to be so concerned about this matter, but you need to go to the school and see whats going on over there. Even more so make sure that it is not an adult in the school abusing your child. I know ot sounds bad but it does happen.

Answer 9

Call the school..if that's where it's happening..ask if they noticed any bullying...or ask your daughter (tell her that she will not be in trouble if she tells). If she does not reveal it...then it may be someone u know, as she could be protecting them. Pray for God's wisdom...and then act, and u will be granted success. James 1:5

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. (him in this verse in Greek means both sexes)

God won't over-ride a person's free-will and that's why bad things happen in this world. All he is waiting for is u to ask, again it's a free-will issue...he will not force himself upon u.
Free-will can be a blessing or a curse.

God bless you and your daughter, and may his perfect will be done in this situation.

Daniel
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Answer 10

Please take the time to schedule an appointment with your daughter's teacher. This could have lasting effects on her. At five, she may still be too young to put together all her thoughts to you. I have a child in kindergarten, and she tell me "everything and them some." But not all children interact all the same. So please, discuss this with her teacher. No need to tell her you are going to set up the appointment w/ her teacher either. That could cause her to withdraw even more. If you feel you are not getting anywhere with her teacher, please schedule with the principle.