Are you a perfectionist? I'm a perfectionist and I want to stop !! How do you deal with your perfectionism?

Answer 1

No, I could not stand the pressure.
I like a little clutter in my life...keeps me on my toes.

Answer 2

Counseling and self-help books. I had elements of perfectionism and could be pretty hard on myself. It helped to learn that I had a finite amount of energy and time. If you try to do everything perfectly, you'll end up achieving very little. It is better to priortize what things you want to invest a lot of energy in, what things matter some, and what things you can let go of completely.

Talking with a counselor can help to identify some specific patterns that you have with your perfectionism. Investing some time & energy in that could yield long term benefits that could leave you enjoying your life a lot more. Counseling also helps with identifying what you really value and then prioritizing where to spend your energy.

As a starter, you can start noticing whenever you use the ideas "should", "ought" and "must" in your thinking. Those are often a source of perfectionism and suffering. It's all about changing the way you think.

Good luck.

Answer 3

I am a freakin' Leo-anal-retentive-perfectionist! Yes, I hate it, too. Start with one thing at a time. Ask yourself can I leave this the way it is? Will it be accepted anyway? How much time will I waste to perfect this when I could be doing something else really worth while that will make me happy or be with someone else who I really care about? Whom will I hurt by having to do this project over or take the time to align everything correctly? Once you let something go and NOT perfect it. It's actually very freeing. Try it once a day at first.

Remember to breath and relax. Perfectionism comes from stress and insecurity. You are where you should be at this time in your life at this very moment. Relax enjoy it. You can learn great things from your mistakes.

Exercise: Get a coloring book and crayons and colors things in weird colors, outside of the lines. Try it! It will help.

PS: I just spelled checked this 3 times. hehe

Answer 4

I am a HUGE perfectionist. HUGE!!! I have tried to back off some. And I did this by telling myself there are somethings that don't need to be perfect. The world will not come to an end if I don't get this just right. And if it does, oh well.

Answer 5

You need to accept that there is no such thing as perfect. I have to tell myself this many times a day. Life is too short for the stress that perfectionism creates.
So what if the house isn't perfect. It is clean.
And also remember that you are your own worst critic. No one else pays as much attention to your appearance as you do. Realize that most people don't care. They like you for you - not because of the way your hair or outfit looks.
I'm not saying don't do a good job or don't look nice. Just realize that you need to lay off of yourself because like I said before, there is no such thing as perfect.

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong with perfection! I figure do things right the first time so I don't need to waste my time doing it over. Why do you want to stop? People comment on my habits all the time I like things in order and I want things the way I want them. I also have a real annoying germ problem, thats a compulsive disorder and they do have meds for that. And I am afraid of horses because they have big heads and eyes.

Answer 7

Thanks for asking this question. It made me find the answer which I also need.

To overcome perfectionism one needs to:
accept self as a human being
forgive self for mistakes or failings
put self back on the wagon immediately after falling off
accept that the ``ideal'' is only a guideline or goal to be worked toward, not to be achieved 100%
set realistic and flexible time frames for the achievement of a goal
develop a sense of patience and to reduce the need to ``get it done yesterday''
be easier on oneself; setting unrealistic or unreasonable goals or deadlines sets you up for failure
recognize that the human condition is one of failings, weakness, deviations, imperfections, and mistakes; it is acceptable to be human
recognize that one's backsliding does not mean the end of the world; it is OK to pick oneself up and start all over again
develop an ability to use ``thought stopping'' techniques whenever you find yourself mentally scolding yourself for not being ``good enough''
visualize reality as it will be for a ``human'' rather than for a ``super human''
learn to accept yourself the way you are; let go of the ideas of how you ``should be''
enjoy success and achievement with a healthy self-pride, and eliminate the need for self deprecation or false humility
learn to enjoy success without the need to second guess your ability to sustain the achievement
reward yourself for your progress, to reinforce your efforts to change even when progress is slight or doesn't meet up to your idealistic expectations
love yourself; to believe that you deserve good things
to eliminate unrealistic expectations and the idea that you are infallible
visualize yourself as ``winning'' even when it takes more energy, and more perseverance, than what you had planned
let go of rigid, moralistic judgments of your performance and to develop an open, compassionate understanding for the hard times, obstacles, and temptations
be flexible in setting goals and be willing to reassess your plan from time to time to keep things realistic
be open to the idea that you will be successful in your efforts to change, even if you are not ``first,'' ``the best,'' ``the model,'' ``the star pupil,'' `` the exemplar,'' `` the finest''
realize that the important thing is to be going in a positive direction

Answer 8

No i am not a perfectionist, but i do like things done my way you need to let others do things for you and accept those things even if it is driving you mad.

Answer 9

its hard being a perfectionist, to deal with it is to try not to be one
its hard but it will help if u try to understand the deepest meaning of life
if u believe in the bible then its good to study the word, it will help u alot
trust me

Answer 10

I have gotten to the point in my 50's that I procrastinate a lot because I feel like I don't have the energy or time to get everything done perfectly so I feel like why bother? LOL

Answer 11

If we stop and ask ourselves why and who are we trying to impress, we usually find that is for self gratification and for others to see. It takes time to get over the practice of thinking everything has to be perfect.