Im not very good with words. oral or written. He stole a hat today at school. 6mos ago he took something to school against the rules. I have to sit him for the next 2 days. I'm his Gpa. i'm widowed. Since my wife passed on. and before. we have spoilded them and sent them home, But. this is different. His mom says I am to let him know that he has done wrong. She has to work. And I will. BUT, to what extent? He is my oldest Gchild out of 6.
And the last thing I refuse to do is push any of them away from me. We have all 6 gotten along just great. I've never (almost) had to raise my voice to them, they just know what I expect from them. They ask. and I say OK. Not always, but they just know that it will be OK for them to at their age. I don't know why I am asking for help, because my Siberian will undo everything I try to do. They're like 2 peas in a pod. They love each other. That's good. Please excuse my poor sentencing. But I hope you understand my position. Need advise soon Thanx
2007-04-09 13:33:37 · 5 answers · asked by I feel better 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
Bound's hubby here:
Sir, you sound very much like the man my grandfather was. I think if you use your relationship that you have already built, you can get to the bottom of your grandson's problems. I think between you and your Siberian, your grandson will be turned around.
Your grandson's suspension is serious. Theft is something that should not be minimized. Also, you mention that he took something inappropriate to school earlier this school year. In my opinion, it sounds like he is seeking some form of attention, and you are the male figure that could give it to him.
I would suggest he not view his period of suspension as a vacation. Try to hold him to his academics. Require him to do his lessons so he does not fall behind in class, but when he is done his lessons, you should continue to bond with him. Do the things he is accustomed to doing with Grandpa. Talk to him. Let him tell you what is the problem. Don't push. Treat him like Grandpa always has.
Bottom line, be firm, but fair. He has always respected you. He will continue to respect you.
Good luck.
2007-04-09 14:24:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A full time 30 y.o. father here of a 10 y.o. boy. I personally would "steal" something of his. What does he cherish the most? Perhaps a video game? Just take it without his knowing. He will get bent over it surely. Then answer him with "Well, someone must have stole it." Eventually give it back.
It would sound harsh to some but I have grown up in the 'when you do something wrong, you get beat' time and I don't believe in the nonsence of parenting today when a timeout should be 1 minute for every year old they are. That doesn't work. They need to be put in their place from day one. If that hasn't been done, the years to come will only be that much harder to correct.
My son knows right from wrong. Never raised his voice to me or answered back, etc. All I do is change the tone of my voice and that alone scares him if he happens to get out of line.
2007-04-09 13:47:52 · answer #2 · answered by thomboucher51 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know being an older man you might not want to discipline your grandson but if you don't get him straightened out he will end up in Juvenile Detention and you will lose him for a bit of time. He needs to know their are consequences for every action and he needs to deal with whatever it is that has him doing things he knows by now is wrong. As a minister I say don't let him watch TV the two days you have him, instead make him work in your yard and make him clean out your gutters but give him some structure. Don't give in to him no matter what it won't help him.
2007-04-09 14:25:08 · answer #3 · answered by Georgia Preacher 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would personally sit down with him and let him know you still love him but what he did was wrong and you are disappointed in him. Let him know its NOT ok to steal and how would he feel if someone stole somethng he cared about from him. This is what I would do. I hope it helps and good luck. You seem like a wonderful grandfather.
2007-04-09 13:41:34 · answer #4 · answered by Melissa H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would sit him down and tell him that stealing could lead to alot of trouble and that it was wrong that he did that. Don't tell him he is bad for doing that. Just explain that what he did was bad.
2007-04-09 15:59:19 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋