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Hello my wife keeps yelling at me telling me she hates me and cant stand me. She says i do nothing and dont help her, that it was a mistake to marry me, that my kids hate me, that i dont make enough money and i should make more for her, that i cant tell her what to do because she doesnt want another dad. I cant show any emotions or talk to her because men that cry or get upset are a turn off to her. I love her to death and think about her all the time, she is my entire life. I dont know why she does this. I work 60 hours a week, I work after hours at home. I work all the time so we have money to enjoy ourselfs and live the life she wants. I gave her $50000 sports car and as much things as i can. I hate working all the time and wish i was with her. I dont go out at all or see my friends much anymore. I only pretty much work now. She seems to enjoy her friends more then me. She has been out with them 3 weeks in a row. Am i doing something wrong please help

2007-04-09 00:56:11 · 20 answers · asked by luke52181932 1 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

20 answers

Which part of her are you crazy about? She is controling and yet expects you to be macho man, which you obviously are not. I am with you on that. There are women out there that love men who show their emotions. Do not waste your time on a woman who expects a macho man provider.

Look at what you have said in your question. You bought her an overpriced sports car and yet she still wants more. She will always want more and you will never be able to provide enough and you will always be unhappy.

What you need to do is to get away from her and find a girl who loves you for who you are. Find a girl who is not looking for a man with a big bank account and macho attitude. Because behind every macho attitude is an unhappy little boy.

Take care,
Troy

2007-04-09 01:20:13 · answer #1 · answered by tiuliucci 6 · 0 0

You aren't the one who is wrong. She is a selfish manipulative *****! She isn't showing you any love at all. You need to stand up for yourself. You need to let her know you are trying and if that isn't enough she can walk. You deserve so much more than what you are getting from her. From what you described I wonder if she has a depression problem or a self esteem issue of some kind. People you can't do enough for usually have some flaw that can be helpedmedically. I wouldn't put up with it anymore. You sound miserable. How can you love a woman who doesn't return that love? Your kids are very smart. They see what is going on. You need to do something as she will teach your children to treat their spouses the same way when they marry some day. Try getting her to agree to go to counseling with you. She may need to hear from an impartial person what a ***** she has been. My father let 2 wives run over him and us kids always called him a mouse not a man. How do you want your kids to see you> A mouse or a man who keeps his life in order. It isn't going to be easy to stand up-but it is something you are going to have to do or she will run all over you and before you know it you will be an 80 year old man looking back with regrets and not memories.

2007-04-09 01:05:56 · answer #2 · answered by Stefbear 5 · 1 0

If she is a material driven person the worst thing you can do is work 24x7 to support it, because the value of money means nothing to her.

Time to take control of the finances, and cancel any joint credit cards you have. If she wants something tell her it's time to get a job to pay for the things she wants. It's likely to become like WW III in your house during this conversation but stick to your guns and if your marriage is going to survive she needs to let you slow down and pick up some of the slack.

You need to slow down and start spending time with the kids, they are the real victims in this.

The other problem is if you're working all the time to support her spending habits, she's going to clean your clock in divorce court with the whole "he was never there for me or the family" sob story.

2007-04-09 04:02:26 · answer #3 · answered by Zaferus 6 · 0 0

Maybe your wife is shouting and screaming at you because you ARE working so much. Tell her you need to talk and that you are really hurting over your situation, if she sees you cry perhaps she will understand more what you are going through too. It seems that she is doing all the enjoying and she maybe wants to share it more with you. Its unfair to drag your kids into this but perhaps she cannot express herself any other way - the kids need to see their dad too. Above all do not get drawn into a slanging match as this will only make things worse - good luck!

2007-04-09 01:04:26 · answer #4 · answered by willt246 2 · 0 0

well now what you do is take control be like b***** you get a job, you work. Its not a turn off to you if shes yellin at you? Yell back. You work enough as it is, take a vacation.... spend time with your kids and dont let what she says about them get to you find out for yourself. Your doing alot of things wrong, shes taking control. Either way if you make her happy or not shes going to "hate" you. So work less, go out with your friends, treat the kids good and maybe she'll be less bitchy and see that you can be a great father and love you for that. If anything treat her like a kid, you got the car take it away and be like see I do do **** for you now respect what I do or you aint getting nothing from me. "I love you but I dont see that comming from you" < kinda mindset.

2007-04-09 01:22:03 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Yea, quit giving in to her. Don't just roll over when she wants something. Obviously that isn't working. Next time she wants something tell her NO. Make her go out and work and see how much fun it is to put 60 hours in and come home to someone yelling at you. Start cutting back on expenses so that you don't have to work so much. Tell her what you want also. Don't spoil her so much.

2007-04-09 03:20:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Its sounds like your wife is a money hungry B***H. To be honest, it doesn't sound like she deserves you. It sounds like she is just using you for your money and to bring the kids into your arguements is just mean. If you want to know how your children feel about you, ask them, not her. I'm sure they love you, you're their daddy. As for your wife, kick her to the curb, or at least go to counseling. If you love her, and she loves you too, then you can make it work, but it will take time and a real commitment to make it work. I hate to admit this, but some women can be selfish and materialistic. sounds like that's the type of woman you have there. Personally, I think you'd be happier finding someone who appreciated you and your hard work (and that $50000 sports car!!)

2007-04-09 01:30:12 · answer #7 · answered by braves, yankees & saints fan 3 · 1 0

I think you have a very selfish wife and I feel that you would be happier without her. I am sorry to say this because you seem to love her very much but somethings need to be said and heard no matter how hard it may be. I am sorry that you are having difficulties and being treated badly by someone that you love and I hope that you find the answer to you problem. Good Luck!

2007-04-09 01:36:39 · answer #8 · answered by snugglesrn 2 · 0 0

first of all, you sound noticeably sparkling. Now i'm no longer one to promote divorce, nor am I one to promote consciously finding out on to stay unhappy. each and everything else aside (affair and so on)...in case you've been to stroll out correct this second, could you've any regrets? Is there something left to salvage? have you ever tried counseling? have you ever tried asking her what she needs more advantageous of or a lot less of contained in the marriage and from you? have you ever shared your feeling at the same time with her and requested her if she's prepared to be your spouse in revitalizing your marriage (presented you could forgive her and flow your self previous the affair). ultimately, after I went via my personal divorce there replaced right into a era the position i replaced into in limbo and couldnt fathom the concept-about sharing my little ones throughout the time of vacation journeys and so on. Ultimatly, it got here all the way down to the actual incontrovertible actuality that i could not abdomen the potential for having my 3 babies witness an unhappy marriage, and repeat it of their personal lives (all of us know babies study what they stay, no longer unavoidably what we tell them). Plus, I had an unwilling spouse to artwork on it. After 4 years of attempting each and every perspective, i desirous to leave. I had, and characteristic under no circumstances had any regrets (plus, I now get excitement from a good courting with my ex). once you come across each and every perspective and take a inspect each and everything, the answer will come to you. Be careful of any assumptions you may have about divorce or staying married, like "my daughter will be ruined/damaged for life", "our marriage can under no circumstances be an similar", and so on....stay open to miracles...both way! I really have lived them, and that i know you may also.

2016-11-27 21:02:52 · answer #9 · answered by gallichio 4 · 0 0

"Am I doing something wrong?"

Yes, yes yes oh yes.

You only live once. Don't be a slave to a wage.

Your kids will still have a relationship with you and without all the distractions of an unhappy marriage.

I'm not saying she should be bringing you an open beer and changing the channel for you. If my other half yelled at me she would be sleeping at her mother's.

2007-04-09 01:21:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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