Abstract punishment or showing litteral reason why its wrong.?

Question

Ie kids playing with matches/ gets caught joyriding etc.


Ground/slap/other punishment


Or time in burns wards or broaght to a pile up with people dying and made to watch why joyriding is bad?

Type thing.

Similar to teaching about drugs making them watch somone go cold turkey.

Answer 1

I wouldnt use any of the punishments you suggest on a child playing with matches.Explain WHY we dont play with matches, what can happen, how everyone can get hurt. At the end of the day its up to us parents to keep matches out of the reach of children. If they get hold of then thats our fault isnt it ? I`m a mother of nine children and have always kept matches, scissors, sharp knives etc on really high shelves. You have to remember also that children with this type of problem usually have some underlying reason for it - there is usually a problem in the home if the child has resorted to playing with matches. I know my kids would never be left alone long enough to get matches and cause destruction at a young age. In cases where there have been house fires caused by youngsters, odds are high its early morning, mother is in bed and kids are up and restless. Good parenting is what`s missing in a lot of cases - not punishment.

Answer 2

Wow...where to begin? Here are a few simple ones: 1 Timothy 2:5 says that God gave his son Jesus as a mediator for men. The Witnesses teach that Jesus is only the mediator for anointed Jehovah's Witnesses. So according to the Witnesses (and in contradiction of this plainly-worded scripture), Jesus is not a mediator for members of the "other sheep." 1 Cor. 14:34-35 plainly and clearly forbids women from speaking in church. The Witnesses do not follow this command. They allow women to give certain parts on meetings. 1 Cor. 4:6 says not to go beyond what is written. The Watchtower organization (JW leadership) has created a giant body of ecclesiastical law, all of which is "beyond what is written." The Watchtower has banned numerous things with no Biblical basis, such as facial hair on men, sending a Mother's Day card, and certain intimate acts between married couples. Further, what about the organization's long and illustrious record of false prophecies (1914, 1918, 1925, "generation of 1914," etc.)? Why in the world would God pick an organization that continually falsely prophesies the end of the world? Jesus warned about false prophets during his ministry, so why would God pick a group that does the very thing Jesus warned about? Makes ZERO sense.

Answer 3

It's a great technique if used within reason. For example, I tell my 4 year old son to not run in the house. Instead of minding me he keeps on running, trips and falls and hits his head on the doorway going into his room. It hurt but it didn't traumatize him. I looked at him and said "that's why we don't run in the house".

No matter how much we desire to save our children from being hurt they are going to want to learn the hard way, the same way we all learned, by making mistakes. Sometimes making a mistake causes physical pain sometimes emotional, sometimes it's pain to you and sometimes it's pain to others.

A kid playing with matches is a very serious issue and if they are young, I wouls say a paddling is in order along with a complete explanation as to why it's wrong.

When my oldest started getting on the internet I took her to a site that educates children on the dangers of the internet. It had true stories from other kids who had seriously bad internet encounters, I showed her how an IP address can be traced. She thought she was safe and could do anything on the internet but now she is the one educating her friends.

Answer 4

depends on the age of the child. a younger one, say under 10, is only going to be frightened by showing them the true consequences of their actions.i don't think they will put the two together. however, if we're talking someone 12-maybe 17, then i think time volunteering in a burn ward,homeless or battered women's shelter or even a home for accident victims who are permanently disabled and/or mentally handicapped, is a great idea. at that age, it hits home.

Answer 5

There is a videoclip for ELO's Mr Blue Sky on YouTube. My 3.5 year old loves that song. So i was a bit shocked and wasn't sure how to deal with what happened at the end. Now i have told her it is what happens when you cross the road and don't Stop, Look and Listen when crossing the road. She can relate to it in the real world, she is starting to comprehend what's happening.
Have a look: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xisqn-RISi4

Answer 6

I dont particularly have anything against it within reason - they are only children mind.

When im looking after my little sister (11) I will tell her dont do this because this will happen.

Eg - you must wear a seatbelt because this is what will happen if you dont.

But I dont think for example if she burnt herself and ended up in hospital (bad babysitting on my part if she did) that id say this is a good lesson for you to learn, I think its much better for her to be told than to be put through it, or shown disturbing photos etc.

But just because I wouldnt, all situations and children are different and need to be taught in diff ways. Respect to parents and their ways of controling their kids. x

Answer 7

i dont think someone playing with matches should be shown someone burnt etc, if this is what your asking?

this would just give them nightmares, not teach them not to do it.

punishment doesn't always work,im not saying let them off depends what they've done really

lets take an example, someone goes missing for a few hours
why would you want to punish them? as long as there safe and well is all that matters
JUST TALK to them and explain your concerns and ask them not to do it again

talking usually is better then punishment

well its always worked with my kids

but all kids are different

whats good for one is not going to work with another,

trying to stop them smoking is ONLY going to make them want to smoke more, etc like trying to ground them, there going to defy you and get out some how

Answer 8

if my daughters where in sight ofmatches i would say we dont play with matchs light one and say because it is fire and its hot so it hurts

we where areseat belt in the car because its dangerous not to and it is naughtey and police men get cross when they see you with no seat belton that always works i dont think i would go to the extreme of what you havedescribed but if my daughters were doing somthing like running in the house i say dont run in the house if they kept going and hurt them selfs i just say see this is why we dont run in he house and we do as mummy says then take careof them

Answer 9

definately abstract otherwise you become the doer and if something goes wrong there is no turning back

Answer 10

mm sounds like you expert no ......short sharp punishment better than long drawing out Chinese torture or do gooders analogue your choice