Words of advice?

Question

I look happy on the outside but I feel ...hollow..on the inside. I feel down on myself wondering how dare I be unhappy for what I have. Am I a bad person? I have a great family and I love them very much...but sometimes I wonder if they would be better off without me. I would never consider suicide as I don't want to die but how good can I be for them if I don't even like myself? I feel hopeless, unaccomplished and stuck in a rut. I am completely uninspired on how to change my perspective. I am overwhelmed by worry...I worry about everything constantly.
Does anyone have any words of wisdom or know of anything I can read to try to help my scrambled self? Is it possible that I am depressed or am I just unambitious and ungrateful?
I don't need any snide comments or remarks please. I am hard enough on myself without anyone making it worse.

Thank you so much to everyone who responded. Your kind words and thoughts mean so much. Everyone had such heartfelt advice...Thank you all...

Answer 1

I know how you feel. I have had the same problem off and on for years. I tried medication, didn't work. Seen Therapists, helped a little.
What helped me the most is Affirmations and Visualization.
Breathing exercises.
Getting out and doing things even if I didn't feel like it.
Try to find something that makes you feel better about your self. get a new hair cut. Buy new cloths....
Although if you suffer from clinical Depression, you really need to see a Doctor.
But in the mean time. Look up affirmations and repeat them every morning and when you are feeling down say them again.
You are not a bad person nor are you ungrateful.
You are a good person with great values. I can tell by your question.
Best of luck. I will look to see if I can find some affirmations for you. You also might try a relaxation tape with visualization.

Answer 2

Search for the other question, "what causes depression" and read my answer there. I really believe that most depression is caused by a lack of ambition and lack of sunlight. Birds absorb vitamin D-3 through their feathers from the sunlight. I would guess that people need it too, to stabilize mood hormones. That would explain seasonal affective disorder. I also think that a lot of people lack insight as to why we are here. We are each given about a hundred years on this planet for the sole purpose of finding our way to happiness. We figure out what we want the world to remember us for and do it. If we aren't working towards that goal, we do feel hopeless, unaccomplished, and stuck in a rut. Even religious people have on some level, an awareness that once our time on Earth is done, it's done. Life on Earth is goal-oriented, time-limited, and pass or fail. If we do nothing to leave it a better place, we have accomplished nothing, and wasted our only chance to make our lives worthwhile. Deep down, we are all aware of that. We just have to do something about it. Figure out what mark you want to leave on the world when your time is done, and work toward it. Good luck.

Answer 3

I guess there are a few things that you can do.. 1) talk with a councilor, and try some anti-depression medicine. 2) read some self-help books on improving your self-esteem. 3) do things that will build your confidence, Martial Arts is a great way. Most importantly just remember you are a valued member of your family and society. A little trick that I have had girlfriends do in the past, is stand in front of the mirror, and repeat "I love Myself" "I'm beautiful" and then list things that you like about yourself.. You may have to sit down and write it out, but really do it, and see what happens. This has always worked for the ones I love, not to mention that I cont- on giving them compliments, and build on there self-esteem. Just try it.

Answer 4

a phrase that has stuck with me for a few years now -

"why just ebb days from your life, when you can add life to your days. Life is for living, do just that"

instead of worrying about how to change your perspective on life, what can you do to change it, why am i so depressed etc?

do subtle little things every day, maybe a walk, read a book, cook a meal for friends, have a film night - anything that detracts away from the usual routine.

I'll be honest - i hit a phase in my life with heavy drink, drugs, debt, isolated from the outside world, this lasted for about 4 years and i gradually got myself out of the hole - its not too hard if you dont try to do everything all at once,

dont dwell on the past, that cant be changed - just think of what could be if you did something differently

Answer 5

A Cry for Help ...
http://watchtower.org/e/20000915/article_01.htm

Many people have felt like 'throwing in the towel' at times.
I have myself, for several years. I had traditional treatment, but it never got to the root of the problem. The only thing that pulled me through those rough times was my hope --based on actual Bible prophecy.

Actually , the advice in the Bible has never been 'one-upped'!
And the following links will take one to several non-preachy Bible-based discussions on the subjects you have 'voiced' concern about:

The Bible--A Textbook for Living
- A Book That Gives Purpose
- Adding Stability to a Troubled Life
- Help in Overcoming Emotional Problems
- Practical Counsel of Family Life
- Counsel That Endures! http://watchtower.org/e/20001201/article_02.htm

How to Find Real Happiness
- Think of Your Spiritual Needs
- Keep Your Life Simple
- Happiness and Self-Worth
- Hope--Vital to Happiness
http://watchtower.org/library/w/2001/3/1/article_02.htm

You Can Fight Pessimism
- Battling Pessimism
- Positive, Goal-Oriented Thinking
http://watchtower.org/e/20040422/article_03.htm

Where Can You Find Real Hope?
- A Deeper Definition of Hope
- The Basis for Hope
- What Hope Does God Give Us?
- What Hope CAN Do for You!
http://watchtower.org/e/20040422/article_04.htm

Life Has a Grand Purpose!
- Why God Created Humans
- It Is Still God's Purpose
http://watchtower.org/e/pr/article_05.htm

Answer 6

ok... my word(s) of advice is that you are sufferin from depression. Im not a doctor or anything but I do know what signs to look for in this situation. Im pretty sre taht you want to be happy but you just dont know how to get to that place or where to turn. My advice is try those anti-depressant pills. I fyou dont bvelieve in tht o dont want to wry about it then try to look at happy memories from before you were like this.

I hope you find happiness and stop the hollow feeling deep inside you.

Answer 7

I think you could be depressed and you should make an appointment with your doctor as soon as possible and tell him what you are feeling. I dont know if this will help or not but you might read " The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. It helped me. Good luck.

Answer 8

I think you need to find a way to express yourself. Find something you enjoy that can help you release your feelings and help you to feel better about yourself. I know that for me, my expression is writing.

You could also try talking to a friend or someone you trust to help you through this. One of my best friends is bit insecure and constantly worried and stress as well and I know it makes her feel better to talk to me and just release whatever she's feeling. Sometimes you just need that one person who is willing to listen.

You aren't useless and you do have a purpose on this great earth. You just need to find yourself.

I wish you all the best. :)

Answer 9

That hollow feeling is a good description of one of the symptoms of depression. Talk to your doctor. and describe everything you have written here, including the worry.

It can be better, promise!

Answer 10

some say adversity builds character.... not true... it reveals it