How have you coped with an addict sibling?

Question

I have a 21 year old sister who is highly addicted to drugs and alcohol to the point that she no longer lives a normal life. She just exists for drugs and drinks. My family is torn about the situation and can not seem to find DECENT, low cost or free rehab programs? Believe me, I have called Crisis Hotlines and checked the internet. All of the free/low cost places also house ex cons, mental disorder patients and the homeless. I feel like I am helpless to provide her with any resources. She claims she wants help, but I don't know how to help her. To cope, I avoid her phone calls (she calls drunk and crying, which stresses me out). I am at my wit's end. Any advice or word's of encouragement?

Answer 1

Sounds like you are doing all you can do. Hang in there and never give up hope on her! If an addict loses everything, they still have something to live for if they know someone still loves them and believes they can still get better. One thing that helped with an ex of mine who became an addict is when he was put on probation his parents would call his parole officer when he screwed up and insist on him asking a judge to ORDER rehab. It is possible, you just have to be persistent and ask the parole officer for help every time. Check the laws in your state, it could be different. Good luck!

Answer 2

Try to be there for her as much as possible. If she says she wants help then she might really does. Talking to her over and over again, even about the same stuff will help her a lot. Keep her happy and pleased, that will lower the drugs and alcohol she is talking, hopefully to a point where u can do more, or the rehab center can do more. Praise her when she does, even a very small or insignificant thing, and do not insult her when she has done bad. Your sister is like a very small child and she can't make a difference between good and bad now. Also she is a lot more vulnerable to things. It's a great thing to see such a devoted brother, but I am afraid you have a long way to go it you want to see her clear of that. Good Luck :)

Answer 3

When my younger brother was 17 years old, his father died and he confessed taking drugs. During the next five or six years, my mother and I had to deal with his addiction. We went to hell and came back, but now I can tell that it was worth it: my brother (now 29) is now a dentist, married and with a beautiful and healthy 2 1/2 yrs. old babygirl.
By telling you this I mean to express that THERE IS HOPE AS LONG AS THE ADDICT IS WILLING TO DO HIS/HER BEST EFFORT. It is not easy and it won't be quick... Generally, the addict needs to hit bottom to react --if they ever do. Except for those very expensive and exclusive rehab centers, most of this recincts house people you wouldn't want a relative of yours to be with... That is because we never want to admit that our sibling, adding to its desease (addiction is a desease that those who suffer it have to fight for life) is also a mental patient (wether we like it or not) and sometimes an outlaw. Rehab helps for the first necessary step of desintoxication, but then the real fight begins; that is why it is very important to follow a treatment with a specialist. Also NA helps to some point.
My brother went to desintoxication for a month, where he had to share spaces with ex cons and mental disabled. After that, he was treated by a psychiatric specialized in addicitions and went to NA meetings daily. The first year seemed to last forever... but now its been six years and he is getting better and better, and he still works on it. Because the fight is not only aganist the drugs but also against the addictive personality.
Don't leave your sister on her own; give her all the support and help you can, but with a strong arm. Don´t let her disease nor the drug manipulate you and your parents. It will be a long struggle, but you won´t regret it.

Best of luck. I´ll pray for you.

Answer 4

Am sorry to hear that. My brother was in the same position. But he took after my dad who was a drug dealer, the reason am in forensic science. Anyway, he was highly addicted to heroin not my fathers fault though, he doesnt drink. My brother was a policeman, yip thats right, he got caught with possession and got put in jail, About a week later he raped a female cop and is now servicing life.

There will be no way of helping your sister unless she helps herself first. She has to rid herself of all the habits and people who surround her, and become recusive to world for a month or so, and only ever leave when the family is with her. She needs to become strong again and learn to be motivated in something worth while, like college or a sport.

Answer 5

Never avoid her phone calls that could be her last call for help and you could have prevented an over dose or something please I am not saying this to make you feel any guilt but she need her family that is all she have right now and to lose that would be a tragedy for her she always need a door open so when she decides to come clean she will have support and she know it is there the worst thing would be is to close the door on her it could make her lose the will to live and eventually she would give up and die it happens. So always be there for her of course do not support her habit but support her when she calls listen to her but block out her stress so it will not burn you out watch tv and occasionally respond she might stop calling and call another member of the family but don't totally ignore her just listen to her.

Answer 6

She is really gonna have to hit rock bottom.. If your family or you keep giving into her addiction (giving her money) she will just keep getting high...I know it sounds rough but you have to have your limits....Try and look up a movie I saw ion HBO called addiction..It tells you how to go about things and is very helpful.....If your family dosnt have money enough for rehab then there should be some info on that....There is a new drug called Suboxone..Its for people who are hooked on like Oxycodone, and crack an cocaine and more...I really hope it helpful to you..I know its VERY frustrasting what your going through....

Good Luck~

Answer 7

i am sorry for you. it's never easy in that situation. you have done all you can i think. she needs to do it for herself though. she may say she wants help but, if she did she would make more effort. as a last resort, you could check with the county or state programs. they may not be exactly what you want but, it's better than nothing. like i said though, she has to do it.you could also try an intervention of sorts. if she won't agree to any treatment, it may be time to cut ties. she'll have to hit rock bottom on her own. hopefully, she'll wake up when she does. it's the hardest thing you'll ever do but, as long as you continue to try to do things for her, you're just enabling her. best of luck.