What is great about having two children other than providing a sibling to older child?

Question

Doesn't it just make the family more complicated and stressful or is it pleasant to have a larger family and different types of kids with their own individual personalities?. Should more families just stick to having one and raising that child right?.

Answer 1

Family dynamics change with each child born. There are many studies that demonstrate that a first born child, versus a middle born child, versus a last born child develop differently with varied gifts and strong points to bring to the table.

To me, what that means is that we need each other. A wold comprised of ONLY children would be very different than the colorful tapestry we have.

By providing siblings to children, we give them the opportunity to come to school already somewhat socialized. This mitigates the affects of socialization for the only children in the classroom. By the same token, only children have an ability to play by themselves that children with siblings have an opportunity to learn. The things we learn in grammar school often impact our personalities more than the learning basics we get in middle school, and high school.

Having multiple children does not mean any of the children are raised more right than any other, it simply means that they are all subject to their own unique perspectives on the world. I think as a society we are richer for all those perspectives.

Answer 2

Both my parents are only children, which is definitely not the cultural norm in these parts. I am their oldest child, and sometimes it feels like I'm the younger sibling they never had. There is six years between me and my brother, and seven years between him and my sister, so we were all have some "only child" traits.

I really, really wanted a younger sibling when I was a child. I think siblings are a great socializing element: they're instant friends. Also, for older siblings, they teach you responsibility with babysitting, being an example, etc.

It seems like parenting gets easier with the second kid---you've been around that block before. Also, only children are more proned to being spoiled.

One thing that I don't get to experience with my parents having no siblings are first aunts, uncles, and cousins. I think those kind of family relationships can be good to turn to.

You mention a concern to "raising that [one] child right:" I think having at least one siblingcan help a child a lot, if you (as the parent) are so inclined.

Answer 3

Hi, there are personal preferences, some kids just seem to prefer to be on their own, i am the youngest of 3 and a mother of 1.
When there is more children there is the bond that is so strong, no matter what (even if they hate for a year or two) that is always there, the learning of sharing, of fighting and making up, the play time, the special moments that only someone who was there to share it knows, it is great! I was bullied at school, and my sisters were always there as my protectors to help me not only to stop the bullying, but to also teach me the ways of dealing with the issues. I learnt alot from my sisters mistakes, and i know i do not ever want any less than two kids, sure they can be handfuls with different personalities, but hey if we were all the same, life would be boring!!!!

Answer 4

Ask anyone who is an only child and they will tell you that their life was very lonely growing up. Being an only child is a big burden, especially as an adult because the parents have no other family to spend holidays with, and if the parents become ill, there aren't any siblings to share the care the parents need. Having more than one child also teaches children to get along with others, to share, and gives them a deeper bond within in their entire family. More kids equals more love, more joy and the possiblity of more grandchildren in the future too!

Answer 5

I am the oldest of three kids and the mother of three kids.

I am older than my sister by 8 years and older than my brother by 10 years. Before they were born, I had a bunch of close cousins and great friends, as some others have mentioned. I loved that bunch, but always wanted siblings. I think the cousins were wonderful training for being a big sister, but it was not at all the same. I think thats just something only children have to take my word for.

My siblings made me feel fiercely protective in a way that no one but my own kids ever could. The bond and love I have for them is not the same as with cousins or friends, its something more that I can't quite explain. I learned a lot about people in general from watching them grow up. It has never failed to amaze me that we were raised together but are so vastly different.

I also learned something that no one else has mentioned....humor. With siblings, sometimes they do something outrageous and you just have to laugh or cry. Because I had siblings I learned to share personal space and not to value my possessions much, since they were frequently broken or taken by a vengeful sister or brother. Which brings me to another thing no one else mentioned...toughness. Siblings will beat the crap out of you, say and do hurtful things and thats good. It teaches us to not take our selves so seriously and makes us stronger as people.

I watch my kids interact with each other and I know that they will be better people than thay might have been if I had just had one of them.

My mother passed away 10 years ago. Another great part of siblings is that we can comfort each through our loss in a way that no one else could. We were born of the same mother, share the same memories and grief...it makes her loss easier to bear and makes us all fell less lonely, less orphaned.

Answer 6

It's great having two kids. When I had just one, I was constantly the entertainer. Now I have two they entertain each other. I love watching the things my 19 month old learns from my 5 year old.

Having more children brings you so much joy. My Grandma had 6, and they were all raised fantastically. When you look at mu aunts and uncles, you wouldn't know they were related because they are all so different in many ways, but yet there all so close. And the most important thing is that they really look after my Grandma and bring so many different things to her life.

I would feel priveleged to have lots of children.

Answer 7

well - having more than one child will teach them that the world does not revolve around them. only children (in my experience) are typically more "in-to" themselves (selfish, conceited, etc.).... If you add another one - it gives the child someone else to play with....so the one isn't on your leg all day long....which gets REAL tiring! :)

As far as difficulty level - I think that it all balances out in the end. Going to 2 for me was easy - going to 3 turned my life upside down.....but the thing is - there are things that I find make it so much easier having 3 than 2! I've heard others say that going to 2 turned their lives upside down - but going to 3 was no big deal! Depends on the parents' temperment and personality....

Once you get to 2 - you can't even imagine what it would be like to only have 1.....same when you get to 3! Now, personally - I stopped at 3! I had 3 boys in 3 years (not on purpose either!) and they make me the most happy and crazy mom out there! :)

Answer 8

Beyond just wanting the blessing of having more children (I can't imagine only having had one), kids learn a lot by having siblings. Only children, while often mature and independent, also tend to grow up thinking the world revolves around them instead of learning compromise, compassion, and selflessness - all things that are needed when you have a sibling in the house.

Answer 9

i am an only child, and my daughter is an only child...i was never lonely growing up...my cousins and i are very close (like siblings)...my daughter has very special, close friends, and considers her cousins like siblings, also...as far as lacking compassion, sharing abilities, thinking the world revolves around us, i think that differs for everyone...my husband is the baby of 5 kids, and he's more selfish than i am...he's very needy, lacks ambition, and is dependent...i enjoyed being an only child, and i'm glad we decided to have only one child...we have more time, money, energy, etc...

Answer 10

When you have only one you have no chance of raising a child of the opposite gender. I always wanted one of both. And I am glad I did too. They are close still now as grown ups.