ok this is what i believe; i believe love is choice. not something that just "happens" i think if the chemistry is right it helps; but love is more of a choice. anyways, i am rather straightforward when it comes to relationship; because before i even ask for a relationship i have feelings for someone. (i try to get good friend with the someone first) and after i am in a realationship for about 2 weeks to a month, my feelings really start to play in, i tell them i love them; and i get rather serious about the relationship. it seems to me that it is either friends or a serious relationship. how can i just let off? is it a good thing that i am so serious?
2007-04-07 06:06:07 · 13 answers · asked by SwordDancer 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Being serious about love is a good thing. However; if you fall in and out of "love" often then it seems to be a bit artificial and not true , honest love. I feel a person can be serious and really feel the love for a lot of people but there will come a time when you will meet the right one that is to be forevermore so you don't want to waste all those "love you" and confuse the other person and yourself. Loving humanity and nature and the world is one of the greatest qualities you possess so don't be too hard on yourself and you seem like a unique and wonderful person.
2007-04-07 06:19:06 · answer #1 · answered by luminous 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is a good thing that you are so serious...it's not a good thing that the other people take relationships as a joke. However, i think you should take a little more time with evaluating your feelings for other...two weeks to a month is not time enough to be that serious with someone unless the two of you have been friends first for at least a year. Talk to the other person while you two are friends..ask her how she really feels about you before you tell her how you feel or b4 asking for the next level. In two weeks to a month, she could be asking herself how can he love me so soon and she could be afraid of going to that level so soon. Just take your time, but don't let a broken heart make you stop being serious about relationships. Be serious about time...some people just don't appreciate being serious, some ppl just date so that they can "have a bf" and just not be for real about it. I am not just answering this question because I can..I am answering it because I've been there. I am also serious when it comes to a relationship. GOOD LUCK!!
2007-04-07 13:14:44 · answer #2 · answered by I AM 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well that is a very interesting theory. But I really don't think that real and true love is a choice. I can certainly love a lot of different people because they are part of my life and make my life better.
But to be IN Love with someone is entirely different. It is a state where one will doing Anything for the other person, right up to and including dying for them.
Being serious may just be a part of your general character and your inner need to love someone else.
I find that most males look at all relationships with the opposite sex to be the potential for a love relationship and that person a potential life long mate. So I don't think your outlook is all that different..
However I am confident that many girls will find your super seriousness so quickly is putting way too much pressure on them. Love grows over a long time. And to say you love someone within such a short time can not truly be real love. Relax. Enjoy your friendship with the girl. You can just be friends and see where it goes.....
2007-04-07 13:13:27 · answer #3 · answered by ♥♥The Queen Has Spoken♥♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some things are not so cut and dry. It is a good thing that you are straightforward, it will help you out in life so much, but maybe hold off on your feelings until your sure that you truly love this person. i was like that before i met my husband, and i was either friends or serious relationship. I invested way to much time on men that if I'd of waited a little longer, i could of seen through them instead of being so focused on "we're a couple now" mentality. Hope this helps a little.
2007-04-07 13:16:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think u may be rushing it a bit, Ace! i mean, even if u think ur in love with someone in the 1st two weeks- i guarantee ur not! i thought i was in love with my last bf and found after we broke up that i was in a total fantasy!
after such a short amount of time ur girl may be freaked out if u tell her u love her so soon!
and if u think love is a choice then u should be able to control how u feel towards these girls!
and how many relationships have u had? if u go through the same routine with every gf u have, then u may think that ur moving too fast!
slow down some- u have tons of time to fall in love for real,
Good Luck
2007-04-07 14:21:48 · answer #5 · answered by Lollipop 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to slow right down otherwise you may frighten off potential partners!
If you like someone and you go out with them.....try not to go full on, relax and enjoy their company. If feelings develop then that's fine....enjoy it.
A relationship is serious when you BOTH know you want to be together for a long time.
After two weeks, it is seldom even called a relationship....it's a girlfriend/boyfriend thing....two people who enjoy having fun together.
It sounds like you feel desperate to have a relationship and to fall in love....have you ever thought about WHY you feel that way?
Advice from me is don't get too clingy and show it to whoever you are with.
Best wishes
2007-04-07 13:13:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems you are a person who just knows what he wants. Really, anything between clearly friends or clearly bf/gf is a grey zone that often causes confusion and pain. Sometimes, though, the journey through that grey zone takes longer than others... The only problem is if you are too intense about it, I suppose. Sometimes someone who is very intense and makes 'demands' upon the girl can seem intimidating and stifling... I don't know if you do that or not... But like the previous answerer said, if it works for you than that's fine!
2007-04-07 13:10:28 · answer #7 · answered by Jebbie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your rushing your relationships you really need to step back and let the relationship move at its own pace you can scare women off if you jump to love too quickly and that could be dangerouse just take your time so your relationship can have meaning to it
2007-04-07 13:11:55 · answer #8 · answered by cwilsonhappylife 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well for you it feels right.... but the person you tell this to may think you are pushing yourself on them
these things take time.. love grows with solving problems together.. going through trying times and comming out together and helping each other to grow and depending on each other ... love is a million things all rolled into one..
I think.. if you are seeing yourself growing old with this person.. if you don't see yourself with anyone else..EVER.. then that is love
2007-04-07 13:11:46 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's not good to get too serious after a couple of weeks . wait after 6 mos. never say i love you right off the bat. wait until you hear it first. that's if you are a girl. or you are the more feminime one in a gay relationship.
2007-04-07 13:17:43 · answer #10 · answered by leapyrangels 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋