What can I do to make my boyfriend love me MORE?

Question

I have converted to his religion
I am having his baby
I let his cats stay with me, even though I'm allergic
I gave him my inheritance check from my auntie,
I even changed the way I spoke, just to please him....

I cook, clean, and do everything he asks...but what else could I do?? I know there is more I haven't even thought of! Please, please help!

IF DOING THESE THINGS DO NOT SHOW MY LOVE, then what does?????

Answer 1

unfortunately it is a loss, if you have to do everything to make him happy, then he is not the one for you and you are only burning out yourself to please him, you need someone who is willing to love you without having to do everything

Answer 2

Hi there

I think from what you have said then you've done more than enough already!
I'm in the same boat at the moment and what i can tell you is doing everything for someone is not the answer. Ive done everything i can to try to make my wife love me for me. Ive bought gifts, taken her out and away, bought her the new house she wanted, the works! But none of that has changed anything. He has to love you for who you are not what you do or give. If he cant see what a catch you are after everything you have done for him then hes a fool. What you really need is to get your self esteem back and do things for yourself that makes you sine! Be the woman you were before you met him.
If after all the hard work he still doesn't see the light then its time for a change.

There's a lot of truth in the saying you don't know what you got till its gone.

Good Luck

Idai

Answer 3

try less?
or find someone that actually cares about you?
you cant "Make" someone love you, but you can look or wait for someone that will actually love you.
changed the way you spoke? what you cursed like a sailor? and he said thats not very lady like?
and guys with cats... filthy beasts, ten thousand years of evolution and progress and you put a box in your house to store fecal matter in. yay!
a guy worth his salt wouldnt take your money, especially your blood money, he'd get a job and work it off himself, or at least make a huge effort to pay it back into the relationship.
but hey! there's a child involved now and it's no longer really all about 'you'.
at first glance id guess your giving too much which doesnt encourage people to love you more from my experience, healthy love has boundaries and gives as much if not more then it takes.

Answer 4

You have become a doormat. No man likes a doormat, he just uses it. Make him pay you back your inheritance check. Sue him for it if necessary. Any man who would take that from you is no man. You are old enough to know better. If he cared about you he would not subject you to his cats and he would not use you. He doesn't love you he is just using you. He will dump you when you have nothing left to give. Why didn't you use birth control? Next time if you want to have a healthy relationship, show some self respect. You need to grow up and stop pampering this guy and allowing him to use and abuse you. Dump his cats and then dump him. And... sue him for child support.

Answer 5

Unfortunately Gail, I think Daniel R is right. I was shocked by how much you've done for you bf. I have to say from experience that giving a guy everything in the world will NOT make him love you. In fact, it just makes him think you're weak and someone he can take advantage of.

I think he sounds like he's not the one for you. I wanted to say a lot harsher things about him, but I will save those thoughts for myself.

Someday you will find the right guy. He will love you for who you are and you won't need to do anything extra for someone who truly appreciates you.

I wish you strength to get through this tough relationship and do what's best for you.

Answer 6

Love has nothing to do with giving up your personality.
Your self denying program sounds a bit scary to me. You make yourself totally depend on him, I've never seen it work when it's about developing stronger feelings for another. Why aren't you trying to get a bit more of a life of your own, find out about what your elementary needs are and strive to be as complete within yourself in order to be a potential partner for anyone: the man you love, your baby, your friends...
I believe that it's not interesting for a man to have a women give herself completely up for him - just convenient!

I wish you true happiness, good luck!

Answer 7

Well Gail--you sure are trying very hard--too hard if you ask me---but a baby is coming and you will not have time to do what you are doing for him now. It isn't necessary to do all that stuff---seems like you have an idea that you have to do it all and he doesn't have to do a thing--oops that is wrong--you BOTH have to work at it. You are going to fizzle out and start to hate the life you have--slow down and relax. When the baby comes--he will have to do his share of the work to help out--fact is he sounds like he could be an abuser--I can't wait to hear the other details.

Answer 8

If you do all this now what will he expect of you if you ever wear his WEDDING RING????? you do more for him then i do for my husband the reason i don't do all this for my husband is because he loves me for me and i love him for him thats what matters in a relationship...You can not and never can buy LOVE it'll never work out...and you must relax more with one on the way *Congrats on the baby* you must focus on yourself * taking care of yourself* for the baby that soon will be here...babies are a hand full and so much fun...soon you'll be a PROUD MOMMY and maybe he will be a PROUD DADDY when the baby is here until then be happy and take care of yourself...Please don't take any of this the wrong way it's a friendly advice

Answer 9

Boy I sure hope you are kidding, because if this person is not worshiping the ground you stand on just for doing one of those then you have done all you can...and you should realize that if you have done what you said then you are a remarkable person ...and if you are not getting the love you need at home, there are literally hundreds of thousands of men who will be more than happy to replace him.

Answer 10

I dont want to sound cruel, but you need to stop trying so hard. If you continue like this, doing everything just to please him, he will only take advantage of you. Maybe he is already. Be yourself, speak your mind, and dont put up with any crap from him. He will definately respect you more. If he doesnt love you for real, nothing you can do will make him love you. You are a sweetie, and I hope to god he appreciates all you have done for him.

Answer 11

Nothing. If its there its there.

I had a relationship where he tried, poor guy, but I just didn't feel it.

And sometimes when you give too much, they take advantage of it.

But you can earn respect form him and then he might come around

You are not supposed to be his girlfriend not housekeeper, babysitter, bank, mother.

You need to change and be more confident in yourself. Take care of yourself. Make you important then he'll see you as important. Women Empowerment!! LOL