Is my Catholic religion real?

Question

I don't know what to do. When ever I have to go to church it feels like such a burden. I find myself thinking, Ugg, I would rather be doing something else! It's so boring and when I go I feel so tired! I fell asleep at church almost every time I went until I had my first communion and I had to stay awake.
I'm in seventh grade now and I'm preparing for my confirmation. I dont want to get confirmed, at least I didn't. Now when I think of getting confirmed I just think, Oh well, I can't not do it.
The reason I have to get confirmed is because my parents are such good Catholics and I just cant disapoint them. I always think to myself, When I move out I'm never gonna go to church. But then they'll know, and what if I start having a bad relationship with my parents? I don't want that!
I don't know what to do! It's so hard. Do I tell my parents "I don't want to get confirmed!" and live my childhood being hated. Do I folow what I don't believe or do I get confirmed then drop out after I leave?

Answer 1

First: Relax. These questions demand answers, but they don't all need to be answered right now.

Second: It's okay to feel confused and conflicted. However, it's not okay to allow your emotions to influence your decisions -- your chances of making the right choice are not good.

I think the second half of your question (which is quite well written, by the way) answers itself. At your age, it does no good to upset the people who love you and who will be feeding and housing you for at least a few more years.

Therefore, it appears that you will have to go through with the confirmation. Sorry about that.

That's the bad news.

The good news is, you're smart enough to make good use of your teenage years. So get yourself an education, both in and out of school. Read everything you can get your hands on. Think for yourself. Don't start a lot of arguments -- especially with your parents -- but listen carefully and critically to what others tell you, and ask yourself "Why do they want me to believe this?"

And the best news is, soon enough you'll be an adult and you can make your own decisions. Until then, be aware, be patient, and be strong. You're not alone.

Best of luck to you, dear.

Answer 2

Interesting question. I suggest that before you make any decisions you investigate further into what Catholicism is; also, do not look first at non-Catholic sources. The best way to find out what the Catholic Church teaches is to read her teachings directly. For the most part, they are very clear. Get your hands on a Catechism of the Catholic Church and read it until your eyes blur. Your question is articulate, and you sound intelligent. The Mass seems boring; can you tell me what each part means? What were the readings last week, and why were they chosen for Palm Sunday? Why does the Church celebrate liturgical seasons? How is the Church related to Judaism, and is there the continuity that one would expect from a fulfillment of the Law of Moses? Why would Jesus come to us in the form of bread and wine? If you are like me and others I know, you may be putting a lot more time into studying frivilous things (e.g., video games, bands, clothes) than into studying the most important question of all: Is there a God, and if so, what does that mean for me?

These are very important questions, and there are many more just like it. You are correct that you should not be forced into Confirmation. Too many are put through a program against their wills, and too many are confirmed without faith. That being said, Confirmation (as a sacrament) bestows certain spiritual gifts, one of them being the gift of faith. Perhaps this is a sacrament that you would particularly benefit from receiving.

One last note: there are many who call themselves Catholic who are not, but to truly be Catholic IS to be Christian, and Christian in the fullest sense of the word. Catholics who go to Mass and meditate on what is being said hear much more of the Bible than one would think. Every Sunday Mass (with the occasional substitution) there is a reading from the Old Testament, one from the Epistles, and a Gospel reading. Many of the things claimed about the Church by non-Christians are based on misunderstandings and old falsehoods that require a great deal of explaining, just as if I insisted that your television was a Martian satellite, and required you to prove me wrong. Read what the Church teaches directly before making any assumptions. You asked if your Catholic religion is real. The answer is most simply yes, it is real and true. It is your choice whether or not to nourish your Catholic FAITH. The Catholic Church exists so that we might have a safeguard of our faith and trust in Christ, and so that we might not be led astray by false gospels. Plenty of others here are telling you to follow your heart, and again, if you're anything like me, most of your Catholic friends feel the same way you do about Confirmation. The heart, however, must be subject to the head; we are rational beings, after all. And the head must be adequately informed. Your decision is certainly your own; however, make sure it is an informed decision and not one made out of boredom. There are plenty of worthwhile things in life that start out boring. It is your job to make sure that you are not neglecting something important for a trivial, selfish reason. Hope this helps.

Answer 3

Pastor Billy says: I just can't stand by and read all these poor answers without responding.

The best answers so far are those from enigma21 and john w.
What you are going through is what most young people go through you are attempting to rebel, assert your freewill. Chances are your parents like the rest of us felt the temptation to avoid Mass because at the time it wasn't entertaining. You are at a stage in your life where you tend to be selfish. Changing to another faith or Protestant sect isn't going to change that. Mass is focused on Jesus Christ and worship of God not focused on you. Until you realise that no other worship in another Christian or non-Christian will change things. I was a young Catholic as yourself who at one time felt like you but that was because I didn't know my faith.
You should talk with the parish priest explain your feelings he might ask you have you never studied why we do what we do as Catholics at Mass? Catholicism is very interesting once you dive in.

The point here is you have to make the effort at whatever you do. Any of these people telling you about getting to know Jesus in a personal relationship are talking about you making an effort to know your Catholic faith. There is no better place than being in the arms of the Catholic faith to know Jesus. To have a personal relationship really means to have it in a family relationship and that means being a member of the Church which teaches it. Study your Catholic faith before making the big decision you won't regret it, ignore the anti-catholics posting here they only have one desire and it isn't in your best interest. Look away from the bible thumpers who only have a bible because the Catholic Church as preserved it for them through the centuries. Your growing up now and soon you'll be an adult it's funny how your opinion changes once you get there. You'll discover a longing for something that wasn't so interesting before I did. I'm proud to be Catholic today I'm glad I took time to learn my Christian faith. Today I understand the highest Christian worship is the Catholic Mass my being entertain is not the focus, the focus is Jesus Christ and at the Mass he is physically and spiritual there.

Learn your faith you'll need it some day. Check out my blog and make sure to talk with some at the parish you need some council.

Answer 4

There are a lot of Protestants going to their church services that feel just like you do.

The bottom line is you need your own experience with the Lord Jesus Christ and not that of any church or anyone else in the world.

If you truly don't believe in your heart that you should be confirmed you need to talk it over with your parents. If they insist then be obedient. What you disagree on is not as important as the spirit you keep in yourself and between you and your parents. I am telling you this as a Protestant who really sees no value in traditional Catholic teaching and practice.**

**What I am saying is that your relationship with your parents is a God given circle not to be broken, except in the face of wickedness. To honor parents is the first Commandment of God with a promise. Keep that Commandment. Don't let all the things pulling for your attention as a 7th grader get the best of you.

Your moving out may be five years down the road and few people can judge that far ahead. Enjoy your parents. Until you are older, you will never know how short five years can be, or how good you really have it right now!

Answer 5

I'm sure, when you were younger, there were things your parents pestered you about. Brush your teeth, do your chores, don't watch too much TV, those kinds of things.

At the time, you probably thought your parents simply wanted to bug you with "busy work". Now, however, I bet you can appreciate the value of good oral hygiene, a clean kitchen/house, and limiting the amount of time you spend watching tv, going to bed on time, and all that.

Some of these things, you will probably always find somewhat burdensome - but you will do them without question anyway because you possess an understanding of their importance.

God is like another parent. He has things He wants you to do to, like go to mass each week. Going to mass seems like a burden, at first, but as time goes buy, you will begin to see the necessity of it.

I never once considered the possibility of not going to Church once I was out on my own. I kept going, in part because I too was afraid of what my family would think, but mostly I went out of habit. Sunday morning wasn't the same without Church. I day-dreamed my way through years of Church before I realized the good had always done me and the good it will always do.

You claim you don't believe. Do you really not believe, or do you just not want to believe?

Answer 6

This is tough. I agree with you about the Catholic religion. I was raised Catholic and church bored the hell out of me as well. I realized by the time I was "confirmed" that I didn't believe in any of it. But I went ahead and got confirmed, because I figured I'd have to deal with less crap from my parents by doing it than by not doing it. In other words, I figured it was easier to be a hypocrite than to stand up for my actual convictions.

I can't say this was the right way to do things. But then again, my parents, even though they made me go to church, etc, were never really nuts on religion. If I had just sat down with them and explained why I didn't believe in it, they may have actually understood. (I did stop going to church after a while, and eventually my entire family followed suit. Now none of us go, even on Christmas. And we're all just fine, thanks! So I at least did that much for my family.)

Other people, not so much. I have friends who were kicked out of their houses for rebelling against their parent's religion. Which speaks volumes about religious "morality!" I guess my best advice would be to try to decide whether you're going to ultimately have more freedom to do what you want by being honest with your parents about how you feel, or by complying with their religion until you move out and are on your own. We all have to put up with our parents until we can feed ourselves...lol.

Answer 7

Confirmation is far more than simply making a statement of faith to God -- God knows the truth, no matter what you say -- it's taking a step toward adulthood. It's natural to hesitate, but it's a step you should take if at all possible. Confirmation marks a point at which you are seen as more mature, more ready for life, and it should be a celebration of your growth and courage in life.

Talk to your mom and dad or others you trust about this, but all in all I think you should go through with it. It is an important time, one that should not be missed.

Answer 8

Your Catholic faith is real. It taught your parents and your grandparents and all that came before them. It will help you as you grow up. When you are thirty and married and have your own kids the Church will help you teach them good moral values. Going to church is not a burden. Over the years I have found that it refreshes my soul. Also, you will always meet good people in Church.

Answer 9

well,many catholic will answer your question: it is true! and many non catholic will say: it is not!

anyway, we are humans and have inner questions that always arise as we grow up and need satisfying answers where did we come from?why are we here?who made the world?what is the truth?what is the true religion?
many people ignore these questions...as they arise! especially when they find that their religion does not make sense to them or if they find it irrational because sometimes changing religion cause many problems to them.
and others continue their way searching the truth to satisfy their souls and minds no matter what they face.
well i advise you to think and study your religion and other religions ,the truth is present somewhere so read and read .
read the sources then the opinions about them.
and ask your questions and think and take your own decision away from everyone ,because it is your life and your responsibility .

Answer 10

What do you believe in? Is it being Catholic, is it not disappointing your parents?

Do you believe that Jesus Christ came to save the world?

Maybe the reason that you're falling asleep and having these aggressions towards your church is that it's not real for you. You're not excited about it. You don't wake up thinking, 'Gosh, I can't believe Jesus loves me so much!'

I don't either, but still...maybe being Catholic isn't for you. Maybe you don't believe in it. Or maybe you're just bored. Is there anything you have against the Catholic religion? Maybe you should get a Bible and just read it. It might do you some good.
I'm not saying you should abandon your parents or anything. I'm in 8th grade, I get bored in church too. But I know that it's important for my faith. Me coming and worshipping the Lord is the least I can do after he died for me.