This guy continues to follow me. He is the absolute 'profile' of a serial 'something'. He is small, indiscript, no girl friends, no family, has entry level jobs (gas station attendant, KMart stocking person). Keeps flirting, telling me he loves my 'lady like' behavior, way of dressing, being polite, etc.. Now, he's started with telling me he IS flirting with me (knows I am very married), and keeps saying he "really wants me to not be so happily married, 'cause he really is SOOO attracted to me'. If he were not such a sad case of being a 'lost soul' I would have told him to get lost OUTLOUD a long time ago. I never like to hurt feelings. Still, he IS scaring me. I do NOT in any way give him ANY idea that I am interested. I keep telling him, "you know my husband...........we are very happily married.". Now what? He won't quit. He scares me.
2007-04-06 06:06:49 · 13 answers · asked by laurel g 6 in Health ➔ Mental Health
Tell your husband, and definetly file a report, this guy is a stalker, regardless of how you feel about being nice, in his mind you are responding and that's what he wants, the attention, any attention gives him hope and that propells him to continue. He could do you harm, and other women in the community - do yourself and them a big favor - report him, never go anywhere alone, and try to go with your hubby everywhere!
2007-04-06 06:13:25 · answer #1 · answered by galfromcal 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes I would definitely tell him the truth in a polite way (at first) Tell him you appreciate the nice things he says about you, (your pretty or whatever) and that it's really nice but inappropriate. That you are happily married and it's making you uncomfortable for him to say these things to you and that you wish he would respect your wishes and stop and leave you alone.
someone else needs to know about this just in case he ever gets "crazy" on you. Maybe take your husband with you in a place you know you will run into him and just let your husband follow you from a distance and then if this guy starts to bother you then let your husband come up and tell him to knock it off or else he will get the police involved.
This just reminds me of the mentally challenged kid who just has this crush but does not know when to stop because there is no chance for him. You didn't say if he had a mental problem or not but you could get a police officer to talk with him before any restraint is issued.
Good Luck
2007-04-06 06:25:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hope you have told you husband about this nut case. You should file a police report; however, I can tell you that they will not be able to do anything about it until he does something. I doubt if you will even be able to get a restraining order.
Keep track of every time he approaches you. Keep a good log in case you can get a restraining order. The police will tell you if you need to actually come out and tell him to leave you alone. I think this could be dangerous but I don't know if you need to do this legally.
Good luck honey and I am so sorry this is happening to you.
2007-04-06 07:05:34 · answer #3 · answered by Patti C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are sure you've told him that you don't want him talking like that anymore, so he knows exactly how you feel (some guys need to be told right to their face, they don't take a hint or read your mind), then call the police and file a report. Have you had your husband talk to him? That might be a place to start. If the guy is actually seeking you out, then he's a stalker and is committing a crime.
2007-04-06 06:12:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell him this: "I have repeatedly told you that I am married and still you refuse to RESPECT that. I am NOT interested in you at all and if you bother me again - even one more time - I will go to the police and they WILL charge you with harassment and slap a restraining order on you.
Make sure you keep your word. If you falter once, he won't take your warning seriously. You should talk to the police to find out exactly what Your rights are and inform them of who he is - in case he does grab you.. at least they'll know who to go after.
and STOP being so nice to this a$$hole! grrr .. i get so p'd off at women who whine about stalkers while they encourage them just by being nice. Cut it out! ..
No means No. Respect your own boundaries and again Talk to the Police.
Yahoo Answers does NOT confront or stop stalkers - YOU and your local Police DO.
good luck
2007-04-06 06:29:25 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely say it "OUTLOUD" before going to the police because they are going to ask you if you have told him so. I agree that what this guy is doing is very freaky, but you are enabling him by letting this go on for so long. Don't play the innocent victim, next time you see him stand up tall and talk to him like you would your annoying bratty little brother. Tell him to take off eh.
2007-04-06 06:21:40 · answer #6 · answered by gnomes31 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
definite it has, per chance because the time-honored copper will be defined as a lion led via donkeys. most of the authorities Constables it type of feels are Labour apparatchiks, zealously following the social gathering line. which means they are literally State Police. We older human beings grew up with a Police stress who we respected and relied upon to preserve the final public. a number of their approaches would were somewhat difficult, yet in the direction of hardened criminals and under no circumstances individuals of the widespread public who, as an social gathering attempt to protect themselves adversarial to attack. solid coppers are leaving in droves or retiring early leaving in simple terms the brainwashed, politically splendid to do the 'policing'. As this appears to be like centred on drivers and different non violent offenders it really is not any ask your self they panic and lash out even as confronted with what they arrive across to be a risky challenge. they favor to remove the quick song promoting of graduates and promote authentic coppers with quite a number of journey of their position (if there are any nonetheless round) it would also be a fantastic idea to deliver back the former gadget of retired senior military officials to operate chief Constables!
2016-11-26 23:02:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
what this is, is a case of sexual harassment and if you work with this guy you need to tell your boss. or if you don't work with him you need to complain to his boss. what he is doing is not right and he may be harmless but you don't want to take that chance. and maybe if it someplace you frequently go to don't go alone either wait until your husband can go with you or go with a friend. at any rate it is making you uncomfortable and something should be done. don't let him get away with it. good luck hope this helps. ps if he starts coming to your house or calling then you need to also file a cmplaint with the police. they won't do much but it is a paper trail.
2007-04-06 06:25:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You just need to say NO to him. I am not interrested. Stop disturbing me or I charge you to the police. Another tip is to get a lawyer to reviev your situation. But the first step is to say NO over and over again. If he is scaring you get a friend with you as support. If you knew a bodybuilder type he is a good choise in order to scare him. Johan
2007-04-06 06:18:04 · answer #9 · answered by Johan from Sweden 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think what everyone said here covers all the bases but one more thing. do not feel discouraged about restraining orders. although it wont prevent this asshole from harming you, if, and let's hope not, he does, his punishment will be more severe. also, i think you should seek real advice on these things on how you should respond to him. i.e. bringing your husband with you, what to say, etc. trust me he may seem harmless, but that is just a cover up. he i a stalker.
2007-04-06 12:19:44 · answer #10 · answered by babeecakes510 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋