My Grandma died a few days ago, and we don't live in the same country as her, but I was very close to her. My parents are sad, but I still don't beileve it. It just feels like a normal day... How can I just accept her passing?
2007-04-06 03:37:31 · 20 answers · asked by :) 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The sad thing is that your Grandmother living in another country has made you used to her not being around. If she were around you more often then you would feel her absence more strongly. I remember when my grandmother dies I felt it instantaneously but we saw her al the time and everyday. Another side of it is that on a philosophical side you can argue that she is not dead as she continues on in your memory and you have not yet run into a situation where you have had to adjust the way you think about her. There will come a time, though, when it hits you and I don't want to put ideas into your head. Spiritually maybe you can feel the presence of your Grandmother and it is comforting. I don't know if you believe in God and ghosts but I do as well as other. Unfortunately, a big part of it might be denial. You may not want to accept her death for many reasons like it is too painful or you are trying to keep it together so you can help others in your family who are not holiding up well. Whatever the reason, which is probably a combination of several, this is your greaving process. Maybe you have never had to deal with death before or for you death is not the tragedy it is for others. You're not a weirdo and your time will come to grieve. Until then be there for others and watch out cause when it hits you it might hit you hard. Ultimately, even if she is physically dead she can still be a part of your life as an inner voice or presence which reminds you of what she would say or do like when you have a problem and need advice or comforting. PArt of her still lives in you and others. IF you believe in reincarnation then someday she may come back as someones child... even maybe perhaps yours.
2007-04-06 03:47:57 · answer #1 · answered by Don Quesadia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry about your Grandmother -- I know just how you feel!
My Grandfather and I were very close, and the day he died I couldn't believe that the sun was shining, and the birds were singing -- how dare they! After a few days of mourning, I had a beautiful dream of him sitting at a white table under a large oak tree. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and he was pain-free and happy! It helped me realize that no matter how sad I was, life goes on, and he would want me to cherish his memory by being a joyful person! It does get better, the pain will ease day by day.
May I suggest you write your feelings in a journal? They will become precious to you in the coming years.
I wish you and your family well!
2007-04-06 03:44:08 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl I am very sorry for your loss... I can completely empathise with you because that's how I felt when my grandma died in March of 2000. My mom came home and told me and I didn't even cry. I didn't believe it because I didn't want to believe it. I don't think I really even acknowledged it until I saw her in the casket. It took me a long time to really accept it. I don't know what to say to console you, but if you ever need a friend to talk to or just to get your anger or concerns or anything out, just email me.
2007-04-06 03:49:30 · answer #3 · answered by Green-eyed Nikki 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are just not really accepting the fact yet. Your mind, body and soul have to agree when it is time for you to grieve. It's not that you are being selfish it has to actually dawn on you that she's gone. My grandmother has been dead for over 5 yrs. and there are times were I still can't believe that she is gone. She was my mother's, mother and I lived next door to her for 18 yrs. I was very close to her. Two and a half years after I moved away she passed away.
2007-04-06 03:48:17 · answer #4 · answered by memi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how u feel I lost my grandma too from cancer, I seen her the day b4 she pass away but anyways yes its very hard to get over someone passin away I was close to her too. When I started missing her I pray and I talk to her, might think its dumb but it helped me alot. It will get better give it time, close your eyes she will b there. I had a dream few weeks after her passin away and i dream she was sittin in her chair and I walked in the room and there she was. She looked at me and said congrats bc im gettin married. She never knew I was gettin married, and she told me she loved me and she turned into a star. I think that is what helped me bc shes gone I cant see her but yet shes still here. it will get easier i promise take care!!!
2007-04-06 17:11:55 · answer #5 · answered by heaven 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best friend just lost his younger brother and that day or two after no one believed it, not even his parents. There are stages of grief. You will go through yours, it just takes time. That is why there are funerals- it helps you believe they are really gone. I am so sorry for your loss. I hope that your family rests easy knowing she's in a better place and waiting to see all of you again in the future.
2007-04-06 03:44:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the first few weeks you do not believe it and push it aside.
If you go to the funeral you will still not believe it, but still cry. But after a month you will then realize the truth and have a breakdown in tears repeatedly.
You will accept her passing eventually, but it takes time.
2007-04-06 03:42:44 · answer #7 · answered by griffen1989 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry about your grandma. It's very hard to accept
the fact that a loved one is gone forever. But praying
helps alot. That loved one is gone physically, But their
spirit and beautiful memories will always be in our hearts.
Once you understand this you will feel alot better. It takes
time to heal. Best of luck & God Bless.
2007-04-06 03:57:50 · answer #8 · answered by lizzy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry for your loss. My grandmothers are still alive. One is 86 and the other 93. I guess I"m looking forward to a nice, long life, right?
Time will help you accept it. Embrace your memories. It'll become real and you may not be prepared for that.
2007-04-06 03:41:02 · answer #9 · answered by Lisa A 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i am sorry to hear such bad news. My heart goes out to you and if i could i would hug you until you learn to accept it. It usually feels like a normal day at first. Keep a journal close to you and keep all your thought in there it will help to write your thoughts out when you need to talk to someone but don't want too. Sorry to hear about the bad news. :'(
2007-04-06 06:09:01 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋