Help Me!!!!!!!!?

Question

I have friends at school..but when it comes to recces .I always walk alone..and be alone at school..the reason why am I being like this is because im afraid that everyone will know that i am a sissy..im a quiet guy at school..I dont talk to strangers and bad people(that I think they might calling me names later on) so Ive decided to be alone..and dont walk with anyone ..because im afraid..history n experience has told me to be this way..can I be this way forever? I used to be talkative,friendly guy and always have friends when it come to recces,school..but now everything changed completely as I found out that im not as normal as everybody...so ive chose to be quiet and a loner guy at school..but at the same time..I hate when everybody call me a lonely n looser with no friends...and I also think that I AM A LONELY GUY..but at the same time I dont want people to call me sissy n names..Arghh what should I do??????????????????????

Answer 1

u knw wht same prob wit me... u cn do 2 things..
1. go out n make frnds those who understands u.. u lik to be wit.. those who wont call u by name or sissy.. etc etc
2. be the way u r.. i mean so wht if ppl calls u by name or sissy?? u wnt change by them calling u by some silly names.. just learn to ignore them..if u hav fun being alone so be alone.. its ur life nt others... i mean u r living it nt others..n u hav the right to decide wht's gona happen in ur life.... nt every1 is the same.. so some ppls will like it some ppl wnt.. n we cnt live our life by looking at how others do...

Answer 2

Well.... obviously the problem is not the people around you but its coming from you, I'm sorry to say. Looks like you have been hurt or have some sort of issue still unresolved that’s making you think this way. Since you are afraid of people talking about you and knowing who you really are you have decided to reject them first.

I think what your doing is natural reaction to someone that’s been hurt previously by someone or loved one. You believe you are a sissy. I don't know why you believe that but i guess you would have your reason.

I am kinder in the similar situation with you. I don't have much people around me than before. I have lost lots of good friends and family that I thought was dear to me. But that wasn't my fault it was them that were wrong.

Look my advice to you is, just be yourself, open up and Don't be concerned about what people are going to say about you. I know this is easier said than done but you have to realize that there are still good people out there who really care, understand and accept you as who you are. They are the true friends and they are out there.

Also you have to find out exactly what you fear the most and over come this. I don't know exactly what you fear so much but to be honest I don't think you know either. So, take a minute, think things through and once you find it, then be clear on what you are going to do to over come it and try.
I'd give that a try about a hundred times and never give up on trying till it’s gone.

One last thing is, there is no point in seeking friends when you will not give others a chance is there? I mean i wouldn't consider the ones that call you names like loner or sissy friends? And why do you believe that you are a sissy anyways? I mean being brave does not mean you have to talk to strangers or bad people, I believe being brave is facing your inner fears and over coming them or in a very bad situation making a stand and doing what is right without thinking about yourself is I believe being brave.

Don't worry too much, sometimes being alone is good for you as well. but really things will get better when you open up and let people get to know you. Also why not get a girlfriend or speak to teachers on duty at recess. I bet that will stop others from seeing you alone all the time. Maybe go to the library and look up on things that interests you.
Anyways, I hope all this makes some sense to you and I'm sure things will get better very soon. Good Luck!!!!!

Answer 3

I was exactly the same at school, I was afraid that if I tried to look nice people might call me ugly, so I made myself look as ugly as I could so their comments would be justified & i'd tell myself I couldn't take offense as it was true. Then I pushed away my friends, and did everything alone for the same reasons you did, and I pretended I hated everyone when really I did want friends I was just afraid. I am 24 now and have gotten over this although I still think people are saying bad things about me even if they are being nice to my face.

It sounds like you have some self esteem issues like me, so what did was find something I was good at, learn it in private (as I didn't want people to laugh at me in group classes) and it was enough for me just to KNOW I was good at something. Also I dont know what kind of clothes you wear but wearing something that suits you does wonders for your self esteem, as does making people laugh or having a cool car!

One major thing that really helped me the most was getting a part time job in a shop where I had to deal with people ALL the time- it brought me out of my shell and back to reality.

Answer 4

Hi,
One way you can deal with this is to breathe and try to make new friends.Don't try to be lonesome! I bet if you took tim to go to the mall or go watch a movie with friends they would know how fun it is being around you! And if that dosn't work try to have a get together party for people that you think are nice! But don't just invite the people you know. Don't be the one man band! Be the one party man that has friends not the sissy boy or sore losser! They're not making fun of you their making fun of thereselves!
My teacher always says:
If they say losser to you the light bounces back to them and there sayin that therself is a losser!

Answer 5

Hi. That exact same thing happened to me. I was afraid of opening up and being myself around people. So at school I was mostly alone, hanging out by my locker. As time went I gradually met people that I could be myself with. Friends will come with time. All you have to do is relax and be yourself.

Answer 6

It is difficult to suggest anything considering we do not know how old you are. From your description I would say you are in Middle-High school years when peers and friends are very important. They are and they aren't. Do not be so self-conscious about what "they" say. And do learn somehow to value the opinions of people that matter rather than anyone's. You will make friends with people whom you like and have the same interests.

Answer 7

I had a very similiar problem. Things change... That's life for you. People change and people have to move on. I liked being different though. What's the definition of normal anyway? We are all different. Being quiet meant more people were likely to trust me and consult me on problems that they couldn't tell anyone else. People were always asking for my opinion and I always kept their story safe.
Why worry about what people say behind your back? It's not what they think about you. It's what you think about them. They only talk about you behind your back as they have a problem with you. But that's not your fault. If your a quiet guy then that's absolutely fine. As long as you are being yourself. People should accept you for who YOU are and no one else.

Answer 8

If you want to be aloner it's your choice. However, kids are cruel. Be prepared for the harrassment.

Answer 9

You r not a loser .. Find yourself around people who make you feel good.... Find a woman who makes you feel you r not alone!!