2007-04-05 11:33:01 · 35 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
ok.. if you are gay.. why do you want to get married to a woman ? and yes you really ought to tell her.. and not only will she suffer if you dont, so will you.. think about this... do you want to ruin 2 lives? it isn't fair to either one of you... good luck..
2007-04-05 12:06:07 · answer #1 · answered by nurse_driller 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is about more than just sex. You can also marry for companionship and to produce children. But for it to work, you must come clean to your wife and tell her that you are gay. She can't go into the marriage thinking that you feel the same about her as she feels about you. She needs to know all the information before she decides what course of action she wants to take - to stay with you or move on and find someone who will love her as a woman and not just a friend.
If you are not yet married and want to be, don't do it until you find a woman who will accept you for who you are and who will accept the fact that she will be married to a gay man (ie: maybe no children, maybe you will cheat on the side, etc.). If you're not interested in marriage, then come out and tell your wife (or future wife if you're not yet married) and find a man to live with in love.
In any case, you need to decide if you want to be married or not, and tell your wife that you are gay so she can decide, too.
2007-04-05 11:40:57 · answer #2 · answered by mikah_smiles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you already slept with a man? If so I guess I could understand the dificulty in coming clean. But sleeping when men and women is absolutely disgusting and is probably the reason so many faithful women end up with AIDS today because CONFUSED me who are ashamed of being gay! It's absolutely disgusting but it's your life not mines, but if you are gay be gay, don't play aroung with her emotions or your own. And your wife deserves to know TELL HER, it'd be best for you to tell her than for her to find out on her own. Now if she pulls out a knife I suggest you run bc chances are if she's anything like me...you're a dead man! Be careful, and wrap it before you tap it! Good luck
2007-04-05 11:40:31 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No! You will never have a happy marriage and you will be miserable and you will make her miserable! End it now, come out of the closet and start living the life you want! If anybody judges you for it, it is their problem and not yours! Don't live a lie and ruin your entire life because you are scared of others think! DONT DO IT!
2007-04-05 11:53:00 · answer #4 · answered by snailysnal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You dont think she already knows or suspects? that is unfortunate for both of you. Ask yourself this can you marry her or be married to her and not act on your feelings for others? If you cannot and you are not faithful to her then this is wrong. Do you think she will leave you if you tell her you're gay? That would be unfortunate but it would also be honest. As a woman who I feel is of pretty sound mind and emotional state if I found a man who was good to me and my children and was able to support us and be honest with me i would marry that man whether he was gay or not. I would even be willing to have and raise his children. marriage isnt all about sex. It is very reliant on honesty and trust. Good luck
2007-04-05 11:49:29 · answer #5 · answered by galixcysmagic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so sad that in today's society with all the advances that we have apparently made you feel you have to marry a woman. You both deserve to be happy. Life is to short to pretend. You need to be honest with her. Just make sure that you are sensitive to her needs when you tell her. I wish you all the best in talking to her about this very sensitive subject. Good luck and be happy.
2007-04-05 14:30:40 · answer #6 · answered by Tainted Angel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can never lead a happy marriage life and neither can she... especially if you are married with secrets. Don't do this to yourself or her. You both deserve to get the most from a relationship.
2007-04-05 11:36:46 · answer #7 · answered by kriskabob 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not marry this woman! She deserves to have a wonderful like with a man who will love her and put her first. Even if you don't want to "come out" tell her and let her make up some reason to break the engagement and keep her dignity.
2007-04-09 11:31:37 · answer #8 · answered by bevrossg 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are gay, why did you marry her in the first place? You knew you would be ruining her life and your's by marrying her.
You can't have it both ways. If you tell her that means you are selfish and only care about yourself. If you don't tell her, it means you love her and are willing to sacrifice anything for your marriage, like you promised her you woudl do when you got married.
2007-04-05 12:11:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
A big part of marriage is honesty - I think you should admit it to your wife. I don't think you can be happy knowing that your living a lie.
2007-04-05 11:36:57 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U shouldn't feel guilty, u feel that way, but u can't help it. Admit it to u'r wife. Be happy. Admit it before it's too late.
2007-04-05 13:04:18 · answer #11 · answered by Rifa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋