Would you go out with an ex that broke your heart long ago?

Question

Background: Dated someone for 6 months. He dropped me like a hot potato when we started getting close b/c he just wasn't ready yet.

Two years go by and he asked me to meet him for drinks, at which point he apologized for what he did to me. He wished that he had never broke it off and wanted to try again.
At the end of that night we kissed but I told him I didn't have the same butterflies that I did when we were together. I guess I was still really hurt.

Recently he called me for a "work-related" favor and he didn't ask me out or anything but I can't stop thinking about him. Seriously, am I smokin' crack wanting to go out w/ him again?

Should I ask him out or do you think he's just looking to pass time with someone he's familiar with for a bootie call?

Answer 1

Hate to say it you shouldnt i did it before nothing chaanged.

Answer 2

I don't think he's just trying to pass the time, but instead of asking him out, invite him to a group thing so you can get to know him again. You are somewhat over him or you would have had the butterflies. You probably have a bad taste in your mouth because of what he did, but better that he end it because he wasn't ready, than to let it go on and have you get your heart broken when he still didn't want something serious and you are in love with him. So look at the positives, and again it was only a 6 mo relationship, not a year or more. So try to take some time and get to know him, worse case, you two could become great friends.

Answer 3

This really depends on the guy. Yes, it sucks to have your heart broken, i've been there done that. There was a reason that two years ago he apologized for what he did. This obviously means that he has matured enough to at least admit his faults. There is obviously a reason why you are attracted to him now, and why you were attracted to him in the past. Now that some of your wounds are healed, you can see all of the good qualities that you saw in him before. Nothing worth achieving comes without risk. If you have feelings for him, test out the waters and see if there's a chance to rekindle your relationship. Don't jump in over your head, rather take things one step at a time. If things are supposed to work out with you, it will happen with time.

Answer 4

In this case listen to your heart, what does it tell you. Yes ex's are ex's for a reason. I also believe everyone is capable of changing under the right cicumstances. I believe everyone can change and realize they made a horrible mistake. I did it and let someone go becauseI was not ready now she is married and I wish I could have kept her around. We are good friends and you can tell if it not for her husband we would be together but it is my loss. If you do give him a chance do not give him any nookie, if he stays then maybe it wasn't a bootie call. I hope it works out, only you can determine if he is real and he made a mistake or just horny.

Answer 5

Well it all depends. First of all, do you still like him? Because after 2 whole years, thats along time and people seem to get over things in that much period of time. If you do, then well I really dont see why not you can see where things go. If he said he was sorry then maybe he really was sorry and at the time you dated (2 years ago) he maybe just wasnt ready! People do change in time, but my advice to you is : Take it slow, one day at a time, and see where things go. Whatever you do, dont fall as hard as you did the first time because if things dont work out, youll be broken hearted all over again. Be smarter this time and dont let him fool you again! Goodluck!! Hope I helped ;-)

*Oh and NO I dont think your smoking crack wanting to go out with him again..lol..its normal to wanna give a crush from before another try!

Answer 6

Well you need to do what you think is appropriate for your own situation, but this is what the intention of a good guy like me would be. I broke up with my girl 6 months ago after going out with her for 2 years. Things ended badly, with an argument ending in the break up and a week later her hooking up with her current boyfriend and doing things to hurt me involving him. Within time I was able to talk to her again, strictly phone convo, no meeting for lunch or dinner like she suggested. But now that time has passes I have been able to look over e-mails, IM's, ect. and have come to realize it was not only her fault for the break up but it was just as much mine. I wish I could have another chance to be with her so I could change so many of the things I did wrong and make things work out to a happily ever after ending. I know I could do it too because we were so right for each other. I realized what I had, and if given the chance to re-connect I would jump on it. So maybe this guy you are considering has the same intention as I would if I were to want to get back with my girl. Even though I don't have any intention of retracing that ground, like I said before if the opportunity came, I would jump on it. Give him a chance, as long as he did not physically harm you or cheat on you, he deserves another chance... Go with your instincts.

Answer 7

Well relationships are complicated and no one that ends up together got to where they are without struggles or problems. Because without them then you wouldent appreciate the happiness of ending up together. It think if you want to meet with him for coffee or something then you should do it. Its been a while since he broke your heart and there is no problem staying in contact and taking things really slow and be friends for a while. That way you can give time for yourself to figure out if you still care for him. Because you never know maybe you two are meant to be together. I have so many friends that got back together with their ex's and now they are engaged. But ya take things slow like don't jump in the sack with him right away until you know his intentions. Best of luck!

Answer 8

You know he may be with someone if the last time he called was for a work related favor. You may have missed your chance.
If you are interested in pursuing him again then I would have to tell you to take it slow. Pick a night when you are going out with friends and ask him if he'd like to come hang out with you and some friends and then if he says yes and things go well that night and after catching up with him you find that he is still single go from there and ask him out again.

Answer 9

Hmmm. I do understand how you feel ...I believe we all have been in this kind of situation and it's always very difficult to make up your mind especially when you are still feeling something for the other person regardless if it's still love or hate. If I were you...and am still hold resentments towards him I would take this upportunity to tell him exactly how you feel and tell him how he hurts you, I would not hold back. I truly know that you don't want to rock the boat by saying means to him to scare him off BUT do it anyway. He needs to hear this or I am afraid that you will repeat history all over again. I stronly feel that once you let him have it, even it means hitting him below the belt, by his reponses and reactions you will know the next steps to take.Tell him what you are telling us. I wish you alot of luck

Answer 10

I think he may be genuine. 2 years is a long time for someone to grow as a person and in that time he may have found that he is now ready for something serious, and who better that than you. I'm not saying to rush into anything but go on another few dates and see how you feel, if you don't have that tingling feeling than nothing has been lost. If you don't date again you may regret it as you are already can't stop thinking about him.
I say give it a 'slow' go!

Answer 11

Well I am kinda of going through a similar situation. I think if you really love him go for it- but go in the relationship with a cautious eye. If you go into a relationship knowing that the person has the capability to hurt you- the relationship won't go too far. First start off- by being friends and then very slowly get back into the relationship aspect of it. If you are patient give this time.